[neutrino]

I'm not sure how many of you have read my previous threads but if you've read them you might know that I've had some problems in therapy since I started about four months ago. On Thursday this week I'm seeing my therapist for the first time in 1.5 months. We haven't been able meet up since the end of October due to mandatory lectures at university that I've had to attend plus my therapist going on vacation. He's been back at work for a week now but he didn't have time to see me last week so our next session is on Thursday morning.

Before he left for his vacation I asked him if it would be ok for me to send him an email with some things we need to discuss. He said that was okay so I sent him an email and finally told him about the problems I feel that we've encountered in therapy. We've had some problems and I've been too scared to tell him since I'm afraid of confrontation and conflicts. Anyway, I mustered up enough courage to tell him all about it in an email. He had time to read it before he left and he wrote a short reply where he said he thought it was good that I voiced my concerns and my opinion on things and that we'd discuss it during our next session.

Now I'm a bit afraid of seeing him on Thursday. I'm really looking forward to it because dealing with my life on my own is very difficult right now. But what if he's upset with me? I really tried to not sound aggressive or rude in the email but I was still direct and frank with him. I tried to be as reasonable and kind about it all as possible and I even mentioned that perhaps I've just misunderstood everything but that I still feel like my thoughts and feelings are legitimate. What if he's angry with me and he'll tell me off or something? Or what if he's taken it all really well but nothing changes? What if weeks go by and our problems are still there? What if weeks go by and I still leave our sessions feeling frustrated and disappointed instead of helped and relieved? It really scares me. It also scares me that we basically only have time for two sessions until it's time for Christmas break. Then I'll have to handle everything on my own again.

[gayleggg]

I would try to slow down if I were you and take one day at a time. I'm sure he will be understanding. You want know if things change until you try it. Just worry about getting to the first appointment and then after that worry about the next.

I'm bad about doing those "what if" statements myself and I have to remind myself to take it one step at a time.

[healingme4me]

Originally Posted by neutrino

had some problems and I've been too scared to tell him since I'm afraid of confrontation and conflicts.

Anyway, I mustered up enough courage to tell him all about it in an email. He had time to read it before he left and

he wrote a short reply where he said he thought it was good that I voiced my concerns and my opinion on things and that we'd discuss it during our next session.

Now I'm a bit afraid of seeing him on Thursday.

But what if he's upset with me? I really tried to not sound aggressive or rude in the email but I was still direct and frank with him..

I would say, even if your message had aggressive/rudeness, your T, being a professional AND knowing you face to face, could more than likely filter through it, not attaching his own emotional responses, to it. I'm sure, it's not any of our therapists jobs, to get angry with us, as clients/patients.
You mention Fear of confrontation, and you 'confronted' via email, and are filled with fear of your t being angry or offended. If, he were, it's his responsibility, to assert himself and confront you on whatever you May have done, to offend him. (that's a healthy relationship).

I don't know your history, but I do understand, how I was once afraid of asserting myself. One of the things in my life, was feeling unheard. And wanting to be liked.

Sent from my LG-MS910 using Tapatalk 2