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#1
Mar 02, 2014, 12:25 AM
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Been seeing him for 4 months now. Thought he was a good fit. But the last few times have been frustrating. I just feel like he's not understanding what I'm trying to say.
 I've already had 4 counselors over the years. More than half were pretty lousy. What's wrong with me?! Why can't I connect with my counselors better?? Grrr. I see him again on Monday. I really really hope that we don't have another one of those sessions. Thanks for listening to my somewhat pointless rant.
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Yes. Jesus is the reason I am still alive today.  Diagnoses: MDD, BPD, PTSD, OCD, AN-BP (I don't define myself by my personal alphabet up there, but I put it there so that maybe somebody won't feel so alone  )
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 confused and dazed, Lamplighter
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#2
Mar 02, 2014, 12:34 AM
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What makes you feel he doesn't understand you? There's nothing wrong with you. Therapy is almost like dating you go through a lot of them to find one that works well.
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Dx: Me- SzA Husband- Bipolar 1 Daughter- mood disorder+ Comfortable broken and happy "So I don't know why I'm tongue tied At the wrong time when I need this."- P!nk My blog |
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#3
Mar 02, 2014, 05:02 AM
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Could say 'snap' here, I have this problem with my T too (actually I have it with every T, but the latest one is particularly painful because like you, I initially thought we were a good fit.)
It is my lifelong 'issue' that of feeling unheard not understood wiped out dismissed negated - so I tend to assume that a large part of my experiencing T as not understanding what I'm trying to say is my own stuff. BUT that doesn't mean that T does understand everything. I've also learned that my T actually doesn't understand a lot of what I mean, and I try to be careful to explain myself as clearly as I can, and if I still feel unheard or not understood, I'll repeat and repeat and repeat (often without realizing it) until I think he's got it. The point being that because his experience is different from mine, he actually doesn't automatically get a lot of what I'm describing (it would be useful if he asked a few more questions that would let me know he both doesn't understand and would give me the opportunity to explain more  )This is just to say that maybe you could effectively labour a point, let your T know that you don't feel understood and see what kind of response that gets you. It's perfectly possible that some Ts simply don't and won't ever get your experience - I've had my fair share of those! Hopefully you will be able to pre-empt having one of 'those' sessions tomorrow and talk about what is going on for you. Good luck! LL
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Somebody must have made a false accusation against Josef K, for he was arrested one morning without having done anything wrong. (The Trial, Franz Kafka) Lamplighter used to be Torn Mind |
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