[pinkbutterfly]

I saw her for about a year...she went through a lot with me. She was only an intern...but she was amazing. I totally connected with her. She even came and had a session with me while I was inpatient. I saw her twice a week for quite a while.

I do have another T now...and she's really good...in fact, when I was talking to the supervisor of where my old T was, I told her that I am seeing someone else now, and she asked who. I told her, and she was like, "wow, you got the head honcho" -- she's very respected in this city as a clinician. and she's been practicing for years and years.

When my time came to an end with old T, she said that while she hates to say it, she has to, that after that appointment, I was no longer allowed to email her. Which goes without saying that phone calls would not be allowed either. I just miss her a lot. She said that I will do great things...that she will keep her ears and eyes open for my name in the future (I am in grad school into counseling too). She said she can see me writing books in the future. Maybe someday I will be a successful counselor and author. She was so encouraging to me. I know there was some transference going on. I even felt attraction to her, which I know is the transference...I don't know what to do with all these feelings.

I feel like I can't discuss it with my current T...I started seeing the new T before my time ended with old T and I know she wouldn't like that -- at all. But I knew that I only had so much time with old T, and I knew I needed someone long term. But even after I found her, I didn't know how much my insurance would pay...that took about 4-5 months before I ever found out, and by this time I was really attached to old T.

It's just hard to deal with this. I see my current T tomorrow, and things have been rough, so it's not like this is the only thing on my mind or that I feel a burning desire to discuss. I know there are a lot more important things (like the fact that if I don't have to, I don't leave the house or even get dressed or showered for several days at a time).

Anyway...just needed to let it out I suppose.

Thanks for listening.

[RTerroni]

I know how you feel, I still miss my old Therapist who I saw for 4 years.

[pinkbutterfly]

it sucks doesn't it? like you find a good one...and then they're gone...even though I know she didn't "abandon" me -- she simply graduated and needed to move on...it's hard to not take on some of those feelings of abandonment...

[RTerroni]

Originally Posted by pinkbutterfly

it sucks doesn't it? like you find a good one...and then they're gone...even though I know she didn't "abandon" me -- she simply graduated and needed to move on...it's hard to not take on some of those feelings of abandonment...

That might have been the case with my last Therapist but we broke off things before that.

[recentdiscovery]

It takes time to build that bond and trust, doubly so for someone that doesn't give that trust easily like most of us here. It's an exhausting experience building that, i'm going through it now, and I too would really hate to throw year of bonding down the toilet.

However, the only thing constant is change, and I bet your old T made you stronger, better, faster than you were when you first started seeing her. That's something you can always be grateful for and you can carry that with you, you'll always have that of hers to remember.

You'll do great, just remember what you've learned.

[pinkbutterfly]

yes I do know that she helped me a lot. I am grateful for having a good experience.
I could tell she really cared and I even disclosed things to her that I hadn't ever said out loud. I even emailed her about feelings of attraction to her and we talked about it and it didn't change how she treated me or anything.

At one point toward the end of time together, I said, "I must be your toughest client." She said laughed and said, "a couple of months ago, I would have said yes." I replied with "well that must mean you got someone crazier than me."

[Sunflower Queen]

pinkbutterfly
At one point toward the end of time together, I said, "I must be your toughest client." She said laughed and said, "a couple of months ago, I would have said yes." I replied with "well that must mean you got someone crazier than me."

I would think you made progress in the last few months for her to make that comment.

[Rzay4]

I know exactly how you're feeling. My previous T who I saw for the last year says she can no longer respond to emails or phone calls. She really helped me and it's like a loss. I miss her dearly.