OMG!!!!! H wants to go to one of my sessions with new t, he has been harassing me abo

OMG !!!!! h has been harassing me about this forever, with t1 he came to one of my sessions as per t requests on that same day, 2 session, I was severly depressed at the time, and I had mentioned that there were guns in the house ( unsecured) I know it was a mistake in mentioning that. Anyway, he went up there, and he agreed to buy a safe, but all he did , was freaking complain and cry about my moods, this was before I was diagnosed with anything.

When I started with t2, he kept bugging me about wanting to see t I kept hesitating, h does not know about my past, I choose not to tell, I dont find him as a safe person to disclose, he is very controlling at times, I had a bad past with him, now he is ok. He is not a good listener, he makes fun of my mental ilness sometimes, my t knows this already. I know he is stressed out as well, I am not justifying his behavior though. He is only on my emergency contact list.

He tried calling my substance abuse t last year , I dont go there anymore, and she told him, she could not disclose, because he was only emergency contact, but she offered him to come in for a session, and she could talk about mood disorders to help the situation at home. He declined, he was very rude, and told her he should be kept informed of all my sessions via email and calls as he is my husband. lol, is this a freaking company is he a ceo or something, he says he is entitled to this.

He says that they need to call him and set up appointments around his schedule, not the other way around. Last night he tells me, that he expects to see my t in two weeks, because he needs a weeks a weeks notice to prepare, prepare for what, this is not a ceo meeting, I will discuss this with t , if he goes i only want him there for only 25 min, and only discuss moods, that is it.

My husband goes to some of my appointments. T focuses on how he thinks I'm doing. Never saying she can't tell him whatever question he asks but tends to turn the questions on to him as what does he think that the answer would be and how logical ill logical is that given the 13 years that he has known me.

Do you really think it will help him be more supportive?

This is what ended my therapy. My therapist refused to see me anymore after I wouldn't bring my husband in. I knew my husband wouldn't be more supportive or helpful so I made the choice to basically end therapy over this. Sometimes I feel like I am the only one in the world this has happened to. I am a freak. LOL.

Sweepy - it's your therapy. Your H cannot dictate what should happen there, and he has no right to know what you talk about with your therapist, if you do not choose to tell him. People who are married are still separate people. He is absolutely not entitled to any information you do not choose to disclose. This is really important. If you want to confide in him, then that's fine, but if you don't, nobody can force you to, and you definitely shouldn't feel obliged to let him see your therapist.

Mastodon is absolutely right. I hope you are talking to your t. about this, and your husband's controlling, inappropriate behaviors.

I hope you're able to work this out I know I wouldn't want my h with me in a session. That time is for ME. He used to ask about my appointments every single time but I wouldn't really share much so he gradually stopped asking. I do share some things from time to time now, because he IS supportive of me most of the time (except when he complains about the money once in awhile but then again so do I) but I do not tell him even close to everything we talk about and work through. He doesn't even know what she looks like.

Oh Sweepy, so many red flags, this doesn't sound like someone I'd define as husband. Husband should be the safest person, the most supportive, a true partner. I hope things improve drastically.

He knows, i work on my moods, and how much i dont get along with his mom, but he has known that throughout our marriage he doesnt mind that, and he knows when i use to self harm, that is it, i would not mind if he comes, and the conversation is limited to my moods , but knowing him he will make the session about himself and how he is the victim to all this, and how he has to waste gas money to take me to therapy and how financially its affecting us and boo hoo, I know him all that well, then he will start crying, and he will start with, that i am not affectionate i dont look at him when i talk to him, im not touchy feely , hell i have aspergers syndrome cut me a break, i started therapy late in life, i didnt know i had all these diagnosis, i didnt know why i had all these behaviors, i am happy to know my diagnosis know, it explains alot.

Can you suggest that he gets his own therapist? Maybe at the same time you do so there's no more waste in gas? Try to explain that he needs support to help him deal with being your "care giver" even though that's untrue.

actually, i am the freaking caregive to him and his damn mother, he is a bit disabled , he has a leg problem, and a bit of a bad temper, but he does not hit me, its just emotional abuse sometimes, I take care of thier needs go freaking figure, i meet all thier NEEDS. they are very SELFISH. He does not want to go to therapy he says he is his own problem solver, he is the type of guy that, likes to have everything under control, he is not abusive, but likes to know everything about you.
and being that he takes me to therapy, even though i can drive, but the only thing is i tend to space out, its not safe for me to drive, he says he is entitled to know my therapy treatment plan, since he has power of attorney over his mom, I guess he feels superior and all.

I would talk to T about when and if he should/could talk to your T in and out of session time. IMHO it would be in about 20 years from now or later

He might have POA for his mom but that does not necessarily mean that he has unlimited access to her personal medical information. I had Durable POA for both of my parent and the only time the POA was effective was if they were unable to speak for themselves. Then and only then was I able to make medical decisions for them. The HIPPA laws clearly dictate the who, what and when information is provided.

He is just being a jerk!

The behaviors you describe are abusive. And he certainly doesn't have POA over you.
It may be time that you start meeting your own needs, that you insist on driving yourself, alone to therapy, and that you actually allow him to solve his own problems. If you are actually taking care of his mom at all, tell him you want to be named as secondary POA. Otherwise, leave it to him to arrange for whatever assistance she needs. Seriously. You are describing an unhealthy relationship and, as said before, I certainly hope you are talking to your therapist about this.

Yes I am she said we will have a prep session before the session, and keep a time limit, of 20 minutes, but if she notices negative behaviors, she will politely ask him to leave. We are working on relationships boundaries, current stressors, and anger, even before we get to csa.

it breaks my heart to read "just emotional abuse" as if you are discounting it or making it not a big deal, abuse is abuse, and it's damaging and it's wrong. i agree with others he needs his own therapy. and this is just my opinion i'm not an expert or anything but it sounds to me like him wanting to come to your sessions is a way for him to make the emotional abuse your fault or something. instead of admitting he has a problem and seeking out his OWN therapy. what a dreadful situation. I'm so sorry you're going through this and I'm sending all kinds of good thoughts your way.