Consult #3

So, I had consult number three today. It felt okay; if I hadn't done the one on Saturday, I probably would have gone with this one, especially since she specializes in a lot of my issues, but I'm going to call and book an appointment with the one I saw on Saturday. I felt really comfortable with her. Of course, it might have just been me and my mood was biasing my perception, but I guess it doesn't really matter. And even if the two were equal, the one I saw today is forty minutes away by subway and streetcar and the other one is a fifteen minute walk, so I would go with her based on proximity.

Also, it's funny that the therapist I saw on Friday emailed me today to tell me she thinks we won't be able to work well together. I mean, I agree, and I wasn't going to call her back anyway, but it does feel a little bit like rejection, even though I have absolutely no stake in her. I guess I just wanted to reject her instead of having her reject me. Something to work through, for sure.

Anyway, I am very hopeful about therapy with the T I saw Saturday, and I will book another appointment with her and see how it goes!

Other than that - I'm seeing mentor figure in half an hour. Fingers crossed that things go well with her.

Good luck with this doctor as you continue your appointments. Feeling comfortable and safe enough to share openly with a therapist took me longer than I would have liked to understand as something very important (in my opinion) for getting the most out of my experience in therapy. Anyway, I hope all goes well with your upcoming plans and that you get the help/information you are in seek of from your therapist.

Good luck! Glad to hear you have found one you think will work!

I have an appointment with her on Friday at 4. I get what the "excitement to start working with a T" feeling means. That's how I'm feeling.

Great!!! Hoping things go well with you!!!

Getting an appointment that fast is great. Another + for your choice with this one. Good Luck!

Yay! Glad you found someone you think you will work well with! And even better for a quick appointment!

I hope this new T works out for you! Good luck!

Part of me feels the desire to tell her upfront all the challenging things about working with me...ex. testing people, not trusting easily, putting on a front...this is me trying to sabotage myself, isn't it? She'll find all that out in due time. And I guess when I see her on Friday I will ask her some important questions, ex. out of session contact, whether she takes notes and whether I can read them, boundaries, termination procedure, etc.

IDK, it's tricky to figure out how fast to disclose things even if they are things you're pretty aware of i think. I remember hearing that if you're too open too fast with a new therapist they'll consider that to be a problem, even though being open is generally the idea of therapy. Not that that helps any as far as figuring out what's "too fast". Starting by asking her some questions sounds like a good idea to me. Then maybe there's still time for another topic?

Hmm, you've given me the idea to ask a new therapist (if I have another one some day) how to deal with this. I remember it was difficult at one point when I felt I had made some progress with an earlier therapist but it was a little hard to pick up in the same place with a new therapist. They didn't understand or accept my explanations or really approach or perceive the issues like I had in mind.