[MASIMO]

My T taught me to do this: Ask for what I wanted, be grateful for what I receive, and I will work on the difference.

So I put this to the test, wrote to him about wanted contact in some limited form after he retires, and I emailed that I wanted a response, that I would be most grateful and it would ease my mind from grieving over losing him. NO RESPONSE-TWO DAYS.

Yesterday, I send a short email as I was in a minor crisis. The type I usually let him know about, and they type he usually responds or calls me. NO RESPONSE - ONE DAY.

If I haven't heard by now, I wont. I am aggravated and hurt because he told me to be assertive and ask for a response if I really need to hear from him. I know, I know, he could be away, etc. But I feel like he is not getting back to me because he doesn't want to address my question about having contact with him....I feel he is ignoring me. Should I be angry if I never hear from him before my session next week? Cant stand feeling like this.

[HazelGirl]

He isn't ignoring you. I guarantee it. He may want to wait to discuss it in person, but it's not because he's ignoring you. Has he ever ignored you in the past? Probably not. So I don't see how he would start now.

[Asiablue]

Well, in regards to the contact after retirement, he may be having a really good think about it, he might be delaying speaking to you about it until he has it all clear in his head.

The no response to your minor crisis is very annoying tho and not very fair. Maybe he is sick? You know there could be a ton of reasons for not getting back to you, you know feeling like he's now angry with you is a projection. Therapists deal with anger in a much more direct way, i think you'd know if he was angry.

[MASIMO]

Well, I finally spoke with my T about my mini crisis. But neither mentioned my asking for contact email. Frankly, I'm glad, I was not in the frame of mind to deal with what he had to say about that. I'm expecting rejection.

I'm on my way to my therapy session today, I will bring it up if he doesn't. I just feel sick about it right now. I'm not doing so great dealing with husband issues, but I do need to get this out in the open and dealt with. I have not cried over him for a couple of days.....So am I making progress grieving his retirement. I don't think so. This is such a huge thing for me, makes my heart ache, and it's still 6 months away.
So we have a lot of time to process all of this. I have these thoughts of cutting and running from him. Just thoughts, I will stay with him for as long as he is willing to see me and after if possible. I want to bring up the issue of referral at some point but I'm not ready to talk about seeing another therapist. It will hurt too much. Why did I have to fall for this guy?