How do you reconcile the reality presented by warm and fuzzy T with actual reality?

Mar 26, 2014 at 07:55 PM

I find this difficult at times. T can be warm and fuzzy, (they all can) and then you step outside the office of positivity and light and it's the big old bad wet dark, smelly cold world again.

sweepy62 · Mar 26, 2014 at 07:59 PM

Yep, its another damn dimension, when I leave her office, I always say, bye goinginto the real world, leaving fantasy land,

ShaggyChic_1201 · Mar 26, 2014 at 10:01 PM

I think (hope a lot) that we learn to bring some of their calmness and sunshine into our own dismal lives so that the world doesn't seem so harsh in comparison to T's office.

And if I'm wrong, please don't tell me

stopdog · 11:26 PM

I don't find the woman warm, fuzzy and cozy. For me - I escape from the appointment back into the safety of my real world.

RTerroni · Mar 26, 2014 at 10:36 PM

Exactly, in fact when I saw her walking down the hall at the place I go for Therapy (I was waiting to see my Psychiatrist) all she said was hi (although that was likely because there was a place she needed to get to).

Mar 26, 2014 at 11:11 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by ShaggyChic_1201

I think (hope a lot) that we learn to bring some of their calmness and sunshine into our own dismal lives so that the world doesn't seem so harsh in comparison to T's office.

And if I'm wrong, please don't tell me

I think we can do exactly that!! I have come to see that the therapy relationship between T and I during that 50 minutes each time is a model for the relationship that I have always wanted to have with myself - and it's taken a ton of hard work and even more patience on T's part but I am getting there.... most of the time I am at peace with who and what I am today. We're still working on those times when I'm not.... but... there IS light at the end of the proverbial tunnel!!

growlycat · Mar 26, 2014 at 11:24 PM

I try to take the T's with me as my own pocket riders to RL

feralkittymom · Mar 26, 2014 at 11:44 PM

I never felt this very much. Having the support of my T carried over outside of sessions, and session time was often spent mired in past horror, so the end of a session was often a relief. I rarely left a session feeling warm and fuzzy and positive. I felt supported and not alone.

brillskep · Mar 27, 2014 at 07:21 AM

Not all Ts are "warm and fuzzy". Certainly a good T won't be warm and fuzzy all the time.

Personally, I've reconciled the two worlds by becoming a warm fuzzy T myself - so I always have a warm fuzzy T wherever I go

I'm only half kidding. I really believe that, if you manage to take a different perspective about things from your T (or else where0 and bring that with you wherever you go and start being kinder to yourself, then the two worlds won't be so far apart anymore.

To me, these aren't two worlds. I feel good with my T most of the time. I feel badly in certain other contexts (or with my t on occasion). The feelings may be very different, but they're all mine.

Mar 27, 2014 at 08:01 AM

I would never call my T warm and fuzzy. He's this big, burly, outdoorsy man with a kind of tough exterior at times. That doesn't mean he isn't caring and empathetic and supportive. He's just not warm and fuzzy.

I leave my sessions okay about half the time; I wouldn't call it all sunshine and rainbows though. Sessions are intense, even the best of them really. I usually leave more contemplative and pensive than anything.

Jun 09, 2014 at 05:00 AM

Warm and fuzzy T or reality T? I can't decide which one she is, or maybe she is both?

Jun 09, 2014 at 06:01 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by stopdog

I don't find the woman warm, fuzzy and cozy. For me - I escape from the appointment back into the safety of my real world.

Yep i know what you mean.

HazelGirl · Jun 09, 2014 at 07:53 AM

I guess I don't really have this experience. I mean, sometimes I would rather stay there forever, but my current life isn't too bad. So I'm not going from warm and fuzzy to a horribly awful situation (most of the time).

kororain · Jun 09, 2014 at 10:37 AM

I realize this thread is old, but whatever...

Anyway, I don't find T to be warm or fuzzy. More like neutral. If anything, she has a tendancy to say the wrong thing at the wrong time.

I also don't find reality to be overly harsh or critical either. That's all me. I'm the one who's harsh and critical. So mostly, T is there to show me how to knock that **** off.

unaluna · Jun 09, 2014 at 10:46 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Illegal Toilet

I find this difficult at times. T can be warm and fuzzy, (they all can) and then you step outside the office of positivity and light and it's the big old bad wet dark, smelly cold world again.

That is what its like for me too. But perception is reality. What changes between the two hours? What destroys the safety you feel during t hour? How can you combat that, or just not let it happen? Replace a bad habit with a good one. Not easy, and its slow work, but whats the alternative?

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Anonymous33211 Guest Posts: n/a	Mar 26, 2014 at 07:55 PM #1 I find this difficult at times. T can be warm and fuzzy, (they all can) and then you step outside the office of positivity and light and it's the big old bad wet dark, smelly cold world again.
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sweepy62 Grand Magnate Member Since Sep 2011 Location: usa Posts: 3,615 12 483 hugs given	Mar 26, 2014 at 07:59 PM #2 Yep, its another damn dimension, when I leave her office, I always say, bye goinginto the real world, leaving fantasy land, __________________ Bipolar 1 Gad Ptsd BPD ZOLOFT 100 TOPAMAX 400 ABILIFY 10 SYNTHROID 137
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ShaggyChic_1201 Grand Member Member Since Mar 2011 Location: USA Posts: 770 13 1,187 hugs given	Mar 26, 2014 at 10:01 PM #3 I think (hope a lot) that we learn to bring some of their calmness and sunshine into our own dismal lives so that the world doesn't seem so harsh in comparison to T's office. And if I'm wrong, please don't tell me
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RTerroni Elder Member Since Sep 2013 Location: USA Posts: 5,751 10 2,136 hugs given	Mar 26, 2014 at 10:36 PM #5 Exactly, in fact when I saw her walking down the hall at the place I go for Therapy (I was waiting to see my Psychiatrist) all she said was hi (although that was likely because there was a place she needed to get to). __________________ COVID-19 Survivor- 4/26/2022
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growlycat Therapy Ninja Member Since Jan 2007 Location: How did I get here? Posts: 10,308 17 16.1k hugs given	Mar 26, 2014 at 11:24 PM #7 I try to take the T's with me as my own pocket riders to RL
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feralkittymom Grand Magnate Member Since Aug 2012 Location: yada Posts: 4,415 11 1,974 hugs given	Mar 26, 2014 at 11:44 PM #8 I never felt this very much. Having the support of my T carried over outside of sessions, and session time was often spent mired in past horror, so the end of a session was often a relief. I rarely left a session feeling warm and fuzzy and positive. I felt supported and not alone.
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Anonymous33211 Guest Posts: n/a	Jun 09, 2014 at 05:00 AM #11 Warm and fuzzy T or reality T? I can't decide which one she is, or maybe she is both?
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HazelGirl Elder Member Since Jan 2014 Location: USA Posts: 5,248 10 91 hugs given	Jun 09, 2014 at 07:53 AM #13 I guess I don't really have this experience. I mean, sometimes I would rather stay there forever, but my current life isn't too bad. So I'm not going from warm and fuzzy to a horribly awful situation (most of the time). __________________ HazelGirl PTSD, Depression, ADHD, Anxiety Propranolol 10mg as needed for anxiety, Wellbutrin XL 150mg
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kororain Member Member Since May 2014 Location: USA Posts: 409 10 154 hugs given	Jun 09, 2014 at 10:37 AM #14 I realize this thread is old, but whatever... Anyway, I don't find T to be warm or fuzzy. More like neutral. If anything, she has a tendancy to say the wrong thing at the wrong time. I also don't find reality to be overly harsh or critical either. That's all me. I'm the one who's harsh and critical. So mostly, T is there to show me how to knock that **** off.
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