Today I was wearing what they call a "cold shoulder" shirt, which is like half cami, half long sleeve shirt, made out of mostly lace. It has cut outs from collarbone between the straps and lower upper arms, which were exposing my tattoos. I don't usually walk around showing them because of the weather and my work dress code. But I wore this type of shirt today in session.

My therapist inquired about my tattoos, especially the more large one on one of my arms. He couldn't see the rest of it, cause the bottom half of the lace was covering it up. Right when my fingers went to lift it down so he could get a better view, he somehow ended up pulling it down for me, revealing the rest of my tattoo. It wasn't drawn out or anything, just a swift move.

He didn't touch my bare skin, just the strap. He just said "nice," and asked if I had any others. Then we resumed our regular session. The weird part is at that moment, I didn't think of it as anything because he's been starting to feel really "familiar" to me, like someone I've known for years.

I've always thought that after a client pretty much admits they have feelings/transference for them (which he is well aware of mine), would usually refrain from touch, so as to avoid giving the wrong idea.

I don't feel violated in any way at all. I just wonder how other people feel or would view this as? Do you feel it's inappropriate? For the record, we have never hugged or shaken hands.

“I’m good at loving books. I’m good at loving soft bed sheets. I’m good at loving coffees and teas. I am good at loving things that can’t love me back, that don’t have the power to leave. And maybe, that’s why I love them.”

[Auntie2014]

IMHO any touch in therapy between client or T is a condition where one asks permission first & every time except at a hand shake at first session. I also feel that each party has the right to refuse at anytime and the other party accepts that. End of Story.

[CantExplain]

If you're OK with it, so am I.

My t and i often touch and hug and hold hands. We are both just really touchy people and very huggy. It works well for us. Touch has been one of the most healing things for me. I was severly neglected as a child and only touched in bad ways. Having good, real, positive affection has done wonders for me,

[HazelGirl]

I would feel uncomfortable about it, but that's because I have problems with touch. I don't absolutely hate it, but all touch feels a little awkward to me, especially if I am not expecting it.

I think what is "normal" is unique to each relationship. If you are comfortable with it and don't feel any boundaries are infringed upon, then this is normal touch in your relationship with your T.

[feralkittymom]

I have to say it feels inappropriate to me because it wasn't therapeutic touch; it was touch to satisfy his curiosity about something which seems unrelated to therapy. It just seems odd that he wouldn't wait for you to reveal the tattoo.

And given that you've revealed feelings for him, it seems rather unwise on his part. Whether or not it means anything further, I couldn't say.