[EveningStar2632]

Hey guys:-)
Have you ever viewed your T's notes about you? Did seeing what they'd been writing down help you or make you feel worse? I was just wondering bc I feel like maybe if I saw what my pdoc wrote about me I would not like him anymore. That's a good thing though.:-)

[AllyIsHopeful]

I caught a glimpse of them one session when she left the room to meet with another client and I didn't feel any better or worse after reading it.

The notes were literally just a summary of what I was saying or short reminders of information I gave her.

[brillskep]

I haven't and don't want to. What he tells me about his assessment of me is enough.

The handful of times I've seen the write ups I've often wondered who exactly they were writing about. Sometimes they would twist information around, or add their own stuff in so that I wondered why I even needed to be in the room if they were going to make stuff up.

It annoyed me more than anything. It wouldn't even be so bad if it weren't for the fact that if someone you don't know reads that information, for whatever reason, they're going to take the psychiatrist's words as in stone and it could effect you negatively. I know this for a fact because it happened to someone once and it caused them to lose their benefits because of one tiny detail their T misinterpreted.

He reads them to me from time to time. They really aren't all that exciting honestly. Very objective, quick notations of what was discussed (no details) and/or particular insights I made (nothing I don't already know). Nothing in them that I wasn't already aware of anyway. Maybe a quarter to half of a page of phrases to jog his memory; that's really all they are. If you are looking for your T's "secret" ideas/feelings about you, you won't find them there.

I'd be more interested in my pdoc's notes as they are much more extensive actually strangely enough, but I am certain they also are just very factual, objective notations rather than deep, thoughtful insights.

You have to remember that anything on paper is usually very "professional" and is written knowing it has to stand up to scrutiny if requested.

[HazelGirl]

In America, you can ask for your notes to read, and as long as your T doesn't believe seeing them will hurt you, they are required by law to hand them over. If they do believe it would be detrimental to your mental health to see certain parts, they are legally required to edit them and get them to you in a timely manner.

Originally Posted by EveningStar2632

Hey guys:-)
Have you ever viewed your T's notes about you? Did seeing what they'd been writing down help you or make you feel worse? I was just wondering bc I feel like maybe if I saw what my pdoc wrote about me I would not like him anymore. That's a good thing though.:-)

Yes, I used to read through them in session with him from time to time. It didn't make me feel worse. It actually helped me feel connected to him. He took brief notes though.

[Victoria'smom]

I feel any thing written is hers. Anything in my file is mine.

[owlpride]

I once requested my college medical records, which included my counseling files.

Every counseling session was recorded on a standard form, with 4 'interesting' sections: an "objective" summary of what happened, the counselor's interpretation of what happened, a mental status exam, and a 5-axis DSM-IV diagnosis.

It was originally difficult for me to read the files because each sentence brought back a painful or emberassing memory, about the conselling session itself or the content that was being discussed. It took me about a month to read notes from (only) about a dozen sessions.

After those initial reactions, I got angry at the counselors because there were so many objective errors and distortions in those files. "3 step siblings" turned into "2 half-siblings," they got my country of origin wrong, etc. My DSM diagnosis changed every single week. (PTSD one week, depression the next, generalized anxiety the week after that, social phobia, adjustment disorder, etc)

The mental status exam notes seemed to reflect more the picture that the counselor was trying to convey than anything about me. For example, in the week before my hospitalization, my clothing was described as "worn-out." After my hospitalization, the same counselor described me as "neatly dressed" - even though I was wearing the exact same things.

I was even more hurt by the counselor's subjective interpretations, which were completely off most of the time. For example, when I got angry at the counselor and confrontational because I felt completely misunderstood, he noted that "I recovered additional memories in the safety of the therapeutic relationship." This was in our second and last session because I really didn't like the dude. Safety my ***.

So much for my college counseling records. I have never seen my current T's (in private practice) records. He claims that he keeps them extremely short, so that no one who wasn't physically present in the room could make sense of them. Once I made him read his notes because he didn't remember what had happened the week before - turned out that his notes were so cryptic that they weren't even enough to jog his own memory without additional reminders/details from me.

[Raging Quiet]

M t doesn't keep notes: just things I write or draw.

[unlockingsanity]

I got a copy of my notes from one therapist.

For me, it caused more heartache than anything. Imagine finding out that your therapist questions their ability to help you, in their notes and not from their lips. That, amongst other horrifying things that you wish you could un-remember.

[purplemystery]

I have considered asking my T to read her notes about me since she mentioned them to me once before, but I'm not sure if I will yet.

[junkDNA]

T offered for me to read his after session notes but i declined. he says they are just about how i am doing and things we talked about and any homework assignments.

he has a file cabinent of everything ive given him including emails and stuff

[Focus62]

Originally Posted by owlpride

I once requested my college medical records, which included my counseling files.

Every counseling session was recorded on a standard form, with 4 'interesting' sections: an "objective" summary of what happened, the counselor's interpretation of what happened, a mental status exam, and a 5-axis DSM-IV diagnosis.

It was originally difficult for me to read the files because each sentence brought back a painful or emberassing memory, about the conselling session itself or the content that was being discussed. It took me about a month to read notes from (only) about a dozen sessions.

After those initial reactions, I got angry at the counselors because there were so many objective errors and distortions in those files. "3 step siblings" turned into "2 half-siblings," they got my country of origin wrong, etc. My DSM diagnosis changed every single week. (PTSD one week, depression the next, generalized anxiety the week after that, social phobia, adjustment disorder, etc)

The mental status exam notes seemed to reflect more the picture that the counselor was trying to convey than anything about me. For example, in the week before my hospitalization, my clothing was described as "worn-out." After my hospitalization, the same counselor described me as "neatly dressed" - even though I was wearing the exact same things.

I was even more hurt by the counselor's subjective interpretations, which were completely off most of the time. For example, when I got angry at the counselor and confrontational because I felt completely misunderstood, he noted that "I recovered additional memories in the safety of the therapeutic relationship." This was in our second and last session because I really didn't like the dude. Safety my ***.

So much for my college counseling records. I have never seen my current T's (in private practice) records. He claims that he keeps them extremely short, so that no one who wasn't physically present in the room could make sense of them. Once I made him read his notes because he didn't remember what had happened the week before - turned out that his notes were so cryptic that they weren't even enough to jog his own memory without additional reminders/details from me.

Thanks for sharing this. I requested my medical records earlier this year so I have most of my T's notes in a big envelope in my closet, she is also a college T. I am still seeing her though, but I am graduating in spring so this is it for me. I haven't read them yet for fear that I will end up learning something about her thoughts on me that I don't want to know, and I don't want to ruin our relationship right now because it's good. It's taking a lot of self-restraint from me though because I'm incredibly curious what it is they take down after a session. I don't think her notes will have sections like that but I am interested to know if they are similar... I plan to open them after our last session (and hopefully not ruin any of my thoughts on her).

[elliemay]

Nope, and I would never read them. Sounds like a recipe for disaster to me.

The reports I have read have been bad enough (as in cold, clinical, sometimes outright wrong, everything is pathologized etc...)

Nope, not gonna happen in my world.

[Mactastic]

In my very first session my T told me his policy is to allow any patient to see their notes at any time. Several months later and I was curious so I asked if anyone had ever wanted to read them. He said no one in his career had ever asked. For some reason that took away a lot of my interest, knowing no one had ever asked. He says they're very "industrial" and only serve to jog his memory. I believe him. I'm still curious but I don't think it's worth asking. Even upon termination I don't think I want to read them, it will only leave me with more questions somehow.

[Bill3]

I plan to open them after our last session (and hopefully not ruin any of my thoughts on her).

I worried when I read this. If you were to find something upsetting, surprising, inaccurate, you would not then have an opportunity to discuss what you found with T. What if you were to read them a few sessions before termination?

[melania]

I took notes from my therapist,he didn't let me. I looked into-there were nothing special. I don't remember anything.
Thanks you remind me I want to look at my pdoc's notes I don't know if he let me but I want to read it.

[MASIMO]

My T gives me his notes from the previous session every week.
He says I'm the only one who has requested them. I usually dont
read them in our session but after I'm home. They are never upsetting,
very validating, and generally helpful. I could survive without them,
but I find it really interesting to read how he sees me and it helps me
to track my progress or lack thereof on a regular basis. I think it's a
good thing....depending on your Therapist. I think he is especially careful
about what he says as he knows I will be reading them.

[PeeJay]

Reading the notes have been some of the most helpful part of my therapy. I like getting an outsider's perspective.

I also find it interesting to note what is noted in the files. The therapist even has codes to mark down whether or not I am appropriately groomed. I found that one interesting.

[monkeybrains21]

I'm curious to what my Ts notes say. I can imagine some such as how sometimes it's hard for her to know if I'm dangerous or just venting. I just want to know what she personally thinks of everything I've said. I get very detached when I read things about me or things I've written. Almost like I didn't write them and I have no attachments to it. Same with stuff about me. I read my medical history as if it was do done else's. Almost in a clinical way.