[growlithing]

Hey guys,

LCM is pissed at my exTT. So pissed that she wants to report exTT to the board of ethics or whatever it is called. I told her I think that might be a little extreme. She said she disagrees and thinks that reporting her would be just.

Here's the situation. I met TT last October. The hospital where I was inpatient connected me with her. For about 4 sessions, we did some DBT but I was having trouble doing DBT on a one on one level. She decided what I really need is to process trauma so in January, we started trauma work. It didn't really happen though because LCM was concerned that I wasn't ready to do it. TT respected LCM's opinion on that and stopped all trauma work until she talked to LCM and they talked and came up with a plan. They played phone tag for a month. TT still wanted to do trauma work with me and kinda seemed to try and convince me to more forward with it, but I said I really wanted them to talk.

Then the first week of March, TT completely out of the blue told me she was leaving in a week. There was no warning whatsoever. Just "this is the last week I'll be here". She offered me a closure session. I declined.

LCM thinks that it was unethical for her to terminate so suddenly and even more unethical to try to start trauma work with me, knowing that she was going to leave without telling me anything. And then she thinks it is even worse that TT told me she would refer me to a new therapist and left me waiting for over two months, thinking that a new T would call me. It's pretty clear now that she didn't make any referrals at all.

So what do you guys think? Is LCM right in wanting to report her?

[stopdog]

I say cut your losses and move on without worrying what the old therapist did or did not do.

[growlithing]

Originally Posted by stopdog

I say cut your losses and move on without worrying what the old therapist did or did not do.

That's kinda my attitude about it. LCM is far more upset about it than I am

I don't think it would get anywhere. I do think it was unethical though. People have told me what therapist did to me was unethical and I even printed off forms to report him, but after a lot of research figured it probably wouldn't be worth what it might do to me in the long run.

Unless I've missed it, have you mentioned where the therapist had to go? Did she share how much notice she had before this all happened? I just don't remember hearing those details.

[growlithing]

Originally Posted by 1914sierra

Unless I've missed it, have you mentioned where the therapist had to go? Did she share how much notice she had before this all happened? I just don't remember hearing those details.

No she didn't tell me that. She might have told LCM. I'm not sure.

[growlithing]

She didn't say it was unexpected or anything

So, what was the situation? She may have not been able to share the details, so it is possible the suddenness of the situation was out of her control. Personally, I would move on. It isn't like you had particularly bonded with her. In fact, you were very resistant to her so it was probably all for the best to move on and look for a better match.

[ListenMoreTalkLess]

Termination because the T is leaving her job is totally different than anything else. Isn't she part of a practice and you were referred back to the practice? Exactly what else could she do?

[growlithing]

I don't think she quit practice. She was working out of two clinics. She dropped the clinic I was in. I'm assuming she moved to the other clinic to work full time there.

[BlessedRhiannon]

I think it may not have been the most compassionate decision on your TT's part, but I don't think it was necessarily unethical.

I had something similar happen about 10 years ago, with my first therapist. I had just started to trust her and really talk about some difficult issues, and then she decided to close down her practice. She basically gave me two weeks notice and referred me to a T in another practice. It hurt...a lot. It took me a long time to trust another T not to abandon me when we started to get to the hard stuff. I'm sure it wasn't a snap decision to close her practice, but she didn't give much notice about it. I've talked about this with my current T, and she's never indicated that she felt it was unethical behavior. Unwise and insensitive, yes; unethical, no.

[growlithing]

Originally Posted by 1914sierra

So, what was the situation? She may have not been able to share the details, so it is possible the suddenness of the situation was out of her control. Personally, I would move on. It isn't like you had particularly bonded with her. In fact, you were very resistant to her so it was probably all for the best to move on and look for a better match.

I told LCM to do what she wants so long as she doesn't get me involved with it because I don't care. I'm just curious if you guys think she is overreacting

Unless she has an inside scoop the rest of us don't know of, yes, she seems to be overreacting a bit. Was it the best of circumstances? No, but it doesn't at this point seem to be unethical. Hard to tell really.

[sweepy62]

I think your lc should probably focus on helping you getting a referral to a new tt if that's what you want and are willing to work through.

Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

[sunrise]

If the therapist works for an agency or company, it may be out of their hands how and when to terminate. They may be prohibited from telling the client in advance, giving any details about where they will be going next, why they are leaving, etc.

How can anyone know if it's unethical without knowing the whole story? If her departure was unexpected, I'm not sure how it could be unethical. She could have had a nervous breakdown for all we know...

It's not necessarily rational, so it seems LCM is looking at this from an emotional perspective. I get the impression she is being angry for you, in part to make up for your lack of anger.

Maybe you are just not showing it here, but I don't sense any anger from you over this. If a person could assess affect online, you seem really 'flat'. Anger would have an energizing feel.

[growlithing]

Originally Posted by skies

How can anyone know if it's unethical without knowing the whole story? If her departure was unexpected, I'm not sure how it could be unethical. She could have had a nervous breakdown for all we know...

It's not necessarily rational, so it seems LCM is looking at this from an emotional perspective. I get the impression she is being angry for you, in part to make up for your lack of anger.

Maybe you are just not showing it here, but I don't sense any anger from you over this. If a person could assess affect online, you seem really 'flat'. Anger would have an energizing feel.

Ha no. If I were angry, you wouldn't have to ask if I am angry. I'm not mad. LCM could be angry for me but she could also be angry on her own too because she played phone tag with this woman for a long time, kept hoping she would contribute to my care in a significant way, and it never happened and when she finally talked to her, TT said "don't tell Growlithing but I'm leaving next week". She wasted her time and energy and then left LCM a new project of finding a new TT after exTT said she would find someone and didn't. I also feel like LCM would have asked her why she was leaving so she might know.

That's cool she is angry about it. I just wish you'd process some anger too. That kind of energy can be misdirected inward as self-destructive behavior.

[growlycat]

LCM's time and energy is best spent finding you a new TT.

[Nammu]

I'm actually on the side of the LCM, she is willing to report this let her. As long as T and Pdocs are allowed to do things that can negatively impact the future of a clients mental health they will continue to do so. If they think they will get reported they will think more ethically about the impact their actions have on the clients. A T or Pdoc just doesn't up and quit one practice, they do have to plan it out in more than two weeks. It is their business and their livelihood.

Most T's are ethical and would have made sure to let you know in advance and would have made sure the referral was made by giving both the new T and you contact info. Ts I have worked with would have let their clients know a month or more about any days they would be gone, whether it was vacation, or conventions. Quitting would have been planed in advance.

What if your TT did refer, and the ball was dropped by someone else? What if she didn't know she was leaving? My concern is that LCM will report TT, and she herself may get implicated in not following up with if she is advocating for you, and also, if there was no consensus between the both of them regarding your care. Let sleeping dogs lie, and think about asking LCM to help you find a trauma therapist.

[msxyz]

A sudden termination epsecially without a referral is considered unethical by professional standards so I can understand why she wants to report your ex therapist since it might prevent from other clients suffering the same fate as you and those clients might be more fragile and suffer greatly, unnecessarily.

I wouldn't want my therapist to drag me into a proceeding that would most likely be stressful and yield no direct benefit to me if I wasn't whole-heartedly behind the idea. THAT seems more unethical than a termination that I apparently have no details about to start with.

[growlithing]

Originally Posted by skies

That's cool she is angry about it. I just wish you'd process some anger too. That kind of energy can be misdirected inward as self-destructive behavior.

Just because I'm not angry about it doesn't mean that I was always not angry about it or that I'm suppressing anger. I'm pretty comfortable with anger. Anger and misery are the two emotions I am most comfortable expressing and processing. The others... not so much.

I don't have to have any particular emotional reaction to any event. People are different and experience different emotions.

[growlithing]

Originally Posted by Goingtogetthere

What if your TT did refer, and the ball was dropped by someone else? What if she didn't know she was leaving? My concern is that LCM will report TT, and she herself may get implicated in not following up with if she is advocating for you, and also, if there was no consensus between the both of them regarding your care. Let sleeping dogs lie, and think about asking LCM to help you find a trauma therapist.

She is in the process of finding a new trauma therapist. I'm having trouble being game to try another therapist after TT just left like that. Why would I open up to someone else who could just up and leave randomly like that? I was distrusting before and now I'm even worse. Maybe that's part of the reason why LCM is so upset about this.

I don't think LCM will actually do anything. I think she just got heated and said something. Well, I don't know. Whatever she does, I hope she doesn't do anything that will get me involved. I don't think she'd do anything that would involve me.