[HazelGirl]

I have an appointment today with my T, and I am pretty nervous. I don't really have a lot to talk about, but we may continue our conversation from last week, and that's intimidating, even though she has been so gentle with it all.

[someone321]

I'll pocket ride for you
I hope that it will go okay and that after the session you will feel calm and relaxed - good luck

[liveinspired]

I bet that way too every week before therapy that day. I hope that everything goes well and that you feel relief.

[Leah123]

Sometimes it helps me a bit to play the "what's the worst that could happen game" so I can stop having generalized worries and make them nice and specific, which often equates with easier to disregard as unreasonable.

[HazelGirl]

Worst that could happen? I shut down like I did last week and end up spending most of the appointment silent again, thereby wasting my time and delaying talking about things even more. I can't control whether that happens, either, because I get paralyzed and I can't force myself to speak even if I try. It's like my throat and voice stop working and I feel all alone in how I'm feeling. I end up having thoughts flying through my head and I can't tell her that I am in distress. We have talked about maybe creating a body signal for me (like raising my hand or something) to indicate when it's happening, but I don't know that I can move, either. I end up feeling like I need to sit perfectly still, not move, not say a word, don't draw attention to myself, don't say or do anything.

[someone321]

Do you think that you could maybe close your eyes then? If it's possible, at the beginning of the session you could tell your T that if it's happening as you cannot tell her nor move, you'd just close your eyes... Or what i do (I somehow wouldn't feel comfortable with closing my eyes in front of someone), I do this: - so i roll my eyes and my T immediately sees that and reacts - that works perfectly for me...