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emptyspace
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Default Jul 04, 2014 at 02:04 PM
  #1
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How did/do you know your therapy was working?

What signs in your life showed that therapy was working?
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Default Jul 04, 2014 at 02:13 PM
  #2
Life started moving in the direction I wanted it to.

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Default Jul 04, 2014 at 02:20 PM
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My thinking started being clearer.
I started living my life again.
My symptoms of depression, etc. started reducing.
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Default Jul 04, 2014 at 02:26 PM
  #4
It has not worked for me in the usual sense. I found a way to make the woman useful, but it is not, from what I can tell, because therapy is working. I did not go because my life was not working or because I wanted to change anything about my relationships - they were fine with me how they were.

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Default Jul 04, 2014 at 02:31 PM
  #5
The fact that I was feeling differently about things which used to be issues and the moment I did something I had been told all my life I couldn't and shouldn't do (it was something good for me ... I did something for myself in spite of the fears and myths in my family of origin).
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Default Jul 04, 2014 at 03:15 PM
  #6
I am alive, not in a hospital, and not having multiple daily panic attack!!

I still deal with issues, but I have to say my symptoms of lessened over time! As well as having "light bulb" type moments of clarity, and understanding why this behavior developed because of this situation.

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Default Jul 04, 2014 at 03:17 PM
  #7
I can tell by my interactions with other people. How i act with them. I used to be sooooo much more needy and desperate for attention. I happened to ride the bus yesterday with a female friend/coworker from over ten years ago, and a young male student i met when i was riding to my stroke-related appointments two years ago. I thought about mentioning my stroke to my ladyfriend, but i have fully recovered so didnt really see the need. The young man, though - im pretty sure he spilled the beans to her as soon as i got off the bus! He had a need to be seen by her, to be seen as important - even tho he had just met her minutes before. We are both old enough to be his grandmother, btw. I OTOH was on my way to my t's to be SEEN, so i was pretty calm and self-contained. But yeah, ten years ago i was just like him (that female friend would tell you). And old enough even then to be his granny, so i am not bragging, just saying this is how i know im different now. When i told my t about the incident, i said, "so it was worth all the torture." And he's like really? Its been torture? I was like, well yeah. Theres a lot of stuff.
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Default Jul 04, 2014 at 03:35 PM
  #8
I don't want to die the minute I wake up. Only the second minute now

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When a child’s emotional needs are not met and a child is repeatedly hurt and abused, this deeply and profoundly affects the child’s development. Wanting those unmet childhood needs in adulthood. Looking for safety, protection, being cherished and loved can often be normal unmet needs in childhood, and the survivor searches for these in other adults. This can be where survivors search for mother and father figures. Transference issues in counseling can occur and this is normal for childhood abuse survivors.
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Default Jul 04, 2014 at 03:51 PM
  #9
I have been able to do a LOT more than i used to, i am braver and more confidant, I am able to handle things in my life so much better, i have good relationships now, i can set boundaries
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Default Jul 04, 2014 at 03:55 PM
  #10
My T is my superficial only friend that I see every 3 weeks.
She asks whats my goal?
I say "to find a reason to live, rather than find a reason to die"
I'm still here, so something is working, I reckon.
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Default Jul 04, 2014 at 04:08 PM
  #11
Well, I'm not actively SUI, don't do SI and other self-destructive behaviors, am back at school- finally getting my degree, able to deal with male authority figures, med free... most days I consider this a proof therapy's working. And then there are days (well, nights mostly) when I think it's just taking so long that I'll die before I'm healed- yeah, I'm having one of those nights right now, sorry to be such a downer.
Back to your question- sure it's working but man, so very slowly...
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Default Jul 04, 2014 at 04:15 PM
  #12
I haven't self-injured in nearly a decade.

I'm not depressed. I know how to catch incipient depression early, and what to do to keep it from moving in and planting its butt on my mental couch.

I no longer have flashbacks, intrusive memories, or regular nightmares, and very rarely have anxiety attacks.

I am better able to communicate in my relationships, I have better boundaries and am comfortable holding my boundaries.

I've got a lot of work left to do; I'm actively challenging my unresolved attachment pattern in therapy, and that is certainly causing some bleed-over waves in my daily life, but I'm learning a lot about why I react the way I do in relationships.

Progress happens gradually. It's only looking back I can see just how much I have done, and people who have known me the whole time see it and affirm it, too.
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Default Jul 04, 2014 at 04:48 PM
  #13
Quote:
Originally Posted by CameraObscura View Post
I am better able to communicate in my relationships, I have better boundaries and am comfortable holding my boundaries.
This. Also, I'm more aware of what I am and am not responsible for in terms of other people's actions and feelings.

I'm starting to be able to recognise and name my own negative emotions and be with them instead of pushing them away.

I don't feel despair all the time like I used to.
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Default Jul 04, 2014 at 04:59 PM
  #14
I'm not sure /: but my boss at work told me she noticed that I'm different (unsolicited and she doesn't know I'm in therapy). She couldn't quite pinpoint it, but said it seemed like I was more positive or more content or something like that.....that's big for me. Work is one of those things I tend to get fixated on as an external blame shifter.
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Default Jul 04, 2014 at 05:31 PM
  #15
I don't cry after every session anymore and I am doing things that I was unable to even contemplate doing before I started therapy.
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iheartjacques
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Default Jul 05, 2014 at 03:28 AM
  #16
Stopdog, are you in therapy because you have to? I just wondered if you were a psych student in training where they have to do x number of hours under supervision before they're qualified.
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Default Jul 05, 2014 at 03:30 AM
  #17
Therapy worked when I stopped wanting to die and started to feel like I could tackle my stuff and everything going on around me.
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stopdog
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Default Jul 05, 2014 at 09:03 AM
  #18
Quote:
Originally Posted by iheartjacques View Post
Stopdog, are you in therapy because you have to? I just wondered if you were a psych student in training where they have to do x number of hours under supervision before they're qualified.
No, I do not have to be seeing a therapist. I am a lawyer and college prof.

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Default Jul 05, 2014 at 12:41 PM
  #19
The first time I realized I was happy for no reason, that it was coming from inside me - that was when I knew that my third try at therapy was working. Since then other things like getting a new job that I've had for over a year and a half now, going on a year ago I started making friends outside of work which I'd never done in my entire adult life, friends with similar spiritual interests, and I began setting healthy boundaries with my FOO on the rare occasions I see any of them.
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Default Jul 05, 2014 at 12:46 PM
  #20
I have a ways to go but my social life picked up. It's still difficult for me to "do people" but I'm more gentle with myself. I can look people in the eye a bit longer and it's not as hard for me to talk about myself (this used to pain me.) the voice in my head that bashes me and degrades me is a bit quieter.

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