[healed84]

T recently moved his practice.. So, I am dealing with the new office thing. One of the things that I noticed right away, is that he didn't put the clock up that was in the last office. He had a wall clock hanging on the opposite wall from where I sit so, patients could see the time. I went through the first session looking for a clock to look at, and it just really bothered me. I am not usually the one to watch the time while in session, but it was nice to glance up and see. So, I mentioned it to him, he said that it is actually sitting over in the corner and he thought he would put it up the next day.

I show up on Friday two weeks later, and the clock is not up. I ignore it.. and half way through the session in the midst of something else, I blurt out.. You didn't put your clock up!!!! He said, oh no, I didn't.. I told you I would last time didn't I? I said yes. Then, he said.. Well I am sorry.

I can't stop thinking about the stupid clock. How hard is it to put a damn clock up on a damn wall? And why the hell, do I care so much?

[HazelGirl]

I hope you're not offended that I giggled a little. I do understand the fact that something so small can bother you so much. I'm not sure why it bothers you (control?) but it is a funny thing to freak out about

[glok]

Hello, healed84. Why do you think you care so much?

[healed84]

It's ok.. I laugh at myself I really don't understand why it bothers me so much!!

[kororain]

I would totally call him on that too. I always notice things like that with friends/people I'm comfortable with, and call them on it. Then the fact he said he would and didn't. Argh!

Take a small hammer and a nail with you to your next appointment. 30 seconds and you'll have your clock (and probably a good laugh with your T).

[healed84]

Originally Posted by 1914sierra

Take a small hammer and a nail with you to your next appointment. 30 seconds and you'll have your clock (and probably a good laugh with your T).

LOL h suggested that to me as well.. I have to say, I have considered doing that!!

[musinglizzy]

funny..... at my last appt, the blinds on the side of the window I can see out were shut. It wasn't the sun, because I'm there the same time of day every session. But I have a focus point out that window and she knows it, and I flat out asked her if it was because of that that the blinds were closed. She laughed, said no, and opened the blinds. I told her it really wasn't a big deal, just something I noticed. I had my focal point back.

I can see the clock if I turn my head in an obvious way, but I don't because I think it's rude. But at the same time, it would be nice to know when we're nearing the end of a session, as the time flies by. Also at my last session, I was talking about something very emotional for me....and look up at the clock and say "you've GOT to be kidding me!" Time was up, and I felt like I just got there. Probably should look at the clock to keep an eye on how much time I have left, but I find it rude. I notice her glance here and there.

[browncat]

Originally Posted by healed84

T recently moved his practice.. So, I am dealing with the new office thing. One of the things that I noticed right away, is that he didn't put the clock up that was in the last office. He had a wall clock hanging on the opposite wall from where I sit so, patients could see the time. I went through the first session looking for a clock to look at, and it just really bothered me. I am not usually the one to watch the time while in session, but it was nice to glance up and see. So, I mentioned it to him, he said that it is actually sitting over in the corner and he thought he would put it up the next day.

I show up on Friday two weeks later, and the clock is not up. I ignore it.. and half way through the session in the midst of something else, I blurt out.. You didn't put your clock up!!!! He said, oh no, I didn't.. I told you I would last time didn't I? I said yes. Then, he said.. Well I am sorry.

I can't stop thinking about the stupid clock. How hard is it to put a damn clock up on a damn wall? And why the hell, do I care so much?

LoL, I can totally relate to that! I am a clock watcher, and that would bug me. Not that it's my job, but for some reason I like to know how much time I have. I am usually the one to say, same time next week? I like to end my own sessions ! I wear a watch

[SoupDragon]

My T changed his carpet and that really wobbled me for weeks. It is funny what we "attach" ourselves to in those sessions.

[stopdog]

I wear a watch too. But I have been known to get out cell phone or place watch on my knee if the woman's clock has been turned so I can't see it. For some reason that annoys her so much, she always leans over and moves her clock to where I can see it.

[sweepy62]

Its funny how small simple things can affect us, my t has a clock across from us, and its funny because if it was not there anymore, I would freak , because I look at it, I think for me its a sense of control over the session. She looks at it, its funny because we asked each other the same question as to why we look at the clock alot, I asked her, and she said,I wish we had more time to talk, I look at it because I dont want to stay on this subject too long and have you leave overwhelmed, lol.

[stopdog]

The thing for me is to make sure I am not dependent on the woman or her stuff. It is irksome when her clock is skewed the wrong way, but I can provide my own remedy.

Half way through my first session I realized there wasn't a clock I could see ...I must of sort of got panicky and started looking around because she asked what I was looking for... We discussed why I wanted to be able to see a clock and I said I wanted warning about sessions being close to over.... She didn't turn the clock so I could see it but she did give me a warning when it was 10 minutes prior to end...

I realize I could bring a watch etc....but I've decided to challenge myself and give up that little bit of control.... For now

[ThisWayOut]

I like to see the clock because I like to know how much time I have left. With this T, I use it to gauge if I should change the topic now to finally get to what I need to say/show her, or if I should wait tillt he next week. I also use it to gauge how deeply I can get into a subject before time is up. My last T did not have a clock in the office, and we almost always ran over-time. It never bothered me, unless we were on a really uncomfortable topic and I wanted to be able to bolt from his office. I always have my phone with me, so I can check the time as needed.

[healed84]

Just an update.. NO CLOCK YET!!!

I mentioned to T that the clock wasn't up as I was walking out the door.. he laughed and said, I will have it up next week. Apparently he is the one that doesn't want the clock up!!

If I don't have a clock staring at me, always forget to look at what time it is when we start, therefore can't check my time periodically through the session. No to mention, it would be something familiar that I am used to looking at up in his new office!!

[Victoria'smom]

My t has a clock that she can see chair A & B you can't see the clock chair C you have to turn away from her to see the clock. I sit in chair C.

[Wysteria]

I too like to watch the clock or my watch every once in a while...thus not so blind sided by the end of a session and try not to door knob him which hurts me and him...more me because then I leave feeling overly raw and exposed. Sometimes like the others said, we may have 20 min left and I'm ready to bolt, and since I have NO poker face whatsoever, my T normally sees the glance and grimace and comments...lol. I also go by the door tone that sounds when people come and go. Sometimes I think our time must be up because I hear the front door, and I jerk. T knows and says, no we have plenty of time...

I see another T part time and she thinks it is ONLY her responsibility to watch the clock. I seem odd to her that I watch my time or have an inner clock that let's me know it's close....sometimes it seems to kind of annoy her.

I think it is rude to just blithely not care that I'm running into someone else's appt time. I know my time with T is precious and I don't like it when someone else keeps him overlong.. It is a partnership and up to both of us to be considerate of one another...it doesn't always happen that way..and sometimes you can't help that big stuff comes up at the end...but we try. That's all we can do.

Yes, I always reposition things to where they are "supposed" to be if someone else has moved them...lol Sometimes I move the vases around just to see if someone else will move them back during the week..

I know...bad Wysteria!! :rolleyes:

[PeeJay]

I check the time on my cell phone, while in session.

I think you are upset, OP, because he said he'd put it there and he forgot! Not following through on one's promises always irks me. Particularly with therapists because my inclination is not to trust anything they say to begin with. But I want to be proven wrong.

[tinyrabbit]

This thread has made me realise something.

I wear a watch but I never ever look at it in my session. I always look at T's wall clock even if I have to turn around to do it. Weird...

[tinyrabbit]

Also, it makes total sense that this is bothering you. I don't think it's really about the clock. Your T said he would do something and didn't. It shouldn't be your job to remind him. And if he doesn't want to do it he should be upfront about it.

[precaryous]

I hate T's clock...it's turned away from me, too.
I'm going to get my cell phone out.

In two friggin' weeks!

[stopdog]

Time is not the thing I am willing to let the therapist control.

[iheartjacques]

Some T's had clocks, some didn't. I like to know when we are nearly done. I hate it when they say "we just about out if time, so I'll see you next week". Current t takes off his digital watch and has it in front of him while he's taking notes. There's a little clock in the bookshelf facing me. I watch it a lot. Except when I'm upset. Or listening to him.

[someone321]

My T has one clock for her and one for the client and we have already discussed them few times... One thing is that sometimes the client clock is turned so that I cannot see the time, t annoys me but I use then my own watch. However, I mentioned it once, and my T said that she never turns the clock away from the client but sometimes the cleaning lady does it as she thinks that the clock should face T when she sits at her desk, and if noone tells T about it sometimes she might not realize it for few hours or even days...
Another thing is that whenever I see that time is up, my T says that according to her clock there are still 2-3 minutes and that she doesn't understand them (clocks) because they both are set based on the satellite but they are still not synchronized and it is not possible to synchronize them manually. T has said that she's already thought about switching the clocks before my sessions but she didn't do that