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Anonymous100330
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Default Oct 12, 2014 at 02:52 PM
  #1
I've gotten a referral to a therapist that, after doing some digging, appears to practice Internal Family Systems. I read up on it, and I'm not so sure I could handle this approach.

Does anyone have experience with this--good or bad? I'd really love to hear from people who have done this (not too interested in links).
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MoxieDoxie
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Default Oct 12, 2014 at 04:37 PM
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Yes, It is the one therapy technique that has helped me because I can learn use the technique at home when I become triggered. I learn about each part(or each mood/personality) and understand why it is active and how to deactivate it. It has its limits but it can reduce your symptoms significantly. Give it a chance.

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When a child’s emotional needs are not met and a child is repeatedly hurt and abused, this deeply and profoundly affects the child’s development. Wanting those unmet childhood needs in adulthood. Looking for safety, protection, being cherished and loved can often be normal unmet needs in childhood, and the survivor searches for these in other adults. This can be where survivors search for mother and father figures. Transference issues in counseling can occur and this is normal for childhood abuse survivors.
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Default Oct 12, 2014 at 04:40 PM
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Thanks Moxie. Did you find it weird at first?
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Default Oct 12, 2014 at 08:34 PM
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Not weird.....silly. I was dying laughing inside and cynical. However, since I was in a world of hurt, so much psychological pain that I had to get past that and allow myself to trust T and his knowledge and skill.

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When a child’s emotional needs are not met and a child is repeatedly hurt and abused, this deeply and profoundly affects the child’s development. Wanting those unmet childhood needs in adulthood. Looking for safety, protection, being cherished and loved can often be normal unmet needs in childhood, and the survivor searches for these in other adults. This can be where survivors search for mother and father figures. Transference issues in counseling can occur and this is normal for childhood abuse survivors.
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Default Oct 15, 2014 at 05:09 AM
  #5
http://www.selfleade
rship.org/about-internal-family-systems.html
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Default Oct 15, 2014 at 05:10 AM
  #6
Sorry you weren't interested in links, I had to post it for anyone else who wants to know what it is. Is it for people with DID?
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Thanks for this!
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Default Oct 15, 2014 at 02:41 PM
  #7
This approach to my psyche has helped me.

I don't let the therapist talk to my parts but I do talk to the therapist about my parts and what they think. It's weird and at first, I was highly skeptical.

But, it's not only for people with DID. It's for anyone.

Really, it's just a language to help you understand why parts of yourself can have such opposing ideas. As in, "part of me wants to exercise," and, "part of me wants to sit down and eat potato chips."

There are parts of you that might want to be protective of your heart (good to have!) and parts of you that want to be close to others (also good to have!)

For me, IFS really just gives me a language and vocabulary to explain to my therapist what is going on inside. I don't let the therapist talk to all of the parts directly. She tried and the parts wouldn't do it.

I swear, I had this little voice inside saying, "You can't trust her!" and another voice saying, "She's here to help. We have to do SOMETHING, or we're going to be depressed forever."

It's been a relief to talk about parts. I was also crying at times and I couldn't understand why, and so now we just generally say, "that was an exiled part that needs attention."

My life has dramatically improved.

IFS has been one of the most useful interventions my therapist has deployed for treating trauma and helping me to feel whole and less fearful about the world. Every other intervention my therapist suggested scared me.
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Default Oct 15, 2014 at 03:03 PM
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Thanks, PeeJay. It's good to know your therapist doesn't talk to parts of you. I just don't think I could do that. As it is, the whole thing feels counterintuitive--almost encouraging fragmentation--so it helps to hear how people have benefited from it.

iheart: I don't think it has anything to do with DID. Others can correct me if I'm wrong.
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Thanks for this!
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