[PaulaS]

I´m seeking therapy mostly out of issues that doesn´t relate to sex and I don´t intend to speak with a T about the more physical things about it but as I´ve never been in a relationship is unevitable to talk about it.

I´m not looking for a sex therapist in any way but a T who´s willing to discuss the underlying patterns around not having sex. And again, it´s nothing physically wrong that I need to explore or discuss.

To me it´s too embarrasing to even bring it up before I´ve established some kind of relationship to a new T, that is I don´t want to ask at the first session when I don´t know if I will continue seeing this T again.

I even feel it´s embarrasing to tell a new T I´ve never been in a relationship.

How to deal with this matter?

[callisto711]

I can't imagine a therapist that wouldn't talk about relationships and sex. I don't think you need to ask that and it isn't something I asked my therapist. In fact, I talk about stuff with my therapist that I never thought I would talk about and it isn't stuff that she lists as a "specialty" of hers but it is fine. Therapists are trained in a lot of areas, and basic life stuff is pretty standard, like sex, relationships, parental issues, work issues, etc.

I agree. You don't need to ask. They live for that stuff.

[Favorite Jeans]

Ditto. Don't need to ask the therapist. If they're worth anything, they can talk about sex and relationships. You do need to ask yourself, after meeting them, if they made you feel safe and welcome enough that you can imagine yourself eventually broaching these issues with them.

[Lauliza]

This is something most therapists want to discuss since sexuality and relationships are a vital part of most people's lives. I understand how you feel, I've been embarrassed to admit my lack of relationship experience to Ts in the past. It's only been the last 10 years that I've realized how much more helpful therapy would have been if I'd just opened up earlier. That is what therapists are there for - to help us discuss things that are difficult to talk about with friends. Good Ts aren't judgemental so if you feel comfortable try to take advantage of that quality and bring up the issues that cause you distress.