Re the Downton Abbey assault/Bateses' makeup

unaluna · Dec 15, 2014, 07:51 PM

Talked today with t about Mr Bates finally finding out what happened to Anna. Her saying she now felt damaged, unworthy and him saying she was worth more because of the pain she had suffered.

It occurred to me that i had only ever looked at my own worth thru my parents' eyes, which under similar circumstances in their world would have been (indeed, was) diminished. My theme last week was that no one ever cared how i felt - if i was cold or hungry or tired or unfulfilled or embarrassed - and here Mr Bates simply cared how Anna had felt. It wasnt something he was going to use against her, which is how feelings were usually used in our house.

kaliope · Dec 15, 2014, 07:56 PM

what an excellent piece of insight. we werent allowed feelings in our home. they were a sign of weakness....

Dec 15, 2014, 08:02 PM

That whole storyline really sent me over the edge. No warning. No nothing. And so violent. As someone pointed out, Lord Grantham could put the entire estate at risk every week and he gets saved, but no such luck for a working woman. Such an ugly, horrible scene.

About your question: It's been several months since I saw this, but I thought Bates' reaction was in keeping with Anna's. If he said what you say he said, then guess it was her shame that stuck with me, because I don't recall anything positive coming out of that.

stopdog · Dec 15, 2014, 08:09 PM

I only liked the ones with a lot of Maggie Smith. I thought the whole series was simmering violence.

Dec 15, 2014, 08:12 PM

It was good the first year, I thought. Then it went downhill fast.... I was very happy when Mathew died. I couldn't stand his far off look. Then again, they all do that.

unaluna · Dec 15, 2014, 08:35 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by licketysplit

That whole storyline really sent me over the edge. No warning. No nothing. And so violent. As someone pointed out, Lord Grantham could put the entire estate at risk every week and he gets saved, but no such luck for a working woman. Such an ugly, horrible scene.

About your question: It's been several months since I saw this, but I thought Bates' reaction was in keeping with Anna's. If he said what you say he said, then guess it was her shame that stuck with me, because I don't recall anything positive coming out of that.

It was a rerun for me. But it was a completely different experience for me this second time. I saw more how he felt when she froze him out. He told her she broke his heart, which i thought was harsh! But she did by not telling him why she stopped loving him, or so he thought.

Thats my point tho - "her shame" is not HER shame. Its what other people think, or what she thinks other people think - its not her feelings about herself. Its not like her guilt about something she chose to do. All of a sudden i realized it was how my parents saw my worth like on the open market, not about any sympathy for me. Its completely other-directed. Im embarrassed it took me so long to understand this, but i think its related to, who hurts when you hurt yourself?

unaluna · Dec 15, 2014, 08:38 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by stopdog

I only liked the ones with a lot of Maggie Smith. I thought the whole series was simmering violence.

I love when maggie and matthew's mother get into it with each other. They are hilarious. They are us a century earlier!

unaluna · Dec 15, 2014, 08:42 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by licketysplit

It was good the first year, I thought. Then it went downhill fast.... I was very happy when Mathew died. I couldn't stand his far off look. Then again, they all do that.

I just hate that the actors leave cuz they think they can do better now. I still miss the original Philip and Jenny from All my Children. Im actually a card carrying member of the Richard Hatch fan club