[bounceback]

I was wonder why therapists usually leave the gifts you get them in their office. What will it do if they brought it home pollute their house or something? I don't get it. I am guessing because it is supposed to be a strictly professional relationship but it kind of bothers me.

[musinglizzy]

I painted a picture on canvas for my T for her birthday/wedding last summer. She was very excited about it and was taking it home, she knew exactly where she was hanging it.

[pbutton]

Maybe because they want to show the client they have kept the item and that it is somewhere where the T will see it often?

My T has also mentioned that some of his personal decorations in his office are things his wife does not like.

[RTerroni]

The only time I have given a Therapist a gift was a card at the last session.

[Rive.]

It does make sense. Well, unless their office is at home.

They don't want (understandably) to mingle personal and professional life. Home is their private place, their escape from work & its pressures and/or 'reminders'. Not to mention it is a space shared with a loved one (family/kids) and as such, the 'decoration' ought to depend on the protagonists concerned and should not be imposed by one or the other.

Probably one of the most important: they don't want to encourage certain clients who might project or fantasise onto the import of such an action e.g. 'oh, I am so important/special to T... T took 'me' home with them... etc etc.' Might be part of their personal or professional boundaries and that is also fine.

[Petra5ed]

I haven't given my therapist any kind of gifts like that yet I suppose, so I dunno.

There was a poster on here once who wanted to give her therapist a painting on her final visit, and the therapist told her she didn't want the painting in her house because she didn't like to "take work home" and she didn't want to feel obligated to keep it in her office either, so she basically rejected this persons termination gift entirely. That always stuck with me for some reason, the client was devastated, and I couldn't believe the therapist couldn't just say "thanks" and throw the painting away. So... in a nut shell, I bet they are all different, and honestly, I bet they are all a little weird in their own ways as well.

My therapist has always been very kind about taking my gifts home with her. So etimes when we are on skype i can see things i have given her on a shelf or on the wall or the christmas tree. She says things like, "i put your gift right there so every time i see it i can think of you."

[bounceback]

I only gave this therapist a gift to let her know I was thinking about her on vacation. It was just a cup I found. I really thought hard about whether to give her anything or not because I didn't know if she would accept it. I end up giving her a different one because some of the paint had come off. She accepted it but said she had to keep it her office. I guess if I was a therapist I would be flattered if someone thought of me but maybe I think different then other people. Not every thing has to have a psychological reason behind it.

From what I've gathered from my T, he finds being able to compartmentalize highly important to his self care: between sessions, between work and home, etc. So, keeping gifts from clients in his office makes sense because that is where he meets with us, works with us, experiences us.

Also, he just likes to have those items in his office. He has everything from little happy meal toys that kids have given him, to photography and figurines from adult clients. He has them sitting in their appointed places around his office and we've actually talked about them before. He can tell me the story behind every one of them. I think that's pretty neat actually; his personal attention and connection to all those clients (some that he hasn't seen in years) is clearly evident and I find that reassuring.

[JustShakey]

I have thought about giving my T a gift a few times. I don't think I ever would though, because the gift is more for me than it is for him - a symbol of what is already a symbolic relationship. I suppose that's why they might choose to leave gifts in the office: I don't really 'know' my T. I know what he is to me, not what he is to himself, so I wouldn't even know what kind of gift he'd really like... I'd be just attempting to buy myself reassurance. I think anyway...

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[SoupDragon]

I guess it would be like me taking my work home, we all need a break and relaxation, otherwise it may become overwhelming.

I'm sure T's hear all sorts of things that may be potentially distressing to them and they need to take care of themselves too, so that they can then come back into work refreshed.