[dj315]

My T is great; these problems don't have anything to do with him. I'm just getting more and more frustrated with therapy recently. I feel like I've made a mess of emotions and I don't know what to do with any of them. I'm finding myself withdrawing the more my T shows support, and more than half of the time, my emotions are shut down during sessions (he thinks I'm too controlled, but I have literally forgotten how to let go of my emotions in front of people and I don't know how to be UNcontrolled now or in the near future to be honest). Plus, I feel like I am constantly analyzing things and it's exhausting. I'm sick of the introspection. I guess I just feel stuck overall.

I've been in therapy for going on two years and I've made a ton of progress, but I feel like I've uncovered more junk than I signed up for at the same time. That nagging voice in my gut is telling me I need to take a break. I need a break from this emotional crap. School is exhausting enough, and all of this is zapping actual physical energy from me. I wanted to "run" from therapy back in December, but that was more of a power play and out of fear (T can't hurt me if I run first) and this doesn't feel like that at all. I'm just tired. So I need some outside perspective...Does this sound like a time I need to stay in therapy the most, or can breaks actually be good? I'll obviously discuss this with him at our next session, but that won't be for another two weeks and the frustration is eating my brain right now.

[Ididitmyway]

Hi dj,

It's funny that when I read the first paragraph of your post, the thought popped in my head "she needs a break". And then I read you saying that your gut is telling you to take a break.

I'd strongly recommend you to do what your gut tells you. Yes, do take a break. I understand that your T is great and that your therapy has made you work through a lot of stuff, but I also believe that the way the therapy process is traditionally set up is not healthy exactly for the reason you've just mentioned, because constant introspection on a regular basis for a long time is exhausting and ungrounding. When deep seated emotions are uncovered, it takes time to process them adequately. But when you have to attend sessions week after week they keep piling up and there is no way to digest them properly. I also have a big problem with therapy becoming a central point of one's life. I don't see anything healthy about that. I believe that true healing should never take such a course that it would throw one out of balance, but when you find yourself in constant, never-ending introspection, that's an unbalanced mental state by design.

Taking a break from therapy can be a healthy thing, I think! I did it twice, both times were really good I think for my process overall. The breaks gave me a chance to process like Ididitmyway said, and also to practice "being" my newer and improved self in the real world, in other words to let what I'd learned in therapy "gel" or "settle" or something before I tackled more stuff. I discussed taking the breaks both times with t, of course, and she didn't have a problem with it either time and was ready to pick right back up again when I called to say I was ready to start again.

[stopdog]

I consider taking breaks to be vital to continuing to go.