[chloe_234]

I really like my therapist, and I don't really want to get a new one... but I'm annoyed with her after our last session and I'm not sure what I should do.

I've seen her 10 times now over 3 months, and generally our sessions have followed the format of- she asks me what I've been doing/ how I've been feeling, we discuss how I've been feeling, and whatever stupid things I did in the past week or two and how that relates to the reason I am there, we sometimes do some visualisation but I change the subject pretty quickly because I don't like it, and she'll suggest books/ things for me to listen to/watch that might help.

The last time I saw her was very different. I only see her every two weeks so by the time I get there I usually have a million things I want to talk about. Instead of asking me how I'd been going or what I'd been up to, she straight away asked me if I had decided whether or not I was going to keep coming (we had been discussing this previously because my medicare sessions have run out and I'll have to start paying full price). I said yes, but I was unsure whether it was really working.

She said that was good, but yes something was definitely getting in the way of our sessions, and we had to work past it. She then said she really wanted to persist with the visualisations we were doing, because even though I find it hard it will help. She then was a lot more firm about the direction the session went in and what we discussed... instead of letting me dictate it which usually happens. I didn't end up getting to talk about a lot of the stuff I had planned to when I came in.

I don't think the session was bad, it was harder than usual, but the stuff we did was good and made sense... but I kind of wish she had pointed all this out earlier... say after 3 sessions instead of 10... I feel like she's been very all over the place with the approach she's been taking, and she's been letting me control the sessions too much with what I choose to talk about.

On one hand I think what we've started doing is good and I want to continue it... but it also annoys me that we potentially wasted time and it has made me lose faith in her a little. I sort of feel like she's only just sat down and actually thought about what she's doing with me and the direction we need to go in. In saying that, I have enjoyed our previous sessions and we have discussed lots of important things. I guess I'm just confused about how different the last one was to usual.

[kaliope]

this would be my guess. you say that she has let you run the sessions based on what you wanted to talk about. and then say that she has been all over the place with her approach. if she was following your lead, then being all over the place was in response to where you went each session. but i am guessing it was about building rapport. rapport takes time. she needed to take time to get to know you and vice versa. trust needed to be built. letting you run the show builds this rapport. it also helps her discover what is important to you, the stressors in your life, your coping skills, problem solving skills, how well you take advice she gives you, etc. she can gather all this information and when she has enough, when she feels you trust her enough to take the lead and give direction then she can start putting a program together designed especially for you. a t isnt going to know what is going to work best for a client in a session or two. it takes a little bit of time.

again, this is just my guess, i could be totally wrong. talk to her about it and see what she has to say.

[growlycat]

Welcome to Ruptureville. All too common in therapy. It can lead to a stronger bond w/T if you work it out or it can end in therapy ending. I'm in the middle of it now.

I can't seem to take my own advice, but telling them exactly how you feel about how they are working with you is supposed to help.

[iheartjacques]

Ten sessions is really only getting to know you she probably only just started to figure you out and what treatment she thinks you need?