[ashley31]

Still very unsure and nervous about starting therapy... I don't know wht to do.
I have a terrible time trusting people in general. There are very few people i do trust in my life.

How do you learn to trust your T and open up to them? I'm afraid that if I start therapy I won't be able to open up and talk about anything. Any suggestions or thoughts? I just don't know that the risk is worth it if I can't open up to them...

[loophole]

If this is your first time... At least for me it was much easier to open up the. I had previously believed. I'm quiet and don't talk about my personal life with anyone in general. But it was nice once I did... Don't worry to much about if you can help it

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[ashley31]

Originally Posted by loophole

If this is your first time... At least for me it was much easier to open up the. I had previously believed. I'm quiet and don't talk about my personal life with anyone in general. But it was nice once I did... Don't worry to much about if you can help it

Sent from my iPhone 6 plus using Tapatalk

Thanks for the input. I appreciate it. I just don't know if I can bring myself to even make the appointment. I'm just too nervous about not being able to say anything, especially the first time or two. I know I need to but I fear i wont be able to open up.

Trust takes time. A good T will be patient and prove themselves trustworthy.

If you want, maybe you can type/write out your concerns for the T to read?

Don't worry, most Ts know that clients are anxious, they have ways to gently encourage you to talk.

There is a risk. I don't trust them.

[stopdog]

I believe in going slow and only so far as I am willing to lose.
Some report it works for them.

[AllHeart]

It's taken me a year to learn to trust my T (notice I didn't use the word, "completely"). I trust my T more than I have ever trusted anyone in my long life, but I don't really know if that is saying too much. Everyone is different. I think whatever your issues are will make a difference in opening up too. Either way, it is worth the risk to find out. Therapy can work wonders.

[dontevenknow]

I think at the beginning you don't necessarily need to trust the T but you need to trust the "process". It is hard for me to trust people, and it takes a while, trust is earned. For me I went in and said what I needed to at the beginning re: basically what was going on and such but then I let things out gradually. I would say something small and see what she did with it and worked my way up to the big stuff from there. I wouldn't recommend going in and right away talking about the thing that is most difficult for you, the therapist won't expect you to either. Start slow, feel things out, and do what feels right for you. If you try it and don't like it, you can quit. Might as well try right?

[Tearinyourhand]

Originally Posted by ashley31

Still very unsure and nervous about starting therapy... I don't know wht to do.
I have a terrible time trusting people in general. There are very few people i do trust in my life.

How do you learn to trust your T and open up to them? I'm afraid that if I start therapy I won't be able to open up and talk about anything. Any suggestions or thoughts? I just don't know that the risk is worth it if I can't open up to them...

after my initial session w/ T I compiled a list of observable things about him I thought might be barriers to me trusting him. I brought that list with me to my next session and we talked about ways to overcome some of the barriers. he validated my concerns and was very encouraging of my feedback. just being able to voice how hesitant I was to trust another therapist made me feel a lot better.

[MusicMike]

Learning to trust your T is largely an unconscious process, something that evolves over time out of the relationship between the two of you. For me, it was critical that from the beginning my T gave me feedback that reassured me he didn't judge me for anything I said. My T is good about always letting me know his reaction, whether a simple "uh-huh" grunt, or actual words, or body language, or something in-between. He doesn't leave any ambiguity. If his body language or manner or anything were ambiguous to me, I would probably project ill intentions onto him. So it's important that everything is congruent.

[nottrustin]

I believe a large percentage of people who go into therapy has trust issues. Most have been significantly hurt by people they love and that is part of what brings them to T. I am pretty sure it is normal for them so they work through it with the client. They now trust takes time. My T meets me where I am at and accepts whatever I feel safe and comfortable with telling her. Some information we chip away at. Each time we discuss something particular I will often reveal another detail...we have been together about 6 years.

[iheartjacques]

Been seeing mine for two years. I have told him more than other people. Probably because more has happened since I last had a good T. But I still have a fear he will hurt me (emotionally) or break confidentiality or have me out into hospital.

[ashley31]

Thanks for the input and thoughts about your expierences.im really trying to get the nerve to call and make the initial appointment, but I just can't get myself to do it... Far too nervous and scared still, unfortunately....

[PinkFlamingo99]

I don't think trust should be forced. It should grow naturally and at the pace that ferls comfortable. Just try to "go with the flow"

[nicoleflynn]

Trusting anyone is a process and takes time. Most therapists understand this. Perhaps writing down some of your thoughts and fears would help....and give it to your t. Little baby steps, a little at a time.

[dontevenknow]

Originally Posted by ashley31

Thanks for the input and thoughts about your expierences.im really trying to get the nerve to call and make the initial appointment, but I just can't get myself to do it... Far too nervous and scared still, unfortunately....

Some people have email addresses online. Maybe see if they have one on psychology today or something? If they do you could send an email about scheduling the first appt. I find email to be less stressful typically, but we are all different of course...