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anon10615
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Default Aug 17, 2015 at 05:46 AM
  #1
Diving in - my therapist doesn't think I've accepted what happened to me.

She's said this a few times and I always thought she meant that I'm at peace with it - which I'm not. But last week she clarified and said that when she says acceptance she means that she doesn't think that I accept that what happened actually happened to me.

I don't even know what that means. What does that look like?

I guess I'm a bit pissed off - every week for the past two years I've gone in there and spilled my guts, told her things that I've never told anyone, been honest and real... Yet on some level I feel like she doesn't think I'm in touch with it.

I dissociate sometimes when it gets too heavy/too close - maybe she thinks when I'm not doing that anymore then I'm accepting and experiencing the pain more?

I'll ask her tomorrow but in the mean time... Anyone have any thoughts? Personal experience with this?

Cheers guys.
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Anonymous37890
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Default Aug 17, 2015 at 07:50 AM
  #2
My thoughts are don't let a therapist dictate your reality to you. If you feel like you are in touch with it then she's being ignorant and close-minded telling you that you aren't. I hate when a therapist thinks they know a client better than the client knows themselves. (Not saying that is what yours is doing, but still I hate it.)
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Thanks for this!
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Default Aug 17, 2015 at 08:08 AM
  #3
Quote:
Originally Posted by paidfor View Post
Diving in - my therapist doesn't think I've accepted what happened to me.


She's said this a few times and I always thought she meant that I'm at peace with it - which I'm not. But last week she clarified and said that when she says acceptance she means that she doesn't think that I accept that what happened actually happened to me.


I don't even know what that means. What does that look like?


(Snip)

I'll ask her tomorrow but in the mean time... Anyone have any thoughts? Personal experience with this?


.

Not sure this helps, but the first time I saw No. 1, she made a distinction between making peace and acceptance. In her view, the former was impossible with any traumatic event, as there would always be some level of emotion involved. Acceptance, though, meant that you could still recognize whatever it was is painful, but that you did realize it had happened and had to be dealt with. She expressed it way better than I just did, and it made sense to me.

I don't know what yours means, I'd ask her in more depth.

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