[timentimeagain]

so my T always gets me few minutes later than my appt. at times hes coming out with another client ...at times not.

its annoys me alot..but i give him benefit of doubt ..that maybe last client left late and he is catching up with his work.

last few session..he is been ending it few minutes early...i didnt mind..thinking our session has naturally come to an end and there is nothign more to talk about...so its okay...cant force him to talk me on n on.

well..last 2 sessions...he started to wrap up...i knew it was abit early..so i kinda dragged it...but couldnt do a good job..cuz i still ended up outside his office 5 minutes early !!!!!

whats bothering me more is...that last week i moved away from my usual time...and booked the first appt of the day. and guess what...he was exactly 4 minutes late coming to get me. and again when he started to wrap up..i dragged our convo a bit more...and yup..was standing outside his door 5 mins. before our session was to end.

is he testing me ??? i wanna test him back..and arrive 10 mins. late ! let him wait for me for a change. (i wont do that..waste of my time n money but justa thought)

there must be a reason he does this...he is a very organized person..not careless type...1-2 minutes i get it...i will wait..but 4 mins? and no mention that u r actually late ! an ego trip? i am too busy? i have other important things to do and i lost track of time that you are waiting for me outside?

i am wondering is this a sign he is not interested in seeing me. hes seeing me cause i keep on making appts. week after week?

last week he gave me homework. he mentions some type to homework...almost every other session...and forgets about it !!!

he doenst follow up most of the time and it pisses me off..cause i always do it !!! he doesnt mention it ...i dont mention it...if it was important..he would have remembered...or it must be in his notes. with him spending less time with me in office..i feel like he doesnt care...and he is just putting up with me...why bother with the homework when he may not at all be interested in what i have to write...

go to counseling for some clarity..i walk out more irritated.

i wish there was a way..i can find out..does he want to work with me or not !!!! without directly asking !

i wonder if i am finding excuses for myself..not to do the homework !

[nutters]

That's just not right and I would call him out on it, you're paying for your full time and deserve it. My T was late the last three times and said he was sorry he was running behind. Five minutes late I can handle but he was between 10-15 minutes late each time is not acceptable but he still gives me my full time and doesn't end early. I was pissed by the third time and thought about deliberately showing up 5 minutes late, which at this rate probably would still make me early.

I have a huge thing in general about being timely. I always show up for anything early whether it's for work, meeting up with a friend, or therapy roughly 10-15 minutes early. I only allow so many chances for lateness when it comes to doctor and therapy appointments and as far as I'm concerned my T has used up all of his so I'm going to say something if it happens again when I seem him next week.

[timentimeagain]

Originally Posted by nutters

That's just not right and I would call him out on it, you're paying for your full time and deserve it. My T was late the last three times and said he was sorry he was running behind. Five minutes late I can handle but he was between 10-15 minutes late each time is not acceptable but he still gives me my full time and doesn't end early. I was pissed by the third time and thought about deliberately showing up 5 minutes late, which at this rate probably would still make me early.

I have a huge thing in general about being timely. I always show up for anything early whether it's for work, meeting up with a friend, or therapy roughly 10-15 minutes early. I only allow so many chances for lateness when it comes to doctor and therapy appointments and as far as I'm concerned my T has used up all of his so I'm going to say something if it happens again when I seem him next week.

I am curious what exactly would u say or bring it up. If it happens again.

[Leah123]

I would simply say that "it's my understanding that our sessions are 50 minutes long. I noticed that we've only been having 40 minute sessions lately, unless I drag them out. The time is really important to me. Will you help me make sure I get the full time going forward? You are a big help and I don't want to shortchange myself!"

[nutters]

Originally Posted by Leah123

I would simply say that "it's my understanding that our sessions are 50 minutes long. I noticed that we've only been having 40 minute sessions lately, unless I drag them out. The time is really important to me. Will you help me make sure I get the full time going forward? You are a big help and I don't want to shortchange myself!"

You pretty much need to say this in your case. In my case I would casually say, "we've been starting late these last several sessions, should I come in 15 minutes later for our sessions?" That's a bit passive aggressive I guess but it's one way to bring it up, LOL.

[AllHeart]

I would just mention to T that you thought sessions were 50 minutes, but the last several have been cut short due to a late start time and early end time. I'd also ask what the purpose of homework is if there is no follow-up to it.

It would be frustrating to have shortened sessions and homework with an unclear purpose. If you are walking out of T's office irritated, you owe it to yourself to ask for answers.

[unaluna]

So... you have a problem with asking directly? I can TOTALLY sympathize if that is the case. I would talk about that in session, not necessarily about the session length. If that is even possible. I couldnt even ask for a glass of water and i was afraid to look on the bookshelves.

[stopdog]

The woman tried to end early once with no explanation(such as I need to end early because I have an appointment I have to get to or a phone call that was only doable at this time or whatnot). I simply said - no I have 5 minutes left - and that was that.

[LonesomeTonight]

I'm just curious--do you know how long your session is officially supposed to be? I'd always assumed mine were 50 minutes, but I asked at one point, and technically, they're 45-50, so 45 is still within the acceptable range. (Though sometimes I'm in there for more like 55, so it evens out.)