[LesFleursDuMal]

Hi everyone !

So, here's the thing. For a few weeks now, I've been feeling weird in session with my T. Basically, I truly feel like he doesn't like me. I've been seeing him for two years, and I'm wondering if he's not fed up with me. I know he doesn't have to like me anyway, but thinking that he doesn't like me and doesn't want me here makes me feel depressed. I really feel like I need him and I don't want to lose him. Now my question is : do you think I should tell him how I feel ? Sometimes I feel like I should and other times I just tell myself that it doesn't matter and to just let it go. I don't know how he would react and it really scares me.
So, what would you do ? And if you think I should talk about it, how would you tell him ?

Thanks everyone

I think it is usually helpful to talk about how we are feeling, and those would be useful feelings to explore.

[dj315]

Definitely 100% tell him. I had the exact same feelings of thinking my T was fed up with me. I brought it up in a roundabout way (telling him I felt like I was wasting his time), and he picked up on what I was really saying and reassured me I wasn't. It was actually one of the best conversations I've ever had with him. So I would bring it up--It might help break down a wall in your comfort level with him. You could just take a deep breath and tell him exactly how you feel or beat around the bush like I did and hope he reads in between the lines . Ts tend to be good at doing that.

[LesFleursDuMal]

Originally Posted by dj315

Definitely 100% tell him. I had the exact same feelings of thinking my T was fed up with me. I brought it up in a roundabout way (telling him I felt like I was wasting his time), and he picked up on what I was really saying and reassured me I wasn't. It was actually one of the best conversations I've ever had with him. So I would bring it up--It might help break down a wall in your comfort level with him. You could just take a deep breath and tell him exactly how you feel or beat around the bush like I did and hope he reads in between the lines . Ts tend to be good at doing that.

Thank you both for your answer. I think I'll tell him, I'm glad it worked for you dj315, I hope it'll be the same for me

[LonesomeTonight]

I agree that you should tell him.

A couple months ago, I went through a rough patch mentally/emotionally. Reached out to my T and marriage counselor after hours (like late at night) a couple times within a week. When I saw my p-doc (all in same practice) the Friday morning after the late-night call to my T (T left p-doc a message about it), she recommended that I do this "day program"--I think it's also called intensive outpatient--where I'd spend a few hours a day with other T's, in group sessions, etc. And I wouldn't be able to see T, MC, or p-doc for a month or so while I was doing this.

My reaction to this was to start sobbing hysterically, because it just felt like they didn't want to deal with me anymore and were pawning me off on the people at this day program. P-doc said that wasn't the case but I wasn't convinced. I talked to my T on the phone afterward, and she said they just thought I might need a higher level of care, but she didn't really agree with the day program idea and we could try something else. I felt a little better after that, but still pretty bad.

I still had those feelings of abandonment and like they didn't want to deal with me--until we saw MC that Monday. I told him what I was feeling. He said that they weren't angry or frustrated or annoyed with me. It was the complete other side of the spectrum--it was that they cared about me and wanted to make sure I was getting the help I needed. That they weren't trying to get rid of me. That it all came from a place of caring. And that was what I needed to hear, and it made me feel much better. I now feel closer to and more supported by both my MC and T (still a little shaky around p-doc though, but I haven't known her nearly as long).

Been there, done that. He reassured me he didn't feel like I was wasting his time, and he wasn't annoyed with me. I still have moments where I feel like he doesn't like me. He thinks I am just projecting my feelings onto him.

[Serzen]

Yes. Be honest.

Great nick.