[TerriLynn]

So I am setting up my first therapist appointment in more than 10 years.

I have no idea what to say to this person. Do I just walk in and say hey, I am really screwed up in the head, my parents abused me and it has screwed me up, fix it!

Then I start thinking how insignificant my issues are compared to all the others he probably hears and maybe I should not waste his time. I guess trying to talk myself out of going at all.

[Serzen]

Go.

Just talk naturally. Let it flow.

[Inner_Firefly]

Originally Posted by TerriLynn

So I am setting up my first therapist appointment in more than 10 years.

I have no idea what to say to this person. Do I just walk in and say hey, I am really screwed up in the head, my parents abused me and it has screwed me up, fix it!

Then I start thinking how insignificant my issues are compared to all the others he probably hears and maybe I should not waste his time. I guess trying to talk myself out of going at all.

Hi TerriLynn, it is very brave of you to set up an appointment, even though you are not sure what to say.

Your issues sound important and your therapist will probably be interested to hear what you have to say.

It is hard to know how to begin, but sounds like you have a good start planned. Same as you I just blurted it out, I ended up rambling about all my problems in the first session. There is no harm in trying, if it is not good you can always stop going. Or, you may be surprised and it ends up being helpful after a while.

[Ellahmae]

It seems like you want help, as you made that first step of making the appt. I would go and just let come out what comes out and see where it goes, how it feels.

[Chummy]

The T probably starts asking you questions, like why you want therapy. That's how every T I started seeing had begun.

[Pennster]

No matter what, you won't be wasting his time- he's getting paid for it and he needs to keep getting new clients or he won't be able to keep his practice going.

Most therapists will ask you a whole bunch of structured questions for the first appointment, so you don't need to worry about not knowing what to say- he'll be working on figuring out what he needs to ask you in order to figure out how to help you.

[Favorite Jeans]

Originally Posted by TerriLynn

Then I start thinking how insignificant my issues are compared to all the others he probably hears and maybe I should not waste his time. I guess trying to talk myself out of going at all.

Other people's issues really don't matter here. Your issues are important because they're affecting your life. Your life is all you have to work with.

But just in case you're worried, in the event that you don't show up, I highly doubt that your T will instead use that hour to dig people out from the rubble of an earthquake or save people from Ebola or something. So don't worry, you're not taking anything away from anyone less fortunate by using that time to explore your issues.

[TerriLynn]

Thanks guys

[Bluesday]

I had my first psychiatrist appointment today. We didn't really get into anything. She asked me a ton of questions to diagnose me, told me what my 3 disorders were, then doubled my prescription of Paxil (given to me by my primary doc) and sent me on my way! It was nothing to be worried about at all.

[skeksi]

I remember feeling the same way as you when I first went. I had no idea how to articulate my problems beyond "something doesn't feel right." T asked me lots of questions in the first few sessions, and left lots of room for silences so I could find what I needed to say.

Ts are used to how strange it feels at first. Roll with it; whatever you say (or don't) is okay. When you're ready to dig deep, you will.

[CantExplain]

Originally Posted by TerriLynn

Do I just walk in and say hey, I am really screwed up in the head, my parents abused me and it has screwed me up, fix it!

Sure!

Originally Posted by TerriLynn

Then I start thinking how insignificant my issues are compared to all the others he probably hears and maybe I should not waste his time. I guess trying to talk myself out of going at all.

My parents never abused me but they screwed me up all the same. I don't think there's much point in trying to guess whose pain is greatest. Your pain is significant because it's hurting you. No other reason is necessary.

I'm guessing you have some feelings of worthlessness, which is a very good reason for seeking therapy. That's another place you could start.

[TerriLynn]

I can easily walk in there and say, so, I was abused as a kid and now I am all screwed up. But it seems so flippant.

On the other hand, I am sick to my stomach just thinking about it. Which is dumb, because its not like I haven't done this before.

[TerriLynn]

Ok, well today is the big day. I have my first appointment after work.

I hope it goes well.

[Ellahmae]

Good luck! Let us know how it goes for you.

[TerriLynn]

Everything went well. He asked questions, most of it was basic background stuff, where are you from, and then some follow up questions that were probably meant to gauge feelings about background.

Like, how long have you lived here, where are you from originally, do you plan to stay here? I was like, yes, I have no reason to go back THERE!

He asked if my family had visited me here, we talked about my dad saying he was thinking of moving here too and he asked how I felt about that, etc.

So just mostly background. It was fine. Next week will be harder.

edited to add: I did notice that there were times he asked a question and I couldn't look at him when I answered, and other fact based answers I could.