suicide, FIRST HUG with T, becoming a T

MY T, who've Ive been seeing for three years and absolutely adore hugged me yesterday...I was sure he was not a hugger..He's never even touched me before, shook hands or anything.I think its.cause he knows I had the hots for him, but really, he just didnt seem like a touchy guy.

I suppose he had no choice because he caught me on my laptop looking up suicide methods so he had to do something.

Ive had the mad hots for him all this time but I was too distressed to even cop a cheap feel I guess he knew.
I alwaysthought if he hugged me it would turninto a free for all becasue I really do have the hots for him. I just so sick of people it didnt even turn me on. Ive had the MAD hots for this guy for years but I couldnt even hug him back .

Then, he asked me if I would tutor one of his clients with a LD, and I did for a couple hours, and I felt so much better...between the hug and helping someone.

Helping this person made me forget about myself..I felt really good afterward. I really was going to end it before I saw him yesterday..And my T says thats why I should continue to try to be a T myself...he says keeping other people sane helps you keep your own nuttinesss in check.

Anyway. Thats my story. Figured i'd share.

Great you learned about how good it feels to help others, Petulant Wolf. I really enjoy tutoring too.

"Having had a spiritual awakening as a result of these steps, we tried to carry this message to addicts, and to practice these principles in all our affairs." The twelth step in AA, NA, etc, involves reaching out and helping others. T is right. Helping others can help you too by improving self-esteem, increasing socialization etc.
I hope you can become a T. I am studying to become an addiction counselor and then someday I will try to get a master's in social work and become a T.
I am glad that you have discovered the secret of helping others as a way to maintain at least some of your own sanity.

I too find it makes me feel good to be there for others. Helping somebody gets me outside of myself and my own problems. It also gives me new insight into myself and my own issues.

Funny story…well kinda funny. One time I was delivery food to the homeless shelter. I was ill and when I got back to my car I vomited. One of the men from the shelter said, “don’t feel bad, I’ve had days like that. What you need is a drink.” He offered me a drink out of his bottle. My friend, who is kinda like my sponsor, said only me could be doing volunteer work to stay sober and get offered a drink. Plus, it had been ages since a guy had offered me a drink. I guess it was kinda funny because of the situation and where I was at—it just made me smile a little. Really, it was touching that the guy would offer me a drink—he had next to nothing—who knows what it took for him to gather enough money to buy his bottle. In some ways it was very giving of him—he was trying to help me.

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DePressMe said:

Funny story…well kinda funny. One time I was delivery food to the homeless shelter. I was ill and when I got back to my car I vomited. One of the men from the shelter said, “don’t feel bad, I’ve had days like that. What you need is a drink.” He offered me a drink out of his bottle. My friend, who is kinda like my sponsor, said only me could be doing volunteer work to stay sober and get offered a drink. Plus, it had been ages since a guy had offered me a drink. I guess it was kinda funny because of the situation and where I was at—it just made me smile a little. Really, it was touching that the guy would offer me a drink—he had next to nothing—who knows what it took for him to gather enough money to buy his bottle. In some ways it was very giving of him—he was trying to help me.

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Awwww......