[musinglizzy]

I'm just curious....I've had issues with T and her cell phone before. I'm just wondering about others. Is your T's cell phone visible during session? Is it completely muted, so it doesn't ring, vibrate, or send a notification? Sometimes my T's cell is completely muted, but sometimes not. And if she receives a text or something, she always seems to have to look at it. She doesn't usually pick the phone up and look at it, it's usually sitting at a table next to her where she can just lean a bit to read the text when it comes in without touching her phone. There have been times she's left her phone on her desk, and she's actually gotten up to grab it and put it next to her.

Just curious how "present" other T's cell phones are in your sessions. I do sometimes get pretty irritated with the notifications, because when it makes the notification noise, she can't seem to NOT look at it.

With my own phone, not only is it always muted (even on vibrate), AND I turn it onto airplane mode, so nothing comes through during my session.

That would annoy me to be honest. My T's phone is nowhere to be seen, and last session his landline phone was ringing when I arrived and he apologised and put it on silent. Have you talked to T about this? I don't think I'd be able to bite my tongue if my T messed with a device in session.

My T used to use her cellphone to remind her it was the end of the therapy hour as she has a habit of running overtime.

The first time, it sounded a musical alarm like a calm ringtone, which she reacted to with "Whose calling me?" but I knew it was an alarm because I'm familiar with cellphone preset alarm ringtones.

Next few times, it was a much softer chiming.

Then eventually, the cellphone disappeared and she let sessions end at 1 hour 30 minutes give or take 5 minutes.

My phone is always in my bag with airplane mode on. Learned to do that after my boss called while I was in session.

My first ever T would play on his phone during CD guided relaxation tapes or when I was talking...

[musinglizzy]

Yes, I have brought it up to her. She has answered calls on a few occasions, answered texts on a few occasions, but even if it's on silent, she seems to keep an eye on it should it light up during session. Sometimes I think she does it to keep trying to convince me to say something to stick up for myself. It annoys me and she knows it. I always feel like I'm being tested somehow....

[Trippin2.0]

I have no idea what my T's cellphone even looks like.


I would be highly annoyed in your shoes, so I would definitely say something about it.

[growlycat]

My cbt t will ignore calls/silence them--thankfully he rarely gets calls at our early hour. But he does use it as the 5 minute warning to the end of session

[Raindropvampire]

my Pdoc, GP and T all have a patient's cell phones must be turned off while they are seeing you policy and they adhere to the same policy.

[Argonautomobile]

*Ring*

T: Sorry...*silences call*

Me: Do you need to get that? It might be important.

T: No, it's fine. Please continue.

Me: So, anyway, the closure principle states that--

*Ring*

T: Sorry, Sorry....*Silences call*

Me: Ah, that's twice now. Are you sure you don't need to get that?

T: No, No. Sorry. Please cont--

*Ring*

Me: Three times! You should get that.

T: I'll be right back....

But my therapist sucks like that. You should hold yours to a higher standard. Reading texts annoys me --if you wouldn't do it at dinner, you shouldn't do it in therapy (he, at least, does not do this). And I don't know about the whole 'does it to get you to stick up for yourself' thing. I hope not--that's a pretty lousy thing for anyone to do, and I'd hope your T would be able to communicate more directly, and not play stupid little games like that.

[musinglizzy]

Originally Posted by Argonautomobile

*Ring*

T: Sorry...*silences call*

Me: Do you need to get that? It might be important.

T: No, it's fine. Please continue.

Me: So, anyway, the closure principle states that--

*Ring*

T: Sorry, Sorry....*Silences call*

Me: Ah, that's twice now. Are you sure you don't need to get that?

T: No, No. Sorry. Please cont--

*Ring*

Me: Three times! You should get that.

T: I'll be right back....

But my therapist sucks like that. You should hold yours to a higher standard. Reading texts annoys me --if you wouldn't do it at dinner, you shouldn't do it in therapy (he, at least, does not do this). And I don't know about the whole 'does it to get you to stick up for yourself' thing. I hope not--that's a pretty lousy thing for anyone to do, and I'd hope your T would be able to communicate more directly, and not play stupid little games like that.

Wow.....so sorry you deal with that! As much as they get paid (I mean, unless they are expecting an urgent call) I think they just ought to be able to leave their phones alone for 50 minutes. I have NEVER heard her office phone ring...I'm assuming she has the ringer off on that one.

But, as far as phone usage during session, this is also the same T who was texting back and forth with me while on a phone session with another client! When I found this out, I ended the conversation. She called it "multitasking."

[Argonautomobile]

Originally Posted by musinglizzy

Wow.....so sorry you deal with that! As much as they get paid (I mean, unless they are expecting an urgent call) I think they just ought to be able to leave their phones alone for 50 minutes. I have NEVER heard her office phone ring...I'm assuming she has the ringer off on that one.

But, as far as phone usage during session, this is also the same T who was texting back and forth with me while on a phone session with another client! When I found this out, I ended the conversation. She called it "multitasking."

**** that. I'm sorry, but the therapy hour shouldn't be about 'multitasking' (aka: doing two things badly). This makes me angry. I put up with a lot of **** from my T, but actually texting in session would drive me to violence. I can't stand that BS. I wonder what she'd say if you started texting.

ETA: The office phone rings, too (actually, lights up--the ringer is usually off) but he doesn't pay any attention to that. This was his cell (which I don't usually see and he certainly doesn't play with. I'm not sure if it's a personal or work cell.) He did clutch onto a walkie-talkie for dear life once...but I was quite agitated and he seemed (in retrospect) a little worried for his safety.

Maybe one of your T's clients will attend session actively psychotic. That'll teach her to turn her back on crazy...

[RedSun]

My T and I both switch our phones off at the start of session. She leaves it on before in case I text I'm delayed.
Twice (in two years) her landline has rung, always at really bad moments! She went and pulled the lead out of the wall!
I think I'd feel annoyed if my T kept checking her phone in my session, I don't know if I'd be brave enough to say anything though...

[Chummy]

My T's personal cell Phone is usually next to her laptop on her desk. We're sitting a few metres away from the desk. It has gone off a few times and I have heard a notification of some message several times during session. It is on silent mode, but you do hear it vibrating. It's kind of annoying, it makes me think if she wondering who it is. I'm sitting there and I hear it vibrating, I'm trying to ignore it and keep talking about what I was talking about. But it is a bit disturbing.
And often the first thing she does after my session is to look at her Phone if she has notifications. -> We stand up, say goodbye while walking to the door, she goes to sit behind her desk, I open the door to leave and I see that the first thing she does is to look at her Phone.
I put my Phone on ''airplane mode'' while I'm in sessions or in other appointments.
At my Pdoc I've seen his Phone once, it was on his desk. I've never heard his Phone.
The cell Phone is way too present in our daily life.

[JaneTennison1]

She is a grown up professional not a teenager. I would be passive aggressive and either stop talking when she was on her phone or text her and say I thought you'd pay more attention this way. I'm grumpy though so don't listen to me.

I keep my phone on silent and I expect T does the same as I've never seen it or heard it.

[TishaBuv]

No, the multitasking with the cell phone is not acceptable in front of other people at all, especially not in front of someone who is paying you for your time to give them your undivided attention. Doing that tells someone "you are not my priority".

All the doctors have a voicemail that says "if you have an emergency, call 911", so why is constantly checking necessary?

If I remember correctly, ML's, therapist was on a phone session with a client while texting with ML. So the client wasn't even aware that the therapist was "multitasking". I think that's even worse because the poor person was talking away completely unaware that her therapist was texting with someone else. It's kind of like having a phone session with your therapist and you hear the click of keyboard keys and can't help but wonder if your therapist is playing Solitaire while you're pouring your heart out.

I put my phone on silent and burying it in my purse. I forgot once early on in therapy and it buzzed, my therapist politely asked if I needed to "answer that"? I fumbled to get it out and silenced it, apologizing. Her office phone rang once and she immediately got up and switched it to silent, apologizing. I've never seen her cell phone.

[musinglizzy]

Yup Jaybird, that's exactly it. I was horrified....I couldn't believe she was admitting that to me! I felt SO bad for the person she was on the phone with, and I said I was busy and had to put my phone away. Definitely makes me never want a phone session with her! Who knows what else she may be doing.... I agree, most people this day in age are TOO into their phones. When I'm at a meeting or appointment of ANY kind, airplane mode is turned ON, and I do not look at my phone even just to check the time. That would actually be hilarious if I had the nerve to text her during session....lol

[atisketatasket]

Don't know what No. 3's phone looks like. No.1's was always on her desk on the other side of the room, face-down. No. 2's was on her desk face-down too, but she sat next to her desk. It went off once but she didn't answer it, just picked it up and muted it.

I would not see a therapist who could not put their phone down during session. It is rude and it is also unethical to take someone's money for your time and attention without giving it fully.

[ruh roh]

Nothing like this has ever happened with my therapist, and I can't even imagine her doing that, or any of the many other bizarre things your therapist has done. Maybe your therapist wants you to feel like s***, but I can't see a therapeutic reason for it. I have always thought she was sick. I'm glad you've been reaching out to other therapists.

[musinglizzy]

Originally Posted by ruh roh

Nothing like this has ever happened with my therapist, and I can't even imagine her doing that, or any of the many other bizarre things your therapist has done. Maybe your therapist wants you to feel like s***, but I can't see a therapeutic reason for it. I have always thought she was sick. I'm glad you've been reaching out to other therapists.

I have my second session with T3 this morning! I really feel good about this match! I never thought I'd be able to actively go "T shopping," so I'm actually proud of the effort I've put into this. I still have not told T1 anything.

[divine1966]

I complained on here that my answered the phone in session. It wasn't emergency. I didn't say anything but my facial expression probably said if all. She never did it since. It seemed she did it not thinking.her phone is off and o don't see it

Overall id be ok if it is emergency. Regular calls no.

Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

[Ellahmae]

My T's phone is usually on her desk behind her on silent. There was one, maybe two occasions I can remember where it was vibrating but she ignored it and when it was done reached over put it on silent, and continued on.

[Sarah1985]

I couldn't deal with that. I'd feel unimportant to her. My therapist's phone is in her purse, hidden from site. I only know this, because she has occasionally shown me something and gotten up to get it.

[ilikecats]

I would be so pissed if my T were on her phone while in session with me. Or if she was just glancing at it each time she got a notification. It bugs me when I'm just hanging out with a friend and they're on their phone, but if a T did it, that would be infuriating. My T usually has her phone on her desk behind her I think. Once in a while it's on the table next to her face down. I've never heard any phone ring or vibrate though. Sometimes we look at her phone together if we're looking something up on the internet, and I'm fine with that. But if she were on it for anything else I'd be pretty angry.

[unaluna]

Somebody used to call consistently at the end of my session - it would just tick me off! Now i go in earlier - there is often no one ahead of me. He often gets a call at the beginning of the hour but it doesnt bother me as much then! At the beginning i have a lot of time and i can share. At the end, i have so little...

[stopdog]

Both of them have their cell phones on the table near them. Sometimes they go off or run vibrate I just don't pay any attention if the sound goes off. They both usually apologize and flip the lever to turn the phone to silent. It would only bother me if they actually answered it or responded to a text or something like that.