[stolen_innocence08]

My T has been on holiday for two or three weeks and I don't have an appointment booked. He said before he left he would get in touch when he's back to arrange one. Well he has been back a few days now. I think he's forgot.

Sounds like a hard place to be thinking your therapist has forgotten about you? I wonder if you could email/ text him to clarify your thoughts? My bet is he is jet lagged and taking a few days to himself after his trip, or perhaps he thinks you will contact him to arrange next appointment ?

Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

[stopdog]

It is possible the therapist forgot but that does not make it personal. Travel can be discombulating. If I wanted an appointment, I would simply call and make one. Then ask the therapist why they did not call and set up the appointment like they said they would.

[Waterbear]

That does indeed sound tricky. I know I would imagine they had forgotten and would want them to remember but maybe a prompt would be needed and then a discussuon about how you felt. Easier said than done.

[stolen_innocence08]

I usually have my session either on a Tuesday or Wednesday early morning. I can't contact T i really can't go there. But it looks like he's forgot. I will for sure quit though and save myself the cash. Cant even pay for someone to remember.

[Waterbear]

They are human too. I am annoyed at my T because she forgot something but I understand we all make mistakes and I have a responsibility to talk to her about it, even if it takes weeks, otherwise how can it be rectified? I get paid a wage at work, I still forget things. Can you email or even send a hard copy letter if you can't talk?

[stolen_innocence08]

Originally Posted by Waterbear

They are human too. I am annoyed at my T because she forgot something but I understand we all make mistakes and I have a responsibility to talk to her about it, otherwise how can it be rectified? I get paid a wage at work, I still forget things. Can you email or even send a hard copy letter if you can't talk?

I'll leave it until Monday night, as if that time comes and still heard nothing I'll definitely know he's forgot. Yes we all make mistakes but this hits a nerve with the ole abandonment issues.

[atisketatasket]

Or it's possible he's forgotten he was the one who was supposed to call, and is waiting for you to call.

People you meet will always be doing things like this - forgetting stuff, mixing up stuff, etc. If it's a trigger for you, therapy is a good place to start working out how to deal with it.

[Waterbear]

I hear you on the abandonment issues, I really do. My T only forgot to do something she had said she would and it reminded me of lots of things from the past but as the above says, you may find a lot of benefit in having it out with your T, as they say. Them reacting in a different way than we are used to is what can be the healing part of therapy. Thinking of you.

[stopdog]

I find a good thing about therapy is that one need not let a therapist off the hook like one might with real people because of friendship and all. Sure one has to pay them to let them know how badly they have failed, but it can be satisfying, in my opinion.

[stolen_innocence08]

I don't want to pay to tell him how much he has ****ed up.

;(

[LonesomeTonight]

I'd leave him a voice mail saying you wanted to set up an appointment. Could it be he mistakenly thought you'd set something up before he left? If this is an unusual thing with him, then I'd say reach out to him and try to schedule. If it's a common thing, then still reschedule, but talk to him about how much it affects you.

Has he been helping you in general as a T? If so, then give him another chance. If not, then still maybe give him another chance, but start looking into new T's in the meantime...

Just call and ask for an appointment.

[velcro003]

I'll jump on board that you might need to call to make an appointment. I know it hurts and sucks, but you won't know the reason why he forgot until you meet him. I waited around for half an hour for my T once, and finally left. At first i was like "Uhhh did i get the day wrong? The time?" But no...then i was like "She forgot!? WTF?!" But even though it made me very anxious, I called and left a message like "I thought we had an appointment today?"

She called me back a few minutes later, apologizing profusely--her client had gone over before and she didn't realize, and the front door was locked (which is why i thought she forgot, plus she walked that day, so there were no cars), which was not supposed to happen.

Long story short, I could have spun out and made a million reasons up in my head what happened, but i forced myself to call...and it turned out ok.