[substancelessblue]

On her website, my T has a list of issues she helps people with. For ages, up until a few months ago, she had listed “sexual difficulties.” Then that was removed. None of the other listed issues changed. She rarely changes anything on her website – I check it maybe once a fortnight just to feel safe/secure/present. Recently I’ve been having problems with sexual boundaries and past/current sexual behaviour. I have brought this up with my T but something in me is holding back because it struck me as weird that she would delete that from her website. It seems very deliberate but I can’t think of a reason. I’m not sure if she doesn’t want to deal with those issues anymore. Why would she go to the trouble of removing that issue on the list? Do you think it reflects anything about her therapy practice?

I know the list of issues on her website doesn't really have any meaning or is supposed to be a guide for current patients at all, but I'm just dwelling on her reason for bothering to remove it in the first place!

[ruh roh]

It may be that she was getting emails from internet trolls and not have anything to do with her actual practice or what she works with clients on.

I agree, this was likely causing a problem for her.

Is there a reason you take this personally? Does this change the help she is able to provide or the nature of your own sessions?

[Argonautomobile]

Originally Posted by ruh roh

It may be that she was getting emails from internet trolls and not have anything to do with her actual practice or what she works with clients on.

That would be my guess, too. I doubt it has anything to do with her actual practice. I think almost all T's will talk about/ can deal with clients' issues around sexuality, but not all advertise it for a variety or reasons--trolls being one of them.

Other reasons I can think of not to advertise (that have nothing to do with a therapists' possible discomfort with sex, because, come on, that's what therapists do--talk about 'uncomfortable' things) include not feeling that it's a 'specialty,' not feeling competent to take on more clients for whom it's a primary issue, and not wanting to scare away other potential customers who might pigeonhole them as 'sex therapists.'

[substancelessblue]

Originally Posted by justafriend306

I agree, this was likely causing a problem for her.

Is there a reason you take this personally? Does this change the help she is able to provide or the nature of your own sessions?

For some reason I just feel that she isn't so interested in that area anymore. Once I saw a book called "Sex Therapy" on her shelf so I took that as a good sign but when she removed that on her website it just struck me as strange, as if she didn't want to encourage clients with those problems or as if she wanted to move away from dealing with such problems. I guess she is equipped to deal with any "uncomfortable" issues but it felt like she had a change of heart or became more reluctant in relation to sexuality.

For me, it felt like she wouldn't go to the trouble of changing that single thing on her website if there wasn't a good reason.

[atisketatasket]

You could ask her. And if I were in your place I would take the attitude that as an existing client I was grandfathered into whatever she said her specialties were when I started with her. Actually, if the issue is one you want to discuss, she's your therapist - go for it.

[kecanoe]

I think your t would tell you if she is no longer willing to treat your sexual difficulties. She would let you know directly instead of assuming that you would know of the change thru reading her website.

[Lauliza]

Originally Posted by substancelessblue

For some reason I just feel that she isn't so interested in that area anymore. Once I saw a book called "Sex Therapy" on her shelf so I took that as a good sign but when she removed that on her website it just struck me as strange, as if she didn't want to encourage clients with those problems or as if she wanted to move away from dealing with such problems. I guess she is equipped to deal with any "uncomfortable" issues but it felt like she had a change of heart or became more reluctant in relation to sexuality.

For me, it felt like she wouldn't go to the trouble of changing that single thing on her website if there wasn't a good reason.

I agree with other posters that this probably has more to do with unwanted responses to her website and even the book in her office. I think it's very unlikely that someone who actually wrote in her bio that she treated sexual difficulties suddenly won't talk about it in the context of therapy, especially with established clients. I think she just doesn't want to promote sex as her primary focus.

[unaluna]

Even the opposite might be happening - she might be getting left OUT of listings that screen for the word sex. So she removed it to show up on the 'prude' Internet

[BrazenApogee]

My T say's the standard list of acceptable and expected things to talk about in therapy is:
The past,
The present,
"Us" as in therapist client relationship
And sex.

Websites are for new clients, there was likely some problem with the responses she was getting. You are an existing client. I encourage you to talk to her. Ask about the book and removal of that part of the list. That conversation may help get you to the conversation you've been wanting to have.

[scorpiosis37]

I agree with what others have suggested. It is about the kind of responses she was getting from new, potential clients. For instance, she may have been getting emails from potential clients who are sexual predators or have severe sexual addiction, which she may not be willing/capable of treating. That would have no bearing on the types of "average" sexual issues her existing clients need to discuss, or those who have been the victims of sexual assault. Or, she may have been getting messages from "creepy" men looking for sex therapy for the "wrong" reasons. I would not take this as any reflection on current clients.

[velcro003]

Originally Posted by scorpiosis37

I agree with what others have suggested. It is about the kind of responses she was getting from new, potential clients. For instance, she may have been getting emails from potential clients who are sexual predators or have severe sexual addiction, which she may not be willing/capable of treating. That would have no bearing on the types of "average" sexual issues her existing clients need to discuss, or those who have been the victims of sexual assault. Or, she may have been getting messages from "creepy" men looking for sex therapy for the "wrong" reasons. I would not take this as any reflection on current clients.

Hey scorpiosis!!!

IMO - all therapists should be able to talk about sexual issues, and god knows most of us have them. Sexual issues are kind of a given in the mental health realm.

It certainly can't hurt to ask, though I would be really surprised to hear that all of us a sudden she is no longer qualified or doesn't want to talk about sex anymore.

I agree with the others - I'm betting she started turning up on dirty internet searches.

[ramonajones]

I don't think there's anything strange about bringing this up at all. It's very appropriate. Just tell her you noticed it on your website and it brought up some feelings for you. It sounds like it's something it might be useful to talk about.