[Ad Intra]

Lately my self-esteem has been dropping and I've been thinking about my T's looks. She's very, very pretty and I look at my self and notice I look nothing like her. I know good and well that she would never want me to feel about my looks, and when we started working together I didn't care, but I care now.

[divine1966]

Try not to compare yourself to others. There will always be people who might look better or have more of XYZ same as the ones that have less etc there is no point to compare, especially something one cant control. Can you talk to her about it? You don't have to tell her that it's about her. Just say you envy other women looks. She might suggest something how to stop etc good luck

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Originally Posted by Ad Intra

Lately my self-esteem has been dropping and I've been thinking about my T's looks. She's very, very pretty and I look at my self and notice I look nothing like her. I know good and well that she would never want me to feel about my looks, and when we started working together I didn't care, but I care now.

What is pretty? She might be, she not be. But you're feeling is, plays into the tape in your mind.

Something to wok on and uncover what is really about

[PinkFlamingo99]

My T is beautiful and fashionable too. It would have made me really self-conscious but she's also really down-to-earth. I assumed at first she was judging me but it was an important lesson for ME in learning not to judge people by how they look. I get it completely.

[bounceback]

My last T was a petite pretty tiny thing with perfect white teeth. She was a runner. I am overweight and definitely not petite. It was hard sometimes because she was so pretty. If it bothers you, you can bring it up with her and see where the conversation goes. I actually never did. I couldn't bring myself to do it.

[rainbow8]

Originally Posted by bounceback

My last T was a petite pretty tiny thing with perfect white teeth. She was a runner. I am overweight and definitely not petite. It was hard sometimes because she was so pretty. If it bothers you, you can bring it up with her and see where the conversation goes. I actually never did. I couldn't bring myself to do it.

My T is slim and pretty, and I've always been uncomfortable because I feel inferior, and because I was sometimes attracted to her. It's been embarrassing but we've talked about it quite a bit. I'm not as attracted to her now because I look at the whole T, her personality and looks all together. I'm jealous of her thinness, but wish I could give her some of my weight because she's TOO thin. I think discussing how you feel about your T's appearance can be quite productive.

[Chummy2]

My other T is also slim and pretty. And then she's also nice, funny, smart, social. (and only about three years older as me.) When I met her for the first time I thought ''****, she's pretty and young. That's not going to work''. I thought she would judge me because I'm fat and ugly. She hasn't (at least not that I know of).
She turned out to be a good T, the only good one I had so far.
In the last year this actually became a bigger issue for me. I envy her so much. Somewhere in the last weeks before she went on leave, it as one of the things I wrote about in a letter full of worries. But she didn't started about my envy for her, and I was afraid to start talking about it.

I'm not really sure what to do about. It's probably best to talk to your T about it. And to work together on your self-esteem.

[unaluna]

Originally Posted by PinkFlamingo99

My T is beautiful and fashionable too. It would have made me really self-conscious but she's also really down-to-earth. I assumed at first she was judging me but it was an important lesson for ME in learning not to judge people by how they look. I get it completely.

Exactly. Life can suck for pretty people too. Maybe in a different way, but nobody escapes the suckiness.

[stopdog]

I have never really thought they were, but I doubt it would bother me much. They are not completely unfortunate. I rarely pay that much attention to what they look like.

I pay little attention to my therapist's appearance, though yes, she's attractive. I don't really focus much on how she looks, since what I appreciate the most about her has little to do with it.

Fortunately I've never felt particularly attracted to her or envious. I can see how it could complicate things a great deal.

[Cinnamon_Stick]

My T that I just ended with I think is so pretty and put together. She helped me see the value and all the qualities that I have. During my final session with her she said I have become a beautiful woman who has grown so much and has so much to offer the world and other people. My T has always made me feel so good that I didn't see the need to compare myself to her and that is a pretty huge thing for me as I used to do that awhile ago.

I couldn't care less what she looks like. Just give me someone with 1/2 a brain and compassion.