[rep97]

So I went to see my counselor today and we went back and forth about best way to treat my problems.

He thinks I should change my environment and use common sense like CBT and I would get over it.

I already live alone and I was saying that when the traumatic incident happened.. something subconsciously happened because I didn't let my body experience it and instead got caught in fight or flight.

So I suggested that we should do desensitization and talk about the traumatic incident as much as possible so I get over it.

He doesn't think so.

And my trauma is something very unusual. Basically I tried to get revenge on my father, case worker and psychiatrist so I talked about an odd sexual encounter with a masseuse in the presence of all 3.

Needless to say I was traumatized and now I have emotional flashbacks where I get really embarassed and ashamed and hide from people and curl up under a blanket until it goes away.

I also told him that I think I should be in charge of the flow of conversation and he just has to listen and be supportive.

He did do that but I think it required a lot f energy not to say something or interrupt me.

Is this too much to ask?

Needless to say I don't feel I could open up to him but he has to re-assure me and listen to me instead of giving me advice

[Out There]

I don't feel this is too much to ask. When it comes to trauma I am wary of CBT. Often the " freeze " aspect is in addition to fight and flight , the getting caught or stuck when we are unable to complete that. If you feel you would benefit more from doing desensitization work , then your T needs to listen.

[rep97]

Originally Posted by Out There

I don't feel this is too much to ask. When it comes to trauma I am wary of CBT. Often the " freeze " aspect is in addition to fight and flight , the getting caught or stuck when we are unable to complete that. If you feel you would benefit more from doing desensitization work , then your T needs to listen.

Exactly.. the "freeze" is what causes a trauma to be trauma. He agreed to do desensitization but I don't know.. when I say something he listens but forgets the next session. I am just so desperate and he is not helping things

[rep97]

Originally Posted by Out There

I don't feel this is too much to ask. When it comes to trauma I am wary of CBT. Often the " freeze " aspect is in addition to fight and flight , the getting caught or stuck when we are unable to complete that. If you feel you would benefit more from doing desensitization work , then your T needs to listen.

Just one thing.. you mentioned when it comes to trauma you are wary of CBT.

So what do you suggest for trauma or multiple traumas?

I tried brain spotting, didn't work. EMDR sounds the same from what I understand it is just eye movements and there is no talking about the trauma itself

[Out There]

I was quite successful with EMDR using bilateral stimulation without eye movements. I also find Trauma Release Exercises ( TRE ) very good , especially with the freeze aspect. I did talk with the EMDR T , I was OK with what came up , not everybody wants to talk about it. I've had energy healing and worked with a shaman also. I feel trauma needs multi disciplines.

[rep97]

Originally Posted by Out There

I was quite successful with EMDR using bilateral stimulation without eye movements. I also find Trauma Release Exercises ( TRE ) very good , especially with the freeze aspect. I did talk with the EMDR T , I was OK with what came up , not everybody wants to talk about it. I've had energy healing and worked with a shaman also. I feel trauma needs multi disciplines.

Sorry to bother you again but I just wanted to know this for certainty. You have the option to talk about the trauma during EMDR? or did you do it?

[Out There]

No bother , I've seen this confusion before with EMDR , whether you have to talk about what images and things come up. Some people don't want to say , and there's no need to. But some people want to talk about it and I've heard of therapists stopping this when people want to talk.

[rep97]

Originally Posted by Out There

No bother , I've seen this confusion before with EMDR , whether you have to talk about what images and things come up. Some people don't want to say , and there's no need to. But some people want to talk about it and I've heard of therapists stopping this when people want to talk.

Why would therapists stop someone from talking? If I can't discuss the trauma in a safe environment to process how am I gona get over trauma?

Brain spotting I tried was similar to EMDR like someone holds a pointer and you follow the pointer as it moves across from you and then the pointer stops and you process stuff without talking about them. This did nothing for me.

So if I have to do EMDR I need to talk about it... otherwise I don't think it might helpme

[Out There]

I don't know why some do. I think it was Focus62 , the member on here whose T stopped the talking and I couldn't imagine why. Maybe its confusion over the EMDR protocols.

There's Trauma-Focused Cbt, can your T do that?

[rep97]

Originally Posted by QuietMind

There's Trauma-Focused Cbt, can your T do that?

I don't think so. If he knew it would have come up.

He is eastern Indian and his english is so poor as well.

I mean I had to explain it to him what trauma focused therapy is about but I don't think he has had education in that. BEcause he thinksk changing environment would magically cure me.

I am just so desperate and no one seems to care. I am in so much pain but everywhere I turn to shuts in my face.

Sorry for the dark comment but I am at my wits end

Hugs to you. Can you change Ts?

[kecanoe]

When I do EMDR we talk about the memory that I am going to start with. Then she stops during the bilateral stimulation (she uses sound and buzzies) pretty often and asks where my mind has wandered to. I can talk as much or as little as I want.
I have found brain spotting effective in treating my DID. I dissociate and switch a lot less. My t says that brain spotting is EMDR and SE combined. I also like SE.
For me, the trauma was not a one time event. It happened again and again and again so there is no way for me to talk about a single instance and be healed. It also happened when I was a baby, so I have no words to express it.
EMDR/SE/Brain Spotting are the things that therapists are usually taught to treat trauma.
All that to say, maybe you need to see a t who specializes in talk therapy rather than a trauma-focused t?

[Out There]

I did trauma focussed CBT along with the EMDR. I meant standard CBT - the just get out of the house and you'll be fine thing.

[rep97]

Originally Posted by QuietMind

Hugs to you. Can you change Ts?

I donno, he seems to be the only male T there but I guess I could ask

[RedSun]

Rep, you mentioned that he is a counsellor, not a psychotherapist? It's a different role, with different training...counselling is/should be about dreaming a safe space for a client to talk about their issues, offload really. Psychotherapy would be more about creating a vehicle for change, maybe working with trauma, personality issues etc. possibly he just doesn't have the training that you need, in which case it might be worth seeing if you can get a referral to a trauma specialist psychotherapist.

I think the counsellor/psychotherapist definitions differ in different countries. In some countries the terms are interchangeable, in others they are different roles.

[RedSun]

Originally Posted by Echos Myron

I think the counsellor/psychotherapist definitions differ in different countries. In some countries the terms are interchangeable, in others they are different roles.

Oh yes, good point, I was basing it on UK systems.