Something T said bothers me

Last session I told T that maybe she was TOO friendly and that's why it's hard for me to accept the boundaries and reality of our relationship. So she said something like "if my style isn't good for you maybe ....I must have dissociated because I didn't hear the rest. I assume it was "maybe you should see someone else."

I've seen her for over 6 years and told her many times that I'm never seeing anyone else. I will stay with her until one of us dies or she stops working or moves out of town. I mean that. I've seen 5 other Ts and taken DBT. NOW she's suggesting I see someone else because of her style?

That stings! After all of our work together, she says that? I don't understand but I realize she said it out of caring about me. Why didn't she say anything about her style before? She wanted examples of how she was too friendly. I told her maybe the emailing, her being casual and open. Sending her photos and her commenting about them, in her one response, not that she answered me every time I sent a photo.

I have to admit her being friendly does make it seem more like we're friends. But to suggest after 6 years that her style might not be good for me?

Her warm style enabled me to get close to her and feel comfortable talking about anything. I didn't feel that way about my other Ts. I feel a secure attachment toward her.

I'm just feeling more and more like I misinterpreted her attitude. But, no. She made it clear from the start that she was like a coach, and that I would gradually need her less. I do need her less, but I want her just as much. None of my Ts could resolve the attachment problem, whether they had stricter boundaries or not. I have to do it myself. It's hard to keep therapy within the session only. That's why I want to post so much. I told T at my session that I was going backwards, and she said, "No, it means we have more work to do."