[retro_chic]

So I've had quite a few dreams about my T and they have always been very pleasant but the one I had last night was different.

It started off with me on my way to my session. For some reason we couldn't have it at the regular office so were meeting somewhere else. I had a hard time finding the place and had to catch two buses to get there. When I arrived I found myself at an upscale hotel/apartment/ university building (yeah, it was weird). I went to the room that T told me to meet her in and it was like a large open common room/library. T and I sat down on some of the armchairs that were there and started the session. I don't really remember much of the session other than I was really uncomfortable talking in an open public space.

Fast forward to after the session. It seems T drove me home and when we got there she came inside with me where I introduced her to my parents in the kitchen. She sat down at the table and they all started chatting about politics and T was making a lot of witty remarks. Then my Mum asked me to go down to our garage to get some juice out of the fridge . I go outside and as I am about to go down the stairs I see a man dressed in black with a black bandana cover his face leave out yard. I get really freaked out and go back inside telling everyone what happened. My T seems to know something about this man though I am unsure of how. Next thing a young man comes to our door with the back of his shirt all ripped and cuts on it saying the man in black did it. My Dad lets him in the house even though I tell him not to. My T says something like "I can't believe he (the man in black) is using this guy as a pawn".

At some point after this the man with the ripped shirt and my T leave and despite locking the house up, the man in black comes in and is all aggressive and threatening. My parents try to get away by moving towards the front door whilst I go further into the kitchen. The man starts going after my parents so I grab a kitchen knife and try to stab him but he sees me and grabs me. Then I see a screwdriver which I grab and start stabbing him in the chest eventually killing.

Sorry this is so long but yeah, it was such a weird dream especially the fact that this "bad man" was connected to my T somehow and she just left without any concern? Normally when I dream about T I feel very safe but this was the opposite.

This is just a theory, but I wonder if the man in black could represent the difficult things you are tackling in therapy?
So it is connected to T, yet it is very scary and potentially dangerous for you. It's also still there when T leaves, and you have to deal with it on your own (stabbing it yourself).
Having therapy in a public space could represent how exposed and vulnerable these feelings make you feel.

[retro_chic]

Originally Posted by Echos Myron

This is just a theory, but I wonder if the man in black could represent the difficult things you are tackling in therapy?
So it is connected to T, yet it is very scary and potentially dangerous for you. It's also still there when T leaves, and you have to deal with it on your own (stabbing it yourself).
Having therapy in a public space could represent how exposed and vulnerable these feelings make you feel.

This actually makes a lot of sense! My last session with T was really good - meaning I was quite open and we covered a lot of "big things" but it has left me feeling very vulnerable and anxious about how I am going to keep up that kind of momentum. I've also been feeling less depressed for the last month or so and that is actually making me feel worried that T might leave me and I've just been on edge thinking something bad is going to happen soon.

Originally Posted by retro_chic

This actually makes a lot of sense! My last session with T was really good - meaning I was quite open and we covered a lot of "big things" but it has left me feeling very vulnerable and anxious about how I am going to keep up that kind of momentum. I've also been feeling less depressed for the last month or so and that is actually making me feel worried that T might leave me and I've just been on edge thinking something bad is going to happen soon.

Sounds like you're doing some really good work, and this dream could be useful to share with T.

[ScarletPimpernel]

Ex-T taught me that the content of the dream is really not that important. It's the emotions that are important. Your brain just makes up a scenario to play out those emotions.

Don't know if you agree with that or if it helps?

I kind of agree with Echos and your reply. Maybe things are changing in you or your therapy (change in location in your dream), you still need help but it's not a crisis (bad guy outside), and you're afraid of your T leaving or changing because you still need her (T leaving and bad guy coming in)? And maybe... you killing the bad guy on your own means that you do have the strength to get through some of the bad times?

[Waterbear]

The others have said some very good things here I think, I just wanted to add that I feel for you because I have a lot of horrid scary dreams. I would recommend sharing it with your T, it does always seem to help me at least. Hugs to you. I agree with the fact that it isn't so much the content as the emotions, something I hadn't really thought of before.

[retro_chic]

Sorry to dig this old thread up again but I just wanted to post a quick update.

I told my T about this dream today and she came to pretty much the same interpretation that Echos came up with . I was a bit worried that T would think I was some sort of weirdo having a dream like this but I managed to get past that and just blurt it out haha. I'm sure she's heard weirder things before anyway!

[retro_chic]

I forgot to add that my T said the ending of the dream (where I killed the bad guy) reminded her of what Glinda said in The Wizard of Oz: "You always had the power, you just had to learn it for yourself". I liked that, it was a nice moment with T.