[AnxiousandAlive124]

So next therapy session I'm wanting to reveal some attachment feelings to my T. I've seen her on and off since nov. 2012. I'm honestly attracted to her inside and out, although I know part of this deal is transference. Anyways, how might I start off telling her I have certain feelings for her. I have never discussed any of my feelings toward T in T. So, this is nervewrecking on top of having social anxiety. I don't know how she will react, or anything. All I know is she cares.

Also, she is CBT therapist, on average, are they even used to working with transference?

[CantExplain]

Behaviouralists tend to downplay the importance of the therapeutic relationship, but they must surely know that transference exists.

[LonesomeTonight]

Without knowing too much about your T and how she interacts with you, I'm not sure the best way to have you share your transference/feelings. When I was first telling my T about my transference for my marriage counselor--which was somehow almost harder than telling him--I said (through tears), "Sometimes I just wish he could hold me." So possibly something like that, assuming you do actually think that about your T? Or something like, "I often feel very close to you." Or "I think about you often."

With actually telling MC, that was a bit different because I'd asked for an individual session. And he of course wanted to know why, and asked me some questions, like was it something he was doing wrong in therapy, was he doing something to make me uncomfortable. To the "uncomfortable" question, I responded, "Kind of the opposite." So then he was like, "Is it that you're attracted to me?" And I said, "Yes, physically and emotionally." I don't get the sense you'd want to be quite that direct right now.

Another thought is to come about it from a different direction. Like, say that you've read some stuff on a forum about transference and were wondering if she'd ever dealt with that with a client. And how she approached it. Though you need to be prepared if she's like "Why are you asking?" or "Do you think you might be experiencing that?" (Or if she doesn't.)

When is your appointment?

[AnxiousandAlive124]

Originally Posted by LonesomeTonight

Without knowing too much about your T and how she interacts with you, I'm not sure the best way to have you share your transference/feelings. When I was first telling my T about my transference for my marriage counselor--which was somehow almost harder than telling him--I said (through tears), "Sometimes I just wish he could hold me." So possibly something like that, assuming you do actually think that about your T? Or something like, "I often feel very close to you." Or "I think about you often."

With actually telling MC, that was a bit different because I'd asked for an individual session. And he of course wanted to know why, and asked me some questions, like was it something he was doing wrong in therapy, was he doing something to make me uncomfortable. To the "uncomfortable" question, I responded, "Kind of the opposite." So then he was like, "Is it that you're attracted to me?" And I said, "Yes, physically and emotionally." I don't get the sense you'd want to be quite that direct right now.

Another thought is to come about it from a different direction. Like, say that you've read some stuff on a forum about transference and were wondering if she'd ever dealt with that with a client. And how she approached it. Though you need to be prepared if she's like "Why are you asking?" or "Do you think you might be experiencing that?" (Or if she doesn't.)

When is your appointment?

Lonesome, my next appointment with her is january 5th, so a little over a week.

[AnxiousandAlive124]

Originally Posted by AnxiousandAlive124

Lonesome, my next appointment with her is january 5th, so a little over a week.

Think I'm going to go nuts waiting lol!

[ABC1357]

Wish your next session will go smoothly. I found a video which may be helpful for you. Seems transference is pretty common. Good luck.