[Eleny]

Hopefully this isn't a silly question. In therapy we've been talking about checking in with my inner child, deep breathing, and reassuring myself everything is ok.

Ive recently started a new job and encountered a few upsetting situations. Each time I've taken deep breaths and spoken reassuringly to myself and it's calmed me down. Today I walked in on people talking about me. It was very upsetting and I came close to tears, but I decided to talk soothingly to my inner child and take deep breaths and now I feel ok. This is really shocking to me, and I can't help but doubt it. Is this really how it works? Or is it a placebo effect? I can't believe I was able to make my sadness go away by being introspective and speaking kindly to myself. Usually I just break down.

Can anyone relate? I am doubtful and confused and I don't know why.

[Elio]

I am learning how to talk kindly to myself. I think for each of us, it will be slightly different things that sooth the parts that need soothing.

As my t reminds me... what is placebo but an action that helps. Another way she says it .. if it is not doing harm, and it is helping - why is it "placebo"?

It is great that the deep breaths and your inner dialog is soothing your inner child. Way to go.

[Eleny]

Originally Posted by Elio

I am learning how to talk kindly to myself. I think for each of us, it will be slightly different things that sooth the parts that need soothing.

As my t reminds me... what is placebo but an action that helps. Another way she says it .. if it is not doing harm, and it is helping - why is it "placebo"?

It is great that the deep breaths and your inner dialog is soothing your inner child. Way to go.

Thank you

I just struggle to accept it's that simple you know??

[Luce]

It can really be that simple sometimes. I remember very clearly the first time I was able to do it. I had left a credit card on the photocopier at work after photocopying it and my boss yelled at me as it fell in (somehow? ) and temporarily jammed the copier.
Usually after something like that we would switch and a child part who was very self hating would come out, but I was able to tell her it was okay - it had been a simple mistake and the boss lady was overreacting - maybe having a bad day or something - and it was fine. I would make sure it didn't happen again.
And then instead of switching and getting stuck in self-destructive coping behaviors we just carried on about our day. It was truly eye opening, and the auspicious beginning of a different way of life.

[ruh roh]

I hate that it works, because it's so effing ridiculous.

[Out There]

It's something I've begun to do recently - taken a little while to get used to it but I think it does work.

I hear ya ruh roh. I should have been able to know within myself to just breathe on tuesday morning - so simple once i reached out to t and she said it - then I'm all I'm so stupid duh i know it's that simple to calm myself down. I guess sometimes we just forget that we know. Or something.