Contacting Therapist After Termination

Donutworryrelax · Mar 04, 2017 at 11:00 PM

Hi everyone,

I'm wondering how unethical it is to contact your therapist after termination. I'm not planning to do this anytime soon --- that would be too weird for me. However, the therapist I saw at my University Health Center was one of the most influential people I have ever had in my life.

I am currently writing a work that I hope to publish one day, and I'm basing one of the main characters on her. I'm not using any identifiable information. When/if my work ever gets published, I'd like to let her know that I based on of the characters in my works after her.

Would this be weird/awkward or do you think she would appreciate it? Would it be unethical?

Please be honest. Thanks.

growlycat · Mar 04, 2017 at 11:01 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Donutworryrelax

Hi everyone,

I'm wondering how unethical it is to contact your therapist after termination. I'm not planning to do this anytime soon --- that would be too weird for me. However, the therapist I saw at my University Health Center was one of the most influential people I have ever had in my life.

I am currently writing a work that I hope to publish one day, and I'm basing one of the main characters on her. I'm not using any identifiable information. When/if my work ever gets published, I'd like to let her know that I based on of the characters in my works after her.

Would this be weird/awkward or do you think she would appreciate it? Would it be unethical?

Please be honest. Thanks.

You might want to talk to her first about it. Then maybe a lawyer. Just cover your bases.

atisketatasket · Mar 05, 2017 at 12:32 AM

You know how there's a disclaimer at the front of most fiction works stating that any resemblance to persons in real life is completely coincidental?

I don't know how seriously anyone takes that, but I'd go right to a lawyer to check. The question isn't so much unethical as illegal if you're talking publication.

Loco4 · Mar 05, 2017 at 04:53 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Donutworryrelax

Hi everyone,

I'm wondering how unethical it is to contact your therapist after termination. I'm not planning to do this anytime soon --- that would be too weird for me. However, the therapist I saw at my University Health Center was one of the most influential people I have ever had in my life.

I am currently writing a work that I hope to publish one day, and I'm basing one of the main characters on her. I'm not using any identifiable information. When/if my work ever gets published, I'd like to let her know that I based on of the characters in my works after her.

Would this be weird/awkward or do you think she would appreciate it? Would it be unethical?

Please be honest. Thanks.

My T has told me she will always be my T and I can always get in touch with her. Are you still seeing her? If so, maybe talk to her about post termination contact?

As for the legalities around fictional characters resembling actual people, I have no idea...

Mar 05, 2017 at 09:47 AM

I don't think there is anything unethical about contacting your therapist after ending therapy especially if you had a good relationship and separation. It's more the other way around that is considered to be ambiguous, for a T to contact ex-clients, but not vice versa. Many people do it, I have done it as well and it's been beneficial (I think mutually).

On modelling your character after her, this is something I would definitely discuss with her first openly and I think it is the right thing to do. Not sure about legal regulations but discussing it first is what feels ethically correct to me, and the opposite might be intrusive, especially if explicit. She might actually be happy to serve as a character model, and perhaps would even learn some things from how you see her in retrospect. I would never do it without consent. I also agree with the other posters about talking to a lawyer if it comes to attempting publication.

kecanoe · Mar 05, 2017 at 09:53 AM

Unless your ex-T told you not to contact them, it is fine to make the kind of contact you are talking about. I think that they would be glad to hear that you are doing well and would be honored to know that you are using them as a basis for a character.

Unlike other posters, I don't think there is any problem with basing a character on ex-T. As long as you omit identifying details, and change some things to obscure the real person, I don't see how they could object. How closely are you going to have the created character resemble ex-T?

danh19 · Mar 05, 2017 at 10:23 AM

if you let her know I sure it would be fine and good luck with the book

dtrain0802 · 08:47 PM

It's not a matter of legal, illegal, ethical or unethical. What if she simply doesn't like the way you crafted the character or something the character did within the context of your piece?

If she asks you take something out, will you? What if she wants you to omit her character completely? Do you really want to choose between the possibility of publishing the next great American novel and her? Screw that.

My approach would be to send a signed copy with a dedication expressing the importance of her role in her life. But that's just me. It's your book and your relationship.

thesnowqueen · Mar 05, 2017 at 08:46 PM

I imagine many if not all writers use characters they know from real life. It sounds like your relationship with T was good and the character inspired is likely to be quite admirable on the whole? It doesn't sound like you are plotting revenge, after all! So, I guess I'm with Dtrain on this...

dtrain0802 · Mar 05, 2017 at 08:57 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by thesnowqueen

I imagine many if not all writers use characters they know from real life. It sounds like your relationship with T was good and the character inspired is likely to be quite admirable on the whole? It doesn't sound like you are plotting revenge, after all! So, I guess I'm with Dtrain on this...

I'm going to assume you're being sarcastic given the fact you believe the character upon whom the character was based is admirable and that's fine. Admittedly, I was little too crass with the way I expressed my opinion and I apologize but the operative phrase here "is likely" not "is certainly" or "is definitely.

Isn't it possible - yes or no - that the character in the book might be the most noble, honest, kind, etc. character ever written but this person's therapist still wants to be omitted from the book? What then? Brings us right back to "Sophie's proverbial choice".

thesnowqueen · Mar 06, 2017 at 08:33 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by dtrain0802

I'm going to assume you're being sarcastic given the fact you believe the character upon whom the character was based is admirable and that's fine. Admittedly, I was little too crass with the way I expressed my opinion and I apologize but the operative phrase here "is likely" not "is certainly" or "is definitely.

Isn't it possible - yes or no - that the character in the book might be the most noble, honest, kind, etc. character ever written but this person's therapist still wants to be omitted from the book? What then? Brings us right back to "Sophie's proverbial choice".

Not sure I understand you. No one is 'in a book'. Characters are inspired to different extents by people the writer has engaged with. Some people will be flattered by that, some will feel exposed and some might be offended. The reaction is most likely to be determined by the manner of representation and the quality of the resulting character.

I truly do not believe a writer is obligated to get permission to create characters inspired by real life models. Also OP has not asked whether she should get permission for this or not. The question asked is whether - were the book to one day be published - it would be ok to contact T and let her know. My opinion is absolutely and that if the character is a positive one, on the whole, the T is more likely to be flattered than anything else.

bounceback · Mar 07, 2017 at 02:16 AM

I think stopdog should be able to weigh in on the legality of all this. IF i remember right she is a lawyer

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Contacting Therapist After Termination

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atisketatasket Child of a lesser god Member Since Jun 2015 Location: Tartarus Posts: 19,294 (SuperPoster!) 9 12.4k hugs given	Mar 05, 2017 at 12:32 AM #3 You know how there's a disclaimer at the front of most fiction works stating that any resemblance to persons in real life is completely coincidental? I don't know how seriously anyone takes that, but I'd go right to a lawyer to check. The question isn't so much unethical as illegal if you're talking publication.
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danh19 Junior Member Member Since Mar 2017 Location: england Posts: 15 7	Mar 05, 2017 at 10:23 AM #7 if you let her know I sure it would be fine and good luck with the book
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thesnowqueen Veteran Member Member Since May 2011 Location: S.Africa Posts: 717 13 646 hugs given	Mar 05, 2017 at 08:46 PM #9 I imagine many if not all writers use characters they know from real life. It sounds like your relationship with T was good and the character inspired is likely to be quite admirable on the whole? It doesn't sound like you are plotting revenge, after all! So, I guess I'm with Dtrain on this...
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bounceback Grand Member Member Since Jan 2011 Posts: 799 13 100 hugs given	Mar 07, 2017 at 02:16 AM #12 I think stopdog should be able to weigh in on the legality of all this. IF i remember right she is a lawyer
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