[Tbhimscared]

I'm scared both my T and my doctor don't believe what I say, or don't believe I really have any issues. I have so much trouble saying what's on my mind so I think they don't think I'm hurting or that I'm just complaining about everyday problems everyone goes through. I'm scared they'll tell me to quit complaining and get on with my life and I wish I could open up but I have a lot of trouble. Anyone else feel this way?

[kecanoe]

No, but I think it is common for people who did not feel valued/believed as children to feel as you do. I don't know of any ts or pdocs who would say things like that, anyway. I definitely know a pdoc (and assume there are many) who will tell someone who they believe is drug seeking, like for benzos, that they are fine. But I think that a t would assume that if you have put in the time and money to show up, you must need some help.

[Tbhimscared]

Originally Posted by kecanoe

No, but I think it is common for people who did not feel valued/believed as children to feel as you do. I don't know of any ts or pdocs who would say things like that, anyway. I definitely know a pdoc (and assume there are many) who will tell someone who they believe is drug seeking, like for benzos, that they are fine. But I think that a t would assume that if you have put in the time and money to show up, you must need some help.

I always think they're rolling their eyes behind my back, and since my meds haven't been helping too much (I've tried several different ones) I'm afraid that they think there's just nothing wrong and I'm making it up

[kecanoe]

Well, if meds not working are a reason to think a person isn't suffering, then my pdoc would have sent me on my way a long time ago. Trust me, they know that for some people it is hard to find a med that works, and for some people it is impossible.

What would happen if you asked your t if they think nothing is really going on? Or if you asked if they have a "diagnosis"?

Or maybe another way to think about it is that there are lots of couples who go for counseling when there is nothing really the "matter" with either one-as in no mental health diagnosis. But the couple still needs help and the counselor still wants to help.

I know people who have gone to counseling for help with grief. Most people experience grief in their lives, but some people choose to go to a counselor for help.

So what would happen if they don't think there is anything wrong? Are you afraid of being rejected/abandoned/dismissed? Or laughed at/disrespected? Or strung along and taken advantage of? Or something else?

[Tbhimscared]

Originally Posted by kecanoe

Well, if meds not working are a reason to think a person isn't suffering, then my pdoc would have sent me on my way a long time ago. Trust me, they know that for some people it is hard to find a med that works, and for some people it is impossible.

What would happen if you asked your t if they think nothing is really going on? Or if you asked if they have a "diagnosis"?

Or maybe another way to think about it is that there are lots of couples who go for counseling when there is nothing really the "matter" with either one-as in no mental health diagnosis. But the couple still needs help and the counselor still wants to help.

I know people who have gone to counseling for help with grief. Most people experience grief in their lives, but some people choose to go to a counselor for help.

So what would happen if they don't think there is anything wrong? Are you afraid of being rejected/abandoned/dismissed? Or laughed at/disrespected? Or strung along and taken advantage of? Or something else?

I think I'm mostly afraid of all of the above. I'm scared that I won't be able to voice my problems enough and that I'll be dismissed and sent on my way, or they'll throw some harsh "reality" of what they think my life is. At this point I don't think I've said enough to really get a diagnosis and I'm still early on in my therapy. I do think I have some real problems going on in my head that aren't necessarily directly influenced by my environment (grief, or something like abuse) but I'm mostly scared that they won't see how much pain I am in the majority of the time. I think this makes me even more scared to open up because I don't want to feel rejected, so I guess it's just this repeating cycle that isn't really helping my healing

[jesswah]

I think a good T knows that not everyone is able to open up right away and spill out everything in the first couple sessions. Have you tried talking about having trouble talking about what's on your mind? That would at least let your T know that there are other, bigger things that need to be brought out and worked on.

[Tbhimscared]

Originally Posted by jesswah

I think a good T knows that not everyone is able to open up right away and spill out everything in the first couple sessions. Have you tried talking about having trouble talking about what's on your mind? That would at least let your T know that there are other, bigger things that need to be brought out and worked on.

I've hinted at it but I think I kept it really general and maybe she thought I just have trouble opening up to other people and that I'm opening up to her when I'm really not at all