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View Poll Results: Would you file a complaint against a therapist you think acted unethically? | ||||||
Yes | 18 | 33.33% | ||||
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Not sure | 25 | 46.30% | ||||
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No, because the complaint process protects the therapist and victimizes the client more | 6 | 11.11% | ||||
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No, out of loyalty/gratitude to the therapist | 4 | 7.41% | ||||
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No, because I don't want others learning my private therapy business | 7 | 12.96% | ||||
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No, because I probably deserved whatever the therapist did | 2 | 3.70% | ||||
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No, for some other reason (please elaborate) | 4 | 7.41% | ||||
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Multiple Choice Poll. Voters: 54. You may not vote on this poll |
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Child of a lesser god
Member Since Jun 2015
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#1
This is a hypothetical (no reference to my own situation or anyone else's, and no suggestion that clients should or should not file complaints - everyone in such a situation does what they feel works for them).
Say you had a therapist. S/he did something unethical. Let's say it's something serious (if not a crime), something that would probably merit some kind of discipline (above the level of "take some continuing education courses") if a complaint were made and the board were to find the complaint valid. You're pretty hurt by the whole situation, emotionally and psychologically. You don't have access to the therapist anymore to try to work things out with them. Sure, you'll probably be okay after some time passes, but is that enough? Do you file a complaint? If not, why not? Feel free to elaborate in the comments. |
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#2
If my first therapist had been a member of a professional body, I would be filing a complaint now. Because of the unsolicited contact particularly.
I probably wouldn't have while I was still attached to him. |
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atisketatasket, taylor43
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#3
I said "not sure" because it would likely depend on the unique situation. First off, I would probably think on it for a good while before doing anything. I think my first choice and preference would be to settle it with the therapist (what I did with one of mine that screwed up in the past, about a year later). If that was impossible because the T was not open to it, I would try to assess what the potential pros and cons of filing a complaint would be for me primarily. I would also try to see if, based on the nature of the T's wrongdoing (e.g. if repetitive pattern I can identify), I could possibly help other clients from being hurt/harmed similarly. I don't think I would do it though if I felt that the process would make me worse than the initial act or would make me stuck in it further.
In any case, I would always choose to try to work out the conflict with the person directly before any indirect action and involving others. |
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atisketatasket
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Comfy Sedation
Member Since Sep 2012
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#4
not sure. but probably not. i mostly likely would not have reported my former T if i wasnt locked in a psych ward for 6 weeks being pressured to
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atisketatasket
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atisketatasket
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Legendary
Member Since Oct 2015
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#5
I've said not sure. I did threaten one T with a complaint though I had no intention of actually doing it. I wanted her reflections. She did damage me considerably and her conduct could have caused a less insightful person to go over the edge , which was my main motive that she should get how potentially tragic her conduct could become. Her supervisor was very concerned and much more clued in than she was. Her response when it came was less than ideal but I thought it would just have to do - you could go on forever trying to get someone to see something. It's understanding futility. I will add when I was discussing this with people they said her response may make you feel better or may make you feel worse. All situations are unique of course so I wish you well with whatever you decide ATAT - it's very painful when this happens.
__________________ "Trauma happens - so does healing " |
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atisketatasket
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#6
for me it depends on what they did or what they said that crossed the line.
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atisketatasket, precaryous, SoupDragon
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#7
I am not sure that I would because being a therapist and knowing what i know about complaints and how they are handled, really leant entice me to file a complaint.
I often thought about filing a complaint about ex t, there are so many good reasons to, she broke so many codes of ethics but truth is I can't hurt her just yet because I am still so deeply attached to her. If I ever was going to file a complaint I would tell her first. Truth is she knows she has crossed my boundaries, made sessions all about her, etc... in her head she did what she did because she thought she was being congruent. I wouldn't stand a chance filing a complaint against her, she has an excellent reputation and my complaint would be grist for the mill. I hope that you decide to do what is right for you ATAT because nobody else knows your circumstances. I think that it's important to have enough support in your life and self support to go a head and file a complaint, it's a huge loss to lose a t and to lose the trust you once had in them, it's Avery traumatic process especially if the complaint is dismissed or goes in favour of your t, that could be devastating if you are any way vulnerable right now |
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atisketatasket, Out There
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Magnate
Member Since Feb 2015
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#8
I would say yes, if and when the client is up for the daunting task and is able to handle the emotional consequences. I'm actually debating whether or not to file a complaint against my old t right now. While I likely have enough hard evidence of old t's many violations as well as documenting support from new t, that her license will be taken away without having to go to court it's not a guarantee. Right now I'm not emotionally prepared or strong enough to be put on the stand or hear what things old t might have to say about me (truth or fiction). Also, in my state, if this would go to court, any private info revealed about me that old t would use to defend herself goes on public record. Gotta prepare myself for that possibility too.
I know reporting old t would devastate her. The way she used and abused me, I shouldn't care. But, I do because there were a lot of good things done, too, despite the great harm she caused me. I have guilt around that to work though first. In the end, I know I need to stop this woman because she is potentially a danger to any client that walks through her door. It would also be healing and empowering for me to stand up for myself and speak out against her. Ideally, I would love for everyone to file reports against seriously unethical t's. Realistically, the reporting process isn't black and white so it's not easy to do. Last edited by AllHeart; Apr 26, 2017 at 05:03 PM.. |
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atisketatasket, kecanoe, Out There
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Grand Poohbah
Member Since Mar 2017
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#9
I said not sure.
I had a person in a mentorship position a while back pull some sleazeball sexual harrassment crap on me when I played for him. I could have filed a complaint to the school but didn't, instead I tried to stick it out because I needed his expertise. He treated me like **** after that, for example, screaming at me to get the **** out of his studio if I missed a note, because who was I to turn down a hotshot like him? Less than a year later? He married another student. She seems miserable. He asked me in secret to help her find performance opportunities and I laughed. She's married to this amazing god of a musician but they need my help! I still don't know if I would have reported him if I could have seen what was coming next. And I'm still screwed up from it all. I want to say I would file if anything happened again, with a T or otherwise, but I just don't know. __________________ *・゜゚・*:.。。.:*・'((something in English))'・*:..。.:*・゜゚・* |
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atisketatasket, Out There
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Comfy Sedation
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#10
Quote:
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atisketatasket, Out There, precaryous
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atisketatasket
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Run of the Mill Snowflake
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#11
I voted no for lots of reasons, including a fear that I deserved it and the uncertainty of having a whole system come down on me.
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atisketatasket, Out There
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atisketatasket
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underdog is here
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#12
No because most of their lack of ethics don't really bother me. Confidentiality would be about the only one that would upset me if they violated it. The rest of it, for me, is mostly just them puffing themselves up and trying to be more important than I think they are.
__________________ Please NO @ Selfishness is not living as one wishes to live, it is asking others to live as one wishes to live. Oscar Wilde Well Behaved Women Seldom Make History - Laurel Thatcher Ulrich Pain is inevitable. Suffering is optional. |
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annielovesbacon, atisketatasket
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#13
I'd say no, because when I went through something like this, I didn't. I don't regret it either, because assuming what the Ts file says about me, my complaint would not have been believed.
I'm happy to tell my story to elaborate, but I also don't want to hijack a thread. |
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atisketatasket, Out There, precaryous
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Child of a lesser god
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#14
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#15
Cool, thanks!
So upon reflection, my first therapist terminated our relationship very unethically. I was 18 at the time, and it couldn't have been more than 6 months after her hospitalizing me for a multitude of reasons. Though not a minor, my parents were still financially responsible for services rendered by T1. I don't know all of the details, but my parents were in arrears several hundred dollars to T. Unbeknownst to me, T1 had been trying to contact my parents about this with no luck. So out of the blue one day at the end of a session, T1 says "well, Daisy, that's going to be our last session." I, of course, freak out. T1 explains why she was terminating, and I was livid at my parents that they could be so neglectful. Mind you, one of my primary issues that I'm dealing with is surrounding the emotional and physical neglect of my parents. Another one of my majors is abandonment. So I leave T1 and go into damage control, calling my parents to resolve this. Couldn't contact them. So I end up calling T1 on her secure line and saying something like, "look, if I can bring $75 to our next session, can we not terminate please?" I'm desperate. T calls me back later that afternoon and says that she wants to hear it from my stepmom or dad. She has left them both voicemails and she'll let me know. So my stepmom hears the voicemail first, and calls T1 back while I was in the room. T1 answers and says, "so I talked to Daisy and you'll be sending a check or card for $75 next week?" Stepmom says, "oh, $75 is kind of steep on short notice. Not sure why Daisy said that. I'm happy to negotiate though." T responds with "you know what? Never mind. Your daughter is a pathological liar and needs way more help than I can provide. I'm done." I heard every word. Of course I lied! The one person that I'm supposed to trust and now she's abandoning me too? I went into survival mode, and when I was a kid, the lies spared me the abuse.
Possible trigger:
Now I've never seen the files from T1. No desire to. I can only imagine it'd be traumatic. So knowing that I'm probably a clinical pathological liar according to T1, and I got busted in a lie, I didn't report. My stepmom considered it, but I had to do it apparently because of my age. |
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atisketatasket, lucozader, missbella, Monarch Butterfly, Out There, precaryous
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atisketatasket
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Grand Magnate
Member Since Aug 2008
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#16
I would be terrified of what they might say about me in the process, but I like to think I would. There is no other way to protect other people from harm. And surely, even if the t is not punished, someone keeps track of the fact that there was a complaint and notices if there are more than one.
I've been hurt by a t retiring, and by pdoc cancelling appointments bc his daughter was dying. But I don't think those qualify as unethical. But some of the stuff I have read on here, yeah. I think I would file. |
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atisketatasket, Out There
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Grand Poohbah
Member Since Apr 2016
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#17
I chose "No, out of loyalty/gratitude to the therapist," because knowing myself I would probably consider filing a complaint but then feel guilty for "ruining" T's career and remind myself that she had done so much for me, it was just one mistake, etc. etc.
I'd like to tell myself that if my T did something awful I would report it but in all honesty I'm pretty attached and would psych myself out of it. __________________ stay afraid, but do it anyway. |
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atisketatasket
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Elder
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#18
I haven't read this thread at all, just your post ATAT. Interesting that I am in such a minority!
I selected "No, for some other reason." I am pretty sure if I was hurt by a T, that I would never file a complaint. 1--I am not worried that this is some criminal act, because I hope I am aware enough to avoid that. (That sounds judge-y, but i swear it isn't!) 2--I am entirely too lazy to do anything, ever. 3--I probably would find my fault in it somehow, unless it was so egregious, that I know I was in the wrong. 3a: Even if so, see #2. |
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atisketatasket
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Grand Poohbah
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#19
When I filed, I learned how truly unethical my therapist was and how thin the protections for the public. Two co-therapists turned into vengeful bullies when I tried to terminate, intimidating me into remaining in their toxic claws a few more weeks. Because it was group therapy, their humiliation was performed in front of an audience.
The psychiatric nurse, the one who said "something about you makes me want to kick you"? Her case wasn't heard at all. Meanwhile, the psychologist twisted events, portraying me as raging and psychotic. (I'm a mostly quiet, choose-my-words-carefully type.) He contradicted himself, both asserting that his vicious comments were to "challenge" me, while insisting I was incapable of discerning reality from transference. Never mind proving that opinion would require mind reading ability, or at least concrete verification. I understand this kind of defense is common. I wasn't psychotic at all, in fact thriving under their ministrations, until I dared criticize my therapists. So I lost my case. The psychologist got off unscathed, and today offers a gooey web video boasting his kindness and empathy. The retired psychiatric social worker paints smudged water colors and writes poorly-written articles for her neighborhood newsletter. I understand that unless the provider does something concretely horrendous and provable, the client has no chance. (A reporter told me an infinitesimal fraction of judgments are decided for the client.) There are only a few narrow categories of ethical transgressions--mine was "failure to refer." I emerged convinced that the grievance process is more to offer an appearance of protecting the public than actually doing so. I suggest contacting therapyabuse.org if contemplating the step. I recommend filling only when the client is ready to see the therapist's mask removed to reveal what a vicious, self-interested antagonist that person really is. |
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atisketatasket, here today, Out There, precaryous
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#20
Yes, if there was a clear breach of ethics which caused be harm and I couldn't resolve it with the T directly I absolutely would complain to their registering body. The reason being that Ts work with very vulnerable people at times and it's important they are ethical in their work, be complaining may save someone else from a bad experience but it would also be part of me respecting myself. It matters if someone treats me badly and that needs to be addressed because I'm worthy of receiving professional, ethical care from the people I employ.
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atisketatasket, Out There
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