[MrsDuckL]

Hi everyone,

I've been reading these threads for awhile now, and finally decided to post. I'm in my 30s and just started therapy for the first time in my life. I was abused as a child and have a great deal of hurt from childhood. I'm also an introvert and don't easily trust people. After a great deal of convincing to myself I finally found an AMAZING therapist, this week was my 5th session and I finally felt like I was able to trust him and make a small amount of progress. Today I get a call from his office that the therapist had a family emergency and had to leave town. The office person had no idea when he would be back, if it would be weeks, or months, etc--just that it was "hard to say." I'm devestated and heart broken, I feel like I always got a terrible hand dealt to me in life and this is just one more thing to be taken away. The office person gave me the number to other providers to contact, but I'm not on any medication so I don't need a rx, etc.

My T was independent by himself, so I find it hard to believe that a year after moving here from another state he would just close up shop. But the not knowing and no info, and preparing myself for the worst with never seeing my T again is devestating. Any advice or thoughts is much appreciated, thank you!

[LonesomeTonight]

I'm sorry that you're dealing with this. Did you specifically ask the receptionist about the "weeks, months" part? It's possible that all the T told her was "I need to leaver town for a family emergency, please cancel my appointments." So she might not have known. I'd try giving it a couple weeks, maybe check in with the office once a week or so. It could be he'll only be gone for a few days to a week, then can resume seeing clients.

[MrsDuckL]

[QUOTE=LonesomeTonight;5654102]I'm sorry that you're dealing with this. Did you specifically ask the receptionist about the "weeks, months" part? It's possible that all the T told her was "I need to leaver town for a family emergency, please cancel my appointments." So she might not have known. I'd try giving it a couple weeks, maybe check in with the office once a week or so. It could be he'll only be gone for a few days to a week

Thanks for replying! I asked for a timeline, and she just said it was hard to say, it could be weeks or months, she couldn't say, that it was hard to say and she didn't know. Through researching my T I concluded the front desk woman is probably his sister in law, so I'm guessing she knows the family situation. His main website is now down and psychology today profile got changed to say no new clients. So I'm wondering if I should take this as a more long term thing with being gone? I've never dealt with this before.

[kecanoe]

Ugh. Sorry to hear that. And the not knowing does make it worse. I guess the only good thing I can offer is that at least it was 5 sessions not years of sessions before this emergency.

Depending on how you are doing outside of counseling, it might make sense to give it a few weeks if you think there is hope that your t will return. I wonder if the office person would know more in a week or so; whatever the emergency is, your t will probably start making at least tentative plans.

On the other hand, if you really want to continue in therapy, maybe you could call one of the other providers and just see if there is a chance you could connect with one of them. I have had pretty good luck in finding therapists, even though like you, I am very slow to trust.

[lilypup]

I can imagine this is hurtful and a little shocking. It does sound like therapy was a good thing for you, so I would try some others in the area. You may find someone you like even better.

(Just an aside

The story sounds a little fishy to me. Who gives up a practice suddenly for weeks or even months? What kind of an emergency could it be? If it were a sick relative I can't imagine not either bringing the sick person back with him or making arrangements for the sick person where he/she is. Your T must need income. Also, if it was a sick relative, the front office should know. Just sounds fishy. Maybe you are better to know all this now.

Hopefully, there is a great new T out there for you!

[Moment]

I just wanted to say how very sorry I am this happened to you.
People who have not been in therapy might not understand what a blow this is.
I hope you will call one of the other providers and talk about all the feelings you have expressed here which are totally understandable. You have had to overcome difficulties in life and I am sorry that this one has come now, in this way. But a lot of the work of therapy comes not from the therapist but from you. If you were ready to start trying to explore your issues, I hope you will keep going despite this truly unfortunate setback. Even something as bad as this can be used by you to push your process of self exploration forward. I hope you make an appointment with another provider ASAP and make this your first agenda item.

[Wonderfalls]

Yes, but I wouldn't give up on this one yet. Saying weeks or months could just be a way of saying--don't expect anything anytime soon. Weeks could mean just a couple weeks. (Taking care of a dying relative and then the funeral etc., all the paperwork and clearing out the house. All that can easily take weeks. It's been 3 months now since my mother died and there's a whole still to settle--not on a full-time basis, however.) Months does seem unlikely, but maybe she's giving him wiggle room.

[Merecat]

It sounds like early days both in your relationship with him and for whatever emergency he's dealing with. I can think of a few things that would potentially take someone out of work for a few weeks/couple of months so I doubt there's anything untoward going on, just the uncertainty that comes with emergent situations.

I know it feels like it, but the universe isn't conspiring against you, it's just life happening - and life happens to everyone, even really good therapists. In your shoes I would give it a week or so and check back in with his practice. He may not be back at work but they might have a better idea of timescales.

[satsuma]

I'm so sorry, this is a horrible situation for you.
I don't think it sounds fishy though - perhaps a parent has died young and a child has been orphaned, for example, in which case other adult relatives might consider major life changes to adopt the child. Or anything like that.

I agree with the other poster who suggested contacting the receptionist in a few weeks - they may have begun making some plans by then.

Perhaps in the meantime set up a few apppointments with alternative Ts, so you can get a feel for them and see who *might* be good to switch to, in the worst case scenario that your T doesn't return?