[nottrustin]

Ugh. Have you ever felt like you life is on course to crash? That is where am right now. Between EMDR, anniversary of my parents deaths, dropping my kids off at college and T having a medical emergency life is spiraling out of control. I have been drinking way to much. T and I have discussed my alcohol use on and off. Before meeting with T last night I had a drink. T and I discussed a long time ago if i ever took any substance before an appointment to tell her...the discussion was more about if I took a benzo (I have a prescription). I never imagined it would ever happen. Then yesterday happened. Now trying to figure out how to handle it. I feel like waiting a week may be an issue and not in my best interest. Typically when it I want to bring something up that is painful And I keep avoiding the subject I send her an email..this just doesn't seem appropriate. I don't want to call as she is still recovering from her health issues. To make matters worse I woke up feeling horrible (hangover ?), and probably still had alcohol in my system...what a mess

[Argonautomobile]

I'm sorry things are so tough right now. You have a lot to contend with. I always find, when my life feels like it's on a crash course, that the outlook looks a bit better when I stop drinking for a few days. Even though I don't drink enough to get drunk / have a hangover anymore, even small amounts of alcohol have a deleterious effect on my mood.

Hopefully things will seem better in a day or two.

[nottrustin]

Originally Posted by Argonautomobile

I'm sorry things are so tough right now. You have a lot to contend with. I always find, when my life feels like it's on a crash course, that the outlook looks a bit better when I stop drinking for a few days. Even though I don't drink enough to get drunk / have a hangover anymore, even small amounts of alcohol have a deleterious effect on my mood.

Hopefully things will seem better in a day or two.

Thank you!!! In my line of work I should know how to handle this but not sure how.. I know I need to not drink...it is so easy though. Not sure how to tell T I Had a drink right before our appointment.

[nottrustin]

Originally Posted by Argonautomobile

I'm sorry things are so tough right now. You have a lot to contend with. I always find, when my life feels like it's on a crash course, that the outlook looks a bit better when I stop drinking for a few days. Even though I don't drink enough to get drunk / have a hangover anymore, even small amounts of alcohol have a deleterious effect on my mood.

Hopefully things will seem better in a day or two.

Thank you!!! In my line of work. I should know how to handle
this but not sure how.. I know I need to not drink...it is so easy though. Not sure how to tell T I Had a drink right before our appointment.

[Argonautomobile]

It is very easy to drink. Just sort of becomes a habitual way to wind down, you know?

I don't particularly like talking to my T about drinking - probably because he always brings it up first. But when I do choose to volunteer information first, thinking about why I'm volunteering makes it easier. Nobody really wants to "tell on" themselves, or make it a thing like you're admitting something out of a guilty conscious. For me, approaching it more like, "So this thing happened and I'd like not for it to happen again, so let's brainstorm solutions" is a much more palatable way to talk about imperfect methods of coping/stress relief.

[nottrustin]

Originally Posted by Argonautomobile

It is very easy to drink. Just sort of becomes a habitual way to wind down, you know?

I don't particularly like talking to my T about drinking - probably because he always brings it up first. But when I do choose to volunteer information first, thinking about why I'm volunteering makes it easier. Nobody really wants to "tell on" themselves, or make it a thing like you're admitting something out of a guilty conscious. For me, approaching it more like, "So this thing happened and I'd like not for it to happen again, so let's brainstorm solutions" is a much more palatable way to talk about imperfect methods of coping/stress relief.

Oh I like you approach.

[kecanoe]

Does your t think you need to stop drinking? Do you? Speaking as someone with long term sobriety b/c drinking was a problem for me, I do understand the uneasiness about talking about drinking-but I wonder if it is coming from you, from t, or from both?

[nottrustin]

Originally Posted by kecanoe

Does your t think you need to stop drinking? Do you? Speaking as someone with long term sobriety b/c drinking was a problem for me, I do understand the uneasiness about talking about drinking-but I wonder if it is coming from you, from t, or from both?

I initiated all the conversations. I go through spells where I think it is becoming an issue....usually when my mood is down and I drink more. T seems to think there is the potential for problems but does not think it is at the point.

[guilloche]

Originally Posted by nottrustin

Not sure how to tell T I Had a drink right before our appointment.

Not sure if this helps, but when I've got something that's hard to tell... I do one of two things:

1. If it's something that I can actually say, I'll preface with something like.. "I have to talk to you about something, but it makes me feel a little awkward (or scared, etc.) - so that my T knows that I'm nervous and feel vulnerable, and will be careful and not make it worse.

2. Sometimes it's something that I honestly can't talk about. Then, I write down what I can and hand it to them. It doesn't sound like this will work in this situation though, since you want to tell them before your next session?

Are you able to text/email your T? Do you think that would be one way to let them know, or would you feel less comfortable with that?

Just some ideas. I'm sorry things are rough for you right now, and hope they turn around soon...

[nottrustin]

Originally Posted by guilloche

Not sure if this helps, but when I've got something that's hard to tell... I do one of two things:

1. If it's something that I can actually say, I'll preface with something like.. "I have to talk to you about something, but it makes me feel a little awkward (or scared, etc.) - so that my T knows that I'm nervous and feel vulnerable, and will be careful and not make it worse.

2. Sometimes it's something that I honestly can't talk about. Then, I write down what I can and hand it to them. It doesn't sound like this will work in this situation though, since you want to tell them before your next session?

Are you able to text/email your T? Do you think that would be one way to let them know, or would you feel less comfortable with that?

Just some ideas. I'm sorry things are rough for you right now, and hope they turn around soon...

I am torn on how to handle it. There is a part of me that wants to email her and tell her. That is the easy way. She will have to read it and think about it before I see her. I also think there could be some benefit of her knowing now so that she can recall some of what happened. I can't imagine that something didn't seem odd to her. There have been times where something has arisen where I told her about a previous session and she said knew something was odd but she couldn't put her fingr6e on it

There is a part of me that feels it would be better to confront the situation head on, in person. I always avoid confrontation orpeople being "upset". I know T will not be upset. She is always supportive. I need to trust her. Maybe I will write it down and being it to the appointment in case I can't say the words