[Marsfx]

Looking at this forum you'd think it's about a 50/50 coin toss in terms of finding a therapist that will actually help you.
Why is it so difficult though? Why are there so many gray areas, blurred lines in terms of long term therapy?

It's so confusing, and there are no clear guidelines on what types of sessions may look like.
There are plenty of articles about how common transference is but very few about countertransference or how to recognize a therapist that may be crossing your boundaries. Many will say it's common to feel attached to your therapist, but how do you really know if they're encouraging it or not? I mean if anyone could encourage it without you realizing it, it'd likely be a psychologist right? And while boundaries vary by client, they seem to vary just as much by therapist.

We all have behaviors, and never thought about them even when we're aware a professional is watching us as we speak about things we've never told anyone. While they're body language is telling their honest feelings towards us, or are crafted to make us feel a certain way.
Some times I feel like therapist job has a simple definition, but what you they actually do is similar to that one friend with a job title that you don't understand and every time they try to explain, it sounds like something different

Idk, I'm venting? I'm confused about my own therapy situation and have been going back and forth on wether I want to continue. :/

[Miswimmy1]

I think that the difficulty in finding a "therapist that will actually help you" is caused by the unique relationship that is the therapeutic relationship. And by that, I mean that not only do the people have to be a good match (personality, gender pref., age pref., etc.) but the person also has to have the credentials and expertise to help with the client's unique situation. The job of therapist does sound like it has a simple definition but it's also a very vague one. Every single client is unique and brings an entire life history to the table. While we all have behaviors, the basis behind each behavior varies greatly from person to person. Just because one person presents with the same symptoms doesn't mean the same therapist or therapeutic approach will be effective/a good match. In order for a therapeutic relationship to be effective, there are just so many factors that have to align.

In regards to your questions about the gray areas of long-term therapy, I think that is primarily dependent on the therapist's personal way of doing things. As far as I know, there are very few guidelines for how long a therapeutic relationship should last. The ones that do exist probably say something like, "as long as the therapy is determined to be continually effective and financially feasible for the client" (which is very subjective).