Does your T explain what they’re doing while they’re doing it?

SummerTime12 · Mar 06, 2018 at 01:40 PM

Does your t tell you why they’re taking a certain approach with you or using a certain technique, and explain what it is? Do you feel them sharing/not sharing this helps or hinders you getting better? My current t does tell me what he is doing and why, and I like that he does it. My other Ts never did. I think it helps me trust him and trust the process more. A lot of times I already know why he said something, but I still appreciate him being open with me.

Thalassophile · Mar 06, 2018 at 01:51 PM

My T doesn't. If I was to take my sessions on a basic surface level it seems like all I am doing is going in for a chat and he is just listening. I know there is value in this alone but I am hoping there is more going on than just that. I'm guessing there is as I have seen changes and improvements over the time I've been in therapy. I would like if he did share more of what he was doing as I feel it would help the trust and stop me always wondering ..but maybe sometimes it's better not knowing for some people.

DP_2017 · Mar 06, 2018 at 01:57 PM

Nope. Not at all

satsuma · Mar 06, 2018 at 01:57 PM

Yes my T does, and I agree with you SummerTime, it's really important for me and it helps me to trust t. I also really think it helps me to get better and achieve my goals, because T and I are working as a team on my therapy and working from the same page.

SummerTime12 · Mar 06, 2018 at 01:58 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Thalassophile

..but maybe sometimes it's better not knowing for some people.

I agree! My t has told me that he doesn’t describe what he’s doing with other clients because he doesn’t feel it would benefit them the same way it does me. I guess it just depends. I think part of it has to do with the fact that I’m studying social work.

ElectricManatee · Mar 06, 2018 at 02:01 PM

I'm not sure whether my T does this. Can you give some examples about what it looks like?

SummerTime12 · Mar 06, 2018 at 02:02 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by DP_2017

Nope. Not at all

Do you like that way or prefer he did?

Quote:

Originally Posted by satsuma

Yes my T does, and I agree with you SummerTime, it's really important for me and it helps me to trust t. I also really think it helps me to get better and achieve my goals, because T and I are working as a team on my therapy and working from the same page.

Yes I think it helps me reach goals too. It also helps me to remember what my goals are and see the progress since he’s pointing it out often!

SummerTime12 · Mar 06, 2018 at 02:04 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by ElectricManatee

I'm not sure whether my T does this. Can you give some examples about what it looks like?

Of course. For example, my t told me the other day that he specifically told me he has a pet early on to build rapport with me. Another example is when he stopped talking to force me to think about something, he told me exactly why he did it.

jeremiahgirl · Mar 06, 2018 at 02:05 PM

I had regular therapy for countless years and very very few explain the style of therapy. Some worked some didn’t. Not until many years later (after being properly dx) did I start EMDR. My T explained everything very clearly. It was a long process but I’m here to say it worked for me.

Many clients I believe hi in therapy “blind” just needing help with their lives; I did this sad to say and had little clue what was happening. It would be wise to ask questions. This alleviates stress and needless hours of confusion.

I do understand most seeking help just want relief; grant it I did too but I learned in the long run having knowledge of ones struggles and mental health basics helps a lot.

satsuma · Mar 06, 2018 at 02:07 PM

My T explained about how the imagery exercises we do are designed to target the amygdala because the CBT part of therapy is helpful but doesn't always target our emotions. He explained how when I gradually hear his voice in my head instead of my abuser then it helps me have a healthy adult schema. He talks about when we should go over flashcard (CBT stuff) and when it's better to just distract and calm down. He also asks for my input all the time. So it feels like he is the professional but we are both driving the therapy and working together on it.

He doesn't say "I'm talking in a soothing voice at the moment because you're very upset". But I know he does that kind of thing too! Also if I asked him I think he would share what he was doing. I like that my T is very open.

DP_2017 · Mar 06, 2018 at 02:12 PM

i don't mind, things are good as they are. only thing that sucks really is his memory, i wish it was better but I'm also very used to it

Mar 06, 2018 at 02:15 PM

I think I'm more interested in my T helping me make sense of me.

maybeblue · Mar 06, 2018 at 02:26 PM

Yes they do, but I'm a pain in the neck client and I ask. "Why did you say that?" "How am I supposed to do that?" and sometimes if I'm feeling particularly annoying, "How many placebo controlled research studies support the efficacy of this method?" I don't get along well with psychodynamic therapists. They seem to have more trouble explaining things or I have more trouble understanding/believing their explanations. I'm the same way with medical doctors. I have a real pet peeve about being "talked down to," so when I feel like a professional is doing that I pull out my GRE words and start talking down to them.

Mar 06, 2018 at 02:40 PM

She often offers to explain the theoretical framework which underpins what we are talking about or what she is doing. I like it, but it equally seems to reassure her that she's "right". She would categorically refute that of course if she were to read this.

clueda · Mar 06, 2018 at 02:54 PM

My T uses a person centered approach, and way back when I started seeing her she never explained to me what she was doing. Ever. That made me very nervous. I felt helpless and powerless and frequently started dissociating. We / I noticed that when T explains to me what she's doing (or why she is doing something) it helps me feel safe, gives me back some control and helps me to trust T. I

My T and I have a deal that she tries to remember to keep me informed and that I ask her whenever I'm not sure what she is doing or why she is using a certain approach. Works quite well.

malika138 · Mar 06, 2018 at 03:13 PM

I don't know what approach she is using. Once she said I could ask. Not sure how to actually do that (well, besides the obvious of just saying those words out loud!). The entire process can just seem confusing. To trust or not to trust. To care or not to care.

InnerPeace111 · Mar 06, 2018 at 05:50 PM

MyT has never explained to me any of what she has done or is doing with me. I’ve improved tremendously. However, I had never thought about this before. It makes me curious now.

fille_folle · Mar 06, 2018 at 05:59 PM

No, my T doesn't inform me of what she's doing. My previous T didn't, either. Personally, I would find it strange if my T told me she was trying to build rapport with me, and might even distance myself out of confusion. That's not to say that I've never noticed her doing things that I suspect are aimed at building rapport, she just doesn't announce it. However, I can see how the added dialogue would be helpful to some people, especially those who have had negative experiences in therapy or for whatever reason, are suspicious of their therapist. Sometimes I wish I knew why my T says or doesn't say certain things, but I chalk it up to her theoretical orientation.

Mar 06, 2018 at 06:05 PM

I am very surprised by the number of people in this thread who aren't offered explanation of, or insight into, the therapy process or orientation. I thought it was quite standard.

MobiusPsyche · Mar 06, 2018 at 06:05 PM

My T sometimes explains things to me. I have mixed feeling about it because I have very similar training to her and know all the explanations anyway. But it is reassuring to the little part of me inside that's just hurting. If she tries something new she explains it first which again is good in building and maintaining trust.

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Does your T explain what they’re doing while they’re doing it?

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DP_2017 Grand Magnate Member Since Aug 2017 Location: A house Posts: 4,414 6 665 hugs given	Mar 06, 2018 at 01:57 PM #3 Nope. Not at all
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satsuma Grand Member Member Since Feb 2017 Location: UK Posts: 913 7 469 hugs given	Mar 06, 2018 at 01:57 PM #4 Yes my T does, and I agree with you SummerTime, it's really important for me and it helps me to trust t. I also really think it helps me to get better and achieve my goals, because T and I are working as a team on my therapy and working from the same page.
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ElectricManatee Magnate Member Since May 2017 Location: Earth Posts: 2,515 7 4,704 hugs given	Mar 06, 2018 at 02:01 PM #6 I'm not sure whether my T does this. Can you give some examples about what it looks like?
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DP_2017 Grand Magnate Member Since Aug 2017 Location: A house Posts: 4,414 6 665 hugs given	Mar 06, 2018 at 02:12 PM #11 i don't mind, things are good as they are. only thing that sucks really is his memory, i wish it was better but I'm also very used to it
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Anonymous59090 Guest Posts: n/a	Mar 06, 2018 at 02:15 PM #12 I think I'm more interested in my T helping me make sense of me.
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Anonymous54376 Guest Posts: n/a	Mar 06, 2018 at 02:40 PM #14 She often offers to explain the theoretical framework which underpins what we are talking about or what she is doing. I like it, but it equally seems to reassure her that she's "right". She would categorically refute that of course if she were to read this.
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malika138 Member Member Since Apr 2017 Location: home Posts: 287 7 623 hugs given	Mar 06, 2018 at 03:13 PM #16 I don't know what approach she is using. Once she said I could ask. Not sure how to actually do that (well, besides the obvious of just saying those words out loud!). The entire process can just seem confusing. To trust or not to trust. To care or not to care.
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InnerPeace111 Member Member Since Dec 2016 Location: USA Posts: 390 7 167 hugs given	Mar 06, 2018 at 05:50 PM #17 MyT has never explained to me any of what she has done or is doing with me. I’ve improved tremendously. However, I had never thought about this before. It makes me curious now. __________________ Out beyond ideas of wrongdoing and rightdoing, there is a field. I’ll meet you there. ~Rumi
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Anonymous54376 Guest Posts: n/a	Mar 06, 2018 at 06:05 PM #19 I am very surprised by the number of people in this thread who aren't offered explanation of, or insight into, the therapy process or orientation. I thought it was quite standard.
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