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View Poll Results: Has the therapist told you it is/has been a privilege/honor/other to work with you? | ||||||
Yes | 34 | 58.62% | ||||
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No | 20 | 34.48% | ||||
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Maybe | 2 | 3.45% | ||||
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Other | 2 | 3.45% | ||||
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Voters: 58. You may not vote on this poll |
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underdog is here
Member Since Sep 2011
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#1
Has the therapist ever told you it is/has been a privilege/honor/other to work with you? Did you believe they were sincere or was it more like something they learned in How to be a Therapist 101?
__________________ Please NO @ Selfishness is not living as one wishes to live, it is asking others to live as one wishes to live. Oscar Wilde Well Behaved Women Seldom Make History - Laurel Thatcher Ulrich Pain is inevitable. Suffering is optional. Last edited by stopdog; Jun 14, 2018 at 11:05 PM.. |
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Child of a lesser god
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#2
I did not think those who said it (DBC and Info) meant it. DBC in particular, especially since we were only working together 2 months and neither of us seemed to enjoy it.
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underdog is here
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#3
I was surprised when the woman said it to me. Thus it sort of sealed for me that such a phrase was simply a large part of the last chapter What To Say At The End -in the book Things For A Therapist To Say.
The second one said that at the end the client says "thank you for working with me" and the therapist says "It has been my privilege to work with you" I think my mouth dropped open. Of course, I did not say it and neither did she. Instead I asked "What the hell was actually supposed to happen here" and she said "It depends" __________________ Please NO @ Selfishness is not living as one wishes to live, it is asking others to live as one wishes to live. Oscar Wilde Well Behaved Women Seldom Make History - Laurel Thatcher Ulrich Pain is inevitable. Suffering is optional. Last edited by stopdog; Jun 14, 2018 at 11:09 PM.. |
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atisketatasket
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Grand Poohbah
Member Since Apr 2016
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#4
I can't think of a time when my current therapist has said anything like that, but when my former therapist and I terminated, she noted that I came to every scheduled session. I asked, rather naively, "Do other people not?" She laughed and said no, and that she felt lucky to have worked with me.
__________________ stay afraid, but do it anyway. |
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LonesomeTonight
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Poohbah
Member Since Nov 2017
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#5
The previous therapist that I hired (isn't that the usual phrase? ) didn't say that exactly, no. She would sometimes say she had learned a lot from me.
I do think I would have trouble taking the whole "privilege to work with you" thing seriously. It sounds so stilted and generic. |
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atisketatasket
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Comfy Sedation
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#6
yes he has and yes I felt he was sincere
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rainbow8
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Member Since Apr 2018
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#7
I can't remember the exact words but he has made me feel he is grateful to work with me and that he has learnt a lot from working with me. I felt it was sincere. But then he usually is sincere.
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LonesomeTonight, rainbow8
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Grand Magnate
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#8
Both people IWork with have said it is a pleasure to work with me and that enjoy working with me. T1 has said she has also learned a Lot from me. Do I think they say such things to other clients? Yup. However, I don't think they Re insensire when they say it.
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LonesomeTonight
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#9
In the beginning they both said things along those lines. I believe I seemed a more promising and cooperative client initially. At the end, no. But I never went to session to tell them I was quitting, I did it over email. Then I just went back a couple more times here and there to talk about specific things. There was no termination process or meeting for me. I kept in loose touch with my last T via email, so there wasn't really a clear ending.
With first T, we ended in a quite nasty rupture that was never fixed and just got worse, so it would have been really weird if he had expressed anything positive. He said other nonsensical things though. I do believe that versions of "it has been a privilege/honor to work with you" is a phrase used by many professionals who work with clients, not just Ts. I do think that sometimes it can be sincere, but both parties likely feel when it is genuine and also when it is just an empty phrase. I also think that if they want to express that they were pleased with the work/client, it's much more meaningful to make it more specific, list a few things that they enjoyed or found useful for them. |
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Lemoncake
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fille_folle, LonesomeTonight
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Grand Poohbah
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#10
No. I love my T , but part of his charm is that he feels it is an honor to work with HIM. He is always glad to see himself
__________________ Living things don’t all require/ light in the same degree. Louise Gluck |
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atisketatasket, fille_folle, Lemoncake, ruh roh
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Anonymous45127, atisketatasket, BonnieJean, elisewin, fille_folle, LonesomeTonight, MobiusPsyche
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#11
My T has said similar phrases. And I believe that she is sincere. But, then again, I think she does her best to find complements and wording that she believes it true for all of her clients.
__________________ Be who you are and say what you feel because those who mind don't matter and those who matter don't mind. ~Dr. Seuss
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LonesomeTonight
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#12
Ex T1 said it had been an honour, but she was also mildly abusive and all over the place so I don't tend to believe her
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LonesomeTonight
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#13
ExT said something to that extent. I remember specifically he said that he enjoyed having me as a client. I'm not sure if I believe him.
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LonesomeTonight
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LonesomeTonight
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Magnate
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#14
Quote:
Current t has never said such a thing. She told me she liked me and wants to work with me once if that counts. Her actions in the aftermath tell me it was a sincere statement. |
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LonesomeTonight
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Grand Poohbah
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#15
Not sure what you meant by 'other' so I said maybe. My T told me before that he likes his job, likes working and likes to work with me (he said he 'likes his job, he likes to work with me too'). I think it was honest, he seems to enjoy working and I don't see a reason why he'd like it less with me than with other people. It didn't sound like he wanted to say he likes it better with me than with other people, which I would have assumed to be insincere.
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LonesomeTonight
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#16
She has said this to me quite a few times. I used to believe it. Now it just feels like some kind of platitude and I hope she never says it to me again.
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BonnieJean, fille_folle, LonesomeTonight
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Magnate
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#17
Yes, several times. Usually when we’ve been doing some hard trauma work. It feels sincere. If someone shared with me what I do with him, I would similarly feel honored to have been trusted.
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LonesomeTonight
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Poohbah
Member Since Sep 2016
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#18
Never has a therapist said that to me.
__________________ True happiness comes not when we get rid of all our problems, but when we change our relationship to them, when we see our problems as a potential source of awakening, opportunities to practice patience and learn.~Richard Carlson |
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LonesomeTonight
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Elder
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#19
Quote:
My T has mentioned it several times to me. Some in relation to her clients in general "I feel honored that people share their deepest feelings with me," and some to me personally. I do think she is sincere, but it also doesn't really affect me in any way that she says (or do not says) it. |
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Grand Member
Member Since Mar 2013
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#20
My previous t said this to me. I didn’t question her sincerity. The way I see it, as a nanny, I will tell the kids I nanny for that I love spending time with them and feel greatful to get to be their babysitter. Are there moments when I’m stressed out or wish I could go home when I’m at work? Sure. But it doesn’t make what I say any less true, because I do love those kids and feel lucky that they are a part of my life.
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LonesomeTonight
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