Head On Head with Therapist?

Sometimes when a therapist makes a technical request without explaining why, I try to work around it so I get my needs met. However the therapist immediately expresses some sort of impatience to my request and insist on their side. From there it seems like the only option is to go head-on-head. But I want it better. I want them to understand why I want things my way while having valid reasons for it. For example one valid reason is regarding things we talked about in our last session. However from my experience people do not remember and it seems that even if I bridge, it always seems to irritate them.
Now I do not mean to irritate. I mean to get things my way. If not possible then I would love an explanation why rather than the other person becoming impatient, irritated or whatever. I guess this is beyond my control, however I find myself unable to get my needs met that way

For example, some therapists, when telling them the sessions are not working out, tell you "we can meet up and figure this out together". Why not figure this out on your own or on the phone? I am not going to waste my money on figuring out something that is potentially your problem
>Just a little vent there. Darn therapists

Go ahead, criticize me all you want. But if you're not going to help me get what I want then you're not helping

What do you want?

The bolded is exactly why I dumped my first T. And he criticized me boldly for it.

I definitely concluded that it is more effective for me to figure things out on my own, using whatever information, experience, or other resource is available. A lot of it is also free. The one thing though is that my biggest issues involved stubborn sabotaging and destructive behaviors, compulsive acts. Not purely feelings, more dysfunctional acting on momentary feelings. Theoretically, I wanted to stop these on my own for a very long time but kept failing. Trying to figure it out did not help stopping/changing on its own, the analysis is also often not very effective when we are stuck in a repetitive, self-defeating cycle. I had to focus on changing the behaviors first - then figure out how to make it stuck, from a healthier, less obsessed mindset. The premise of therapy to go and talk and that eventually things will change did not work for me at all.

Your communication style comes across as very demanding and abrasive. It could potentially be a reason why you have trouble making other people behave in the way that you want. If your approach with getting the therapist to do what you want is not working, then it would be a good idea to ask yourself if a different approach would work, if a compromise/different demand could satisfy your needs, or if the therapist's reasons for not meeting your demands are indeed valid to most others. From your past posts, it seems as if trying to do things strictly your way is not working and it might be time to consider a new method.

I really hope you are open-minded to these ideas. I feel sad that you are hurting and frustrated rather than recovering and happy. I'm sorry this sucks. I'm afraid that if you reject everything perceived as criticism or everything that does not directly solve your problem in the way you want, that you might not get better as quickly as we hope because your illness is blocking your ability to learn the proper recovery tools. It's not your fault. I hope my reply isn't perceived as something negative because I really care about your well-being (it took 30 minutes to write this) and wanted to offer an outsiders perspective.

One thing I like to remember is that the fish knows the least about water. It lives in the water 24-7, and has no other environments to compare it to.

I'm glad I am now able to perceive things in a better way
I do not want to compromise on things. For example, I want to negotiate with a person who has done wrong for me and do not want to move on. To add more to that, I tried hard to move on and I did not succeed
So I need a professional to help me sort out the hurt in a way that actually understands me, rather than put me in a negative spotlight and the person who hurt in an innocent spotlight like some therapist has done.
It's hard, and I feel the stress eating me away and it's disastrous. I try walking and resting as much as possible. It has helped so far. I'm starting to understand the importance of mental health, but mental health is not healthy if not listening to what I truly want to achieve in life

I like the title of your thread. I support your efforts to get your problems resolved by interacting with your therapist rather than just taking orders from him/her. Talking and working together is what therapy is about. Helping the client to resolve problems in a way they are comfortable with is good therapy. If the therapist does not understand you, I don't see how they can help you. If they have trouble communicating with you, it's just another indicator to get out.

I communicated outside therapy, and made a request. I asked for a compromise and they insisted on their stand. I felt opposed, all I wanted was to know if what I proposed is OK.
There's a limit to how much I can skip therapists however. I want it to help but the clashes of world views are very problematic for me. I want a therapist to understand my worldviews and help me grow from it, rather than remold over, and over, and over. I hate this process, it's absolutely disgusting

Your world view is probably fine but you also have to be open to your providers world view. It's a two way street.

Not when it's opposing my own view

That, in a nutshell is the problem.
Like I said therapy is a two way street as is any relationship.

You are going to be very unhappy and fustrated as long as you insist on having everything your way and only your way. Life is full of compromise and therapist are not helping if all they do is agree with you.

No, therapy is not a relationship. It's a treatment procedure. I am not interested in world view as you described by the way. My view is rather simple - I know what I need, I know how I want to accomplish it. Any opposition is going against me. Any negotiation - that's a wholly different story.

I don't get why some of you think I expect full agreement and understanding. Just because I don't want black doesn't mean I want white.

Oh and Deejay, speaking of two-way street relationships, if the therapist doesn't make an effort to adjust to my worldview, then guess what? The relationship is one-sided, and having to go through something which opposes me is just not right for me.

And by the way, in the last abusive therapist relationship, their world view was not given room for negotiation at all. They forcefully imposed it on me, while hypocritically behaving in opposite to that world view. Luckily for them they were manipulative and flexible enough to get away with it. Unluckily for them I have noticed that

Oh and by the way, I am VERY unhappy right now. But I am not going to compromise because of it.
A therapist saying that teasing someone back because it was annoying to me is "revenge", is extremely exaggerating.
A therapist not wanting to impose a diagnosis I want to be treated according to (I have legal confirmation files), yet non-hesitant in putting an abusive diagnostic trait on me which I put on someone on-topic for the sake of the therapist's understanding and treatment of the condition is AGAINST me.
And the only reason I stayed is because I got so worn out of searching. I may have found someone however, and that therapist is in the OP's question