[WishfulThinker66]

I see my T on Friday this week. We get together monthly. A great deal has happened in the month since we saw one another last and I am unsure of where I should steer the conversation - which I find I tend to wish to do (anyone else by the way?). My anxiety is greatly reduced and I have won some battles both small and large (hey! I got a job which I start next week!). This is a huge deal certainly worthy of spending an entire session discussing.

But there remains the undercurrent of how past trauma still affects my life. It is man related, particularly regarding anyone who appears to be military. Several times in an otherwise fabulous month situations arose causing some difficulty. You see, I get terribly uncomfortable and upset when I encounter a man with what I identify as a military bearing. These men (yes not all military men fit this bill) tend to be loud mouthed louts, misogynistic, often racist, and have an air of being an abusive jerk about them. When I encounter such men I get uncomfortable, passive, and tend to shut down. My efforts to avoid them will affect what I would otherwise do. For example, the man camping in the next site over earlier this month was just such man. I was terrified to leave my own site if it meant passing by his. Geesh, I almost wet myself avoiding having to walk past and possibly encounter him. Again, obviously a whole visit with T could be devoted to this.

I am unsure though how to present myself to my T this Friday. There is so much good in my life right now I wish to be happy and upbeat about. Yet, perhaps I ought to be honest and concentrate on the fear which arose.

[SlumberKitty]

Maybe make a list of things you would like to talk about and then order them in the way you want to talk about them. I think talking about the distressing things would be more helpful to me, but maybe spend 10 minutes of the session talking about the positives and then use the rest of the time to work on the "stuff". Just a suggestion. I hope your session goes well and you get out of it what you want.