[fallaximago]

Today I saw my therapist. I told her I need to work on my apathy, I need something tangible and strong, a strategy, a method, anything. She suggested I join a volunteer association which deals with helping children with disabilities among other activities. I think that's too much. I mean, I see nothing wrong in helping others, quite the opposite, but seeing as it is that I have trouble doing things at home, don't want to go out and get bored easily (not to mention my moments of frustration and desperation) aren't we running a bit too fast here? I think I should focus on myself, at least for the moment. What do you think?

[ArtleyWilkins]

My guess is she's challenging to find a purpose for getting out since staying in isn't work: you are apathetic, not doing things, getting bored. Getting out forces you to take a shower, put yourself together, interact with other people, and all of the above staves off boredom and apathy.

[ArtleyWilkins]

If volunteering for that kind of task seems too much, what else can you do that still forces you to get it together and get out on a regular basis (the regular basis thing is important). Some elementary schools need volunteers to make copies or help in the library. Or, if you are involved with a church, they ALWAYS have something that needs doing. Maybe an exercise group if you like that kind of thing. Some kind of crafting class or cooking class or something? Something that you commit to so that you have that pull to get up and move and get out of the house interacting with at least a few people on a regular basis.

What made you think that your therapist would know your preferences better than you? You could think of your options and discuss them with her. It's not her job to organise your activities. If you are apathetic, following someone else's suggestions is not going to work well.

[fallaximago]

Quite honestly, I never intended to ask my therapist to organize my activities. A friend of mine sent me a book from the US, I've flipped through it and I've already found a few things I could put in practice. I've never gotten that sort of advice from my therapist. That said, I think I'd start from taking a walk every day, the longer the better. I'd like to write down a schedule and try to stick to it. We'll see where that takes me.

[missbella]

I think each person has to find her own passions and commitments and the steps it takes to find them.

[InnerPeace111]

I love your idea of writing down a schedule and trying to stick to it. It’s exactly what I did to slowly begin healing from depression. I literally wrote down 1) get out of bed, 2) shower, and 3) brush teeth. I gradually added more as time went on. Baby steps, along with therapy, were a lifesaver. I wish you the very best.

[fallaximago]

Thank you, InnerPeace111. I went for a walk a couple of hours aog, it felt strange and a bit uncomfortable given that I'm not used to it, but in time things will change, I'm sure. It's just a matter of growing accustomed to the effort it takes. Also, I'd like to tackle my addiction to cigarettes but I don't know how to proceed.

[seeker33]

Walking is a fantastic anti depression activity. It's helped me so much with my mood and energy levels!

[Rive.]

I think it's worth trying it out. You can't know, or speculate on how it's going to be, before you give it a chance.

[InkyBooky]

Originally Posted by fallaximago

Thank you, InnerPeace111. I went for a walk a couple of hours aog, it felt strange and a bit uncomfortable given that I'm not used to it, but in time things will change, I'm sure. It's just a matter of growing accustomed to the effort it takes. Also, I'd like to tackle my addiction to cigarettes but I don't know how to proceed.

Going for a walk every day sounds simple but it is an amazing first step. Good for you for starting this already. It is so hard, but you can do it- and you will most likely feel better once you've started to make that part of your daily routine. Side note: I hate it when people give me advice like this (they make it sound so easy. But I have depression too...so I promise I have been there myself. This isn't empty or easy advice).

So, anyway, one bit of insight from my personal experience is: don't set the walking goal too high...for example, tell yourself- I just need to put on my sneakers and go outside and walk to the corner and back (or walk down the driveway, or walk around the block, or something easy like that). Basically set an easy goal that you know you can accomplish quickly and without too much effort. And then (this is important) really reward yourself once you've done it (try to find a healthy reward that is meaningful to you) and really praise yourself. I mean truly let yourself feel proud....because if you have depression then this is a big deal and you SHOULD feel proud.

After you do your simple walk for a few days or even weeks or months (and you let yourself feel proud of those accomplishments) then you may find yourself wanting to add some distance or time to your walk, because you will find yourself feeling a little better... Like...hey, maybe I'll do two blocks today, or to the second corner, or add five more minutes, or whatever. But only do what feels good!

And eventually you'll build a solid walking routine that your brain actually craves and seeks-out every day because you've associated positive feelings and reward with the activity. So, you've taught your brain that it won't be too difficult, it will feel good, and you'll feel proud and a sense of accomplishment when you're finished.

Oh, and if you have a bad day or can't make it out to walk...don't beat yourself up. Just say, oh well, that's okay...I'm gonna forget about yesterday and put on my sneakers today.

Good luck!

[SlumberKitty]

Originally Posted by InkyBooky

Going for a walk every day sounds simple but it is an amazing first step. Good for you for starting this already. It is so hard, but you can do it- and you will most likely feel better once you've started to make that part of your daily routine. Side note: I hate it when people give me advice like this (they make it sound so easy. But I have depression too...so I promise I have been there myself. This isn't empty or easy advice).

So, anyway, one bit of insight from my personal experience is: don't set the walking goal too high...for example, tell yourself- I just need to put on my sneakers and go outside and walk to the corner and back (or walk down the driveway, or walk around the block, or something easy like that). Basically set an easy goal that you know you can accomplish quickly and without too much effort. And then (this is important) really reward yourself once you've done it (try to find a healthy reward that is meaningful to you) and really praise yourself. I mean truly let yourself feel proud....because if you have depression then this is a big deal and you SHOULD feel proud.

After you do your simple walk for a few days or even weeks or months (and you let yourself feel proud of those accomplishments) then you may find yourself wanting to add some distance or time to your walk, because you will find yourself feeling a little better... Like...hey, maybe I'll do two blocks today, or to the second corner, or add five more minutes, or whatever. But only do what feels good!

And eventually you'll build a solid walking routine that your brain actually craves and seeks-out every day because you've associated positive feelings and reward with the activity. So, you've taught your brain that it won't be too difficult, it will feel good, and you'll feel proud and a sense of accomplishment when you're finished.

Oh, and if you have a bad day or can't make it out to walk...don't beat yourself up. Just say, oh well, that's okay...I'm gonna forget about yesterday and put on my sneakers today.

Good luck!

[fallaximago]

That was amazing! Thank you! Sounds like a plan to me