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Magnate
Member Since Jul 2013
Location: United States
Posts: 2,741
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Dec 11, 2018 at 01:25 PM
#61
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__________________ When a child’s emotional needs are not met and a child is repeatedly hurt and abused, this deeply and profoundly affects the child’s development. Wanting those unmet childhood needs in adulthood. Looking for safety, protection, being cherished and loved can often be normal unmet needs in childhood, and the survivor searches for these in other adults. This can be where survivors search for mother and father figures. Transference issues in counseling can occur and this is normal for childhood abuse survivors. |
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 LonesomeTonight
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Always in This Twilight
Member Since Feb 2015
Location: US
Posts: 20,806
(SuperPoster!)
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Dec 11, 2018 at 01:33 PM
#62
Quote:
I have lots of anxiety with finances, too. And I'm in a similar situation, with H the main breadwinner (though at one point, pre-daughter, I was), and I do freelance work (though in editing). H will express his concerns about finances at times, I take on more work, he gets annoyed at me for taking on more work. But I want to help more. And I feel guilty for what I spend on therapy and things. Finances can be a really challenging issue. So I get it... 
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Magnate
Member Since Jul 2013
Location: United States
Posts: 2,741
10 365 hugs
given
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Dec 11, 2018 at 01:37 PM
#63
Quote:
ME: I am doing the best I can do. I am sorry I can not bring in more money than I do H: When did I ask you to? Im fine with your job.. you’re doing great. ME:I did bring in more than last year but geez I just looked at my expense. With school and all 16,000 H:But no school this year, so you can relax a bit. No school for me either. ME: but I brought in (this much) only…$5,000 more than last year Well I know I do not say it enough but thank you for taking care of me H:I have no problem with your income. We’ll be fine. ME: Well I always feel inadequate and get really anxious and depressed and can’t relax when clients cancel or do not sign back up. I panic I am always trying to better myself the best I can. H:You’re taking initiative and finished class. Relax a bit and enjoy life on weekends. __________________ When a child’s emotional needs are not met and a child is repeatedly hurt and abused, this deeply and profoundly affects the child’s development. Wanting those unmet childhood needs in adulthood. Looking for safety, protection, being cherished and loved can often be normal unmet needs in childhood, and the survivor searches for these in other adults. This can be where survivors search for mother and father figures. Transference issues in counseling can occur and this is normal for childhood abuse survivors. |
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| LonesomeTonight
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 here today, LonesomeTonight
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Dec 12, 2018 at 01:57 AM
#64
Those self hate episodes are the pits.
 I found these self hypnosis videos and thought of you. Erick Brown Self Hypnosis Downloads I listen to them at bedtime now. They are great! There's even one for your harsh superego. Maybe listening to them will replace the negative self talk with the positive messaging in the recordings. You can find a couple of free ones on Youtube, but I bought one on Amazon Audible. And who needs therapy when you have these? jk, but I love these, they are my new thing now. |
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LonesomeTonight
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This is an old thread. You probably should not post your reply to it, as the original poster is unlikely to see it.|
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