[stopdog]

Do you think you and the therapist you hired have the same agenda?

[atisketatasket]

No—looking back most of them seem to have an idea of what I should want and they address that rather than what I do want.

[unaluna]

Excellent question! I think i would not be ready to return until i am willing to submit to ts agenda. Ditto for my chiro. It was easier for me to see that i was not keeping up with my chiros changes / expectations than with my ts.

[starfishing]

Hah, great poll options.

Yes, my therapist and I have the same agenda. As far as I can tell his only agenda has been for me to be, in the long term, happier and more satisfied with my life. We may occasionally differ on the details of how to make that happen, but the overall agenda is symmetrical.

[piggy momma]

Somewhat. He is more focused on my finances than I am, but otherwise I think we’re in sync for the most part. I set most of the agenda, so unless something comes up we pretty much do what I want. Occasionally I’ll ask him what we should work on tho.

[Elio]

I answered other because I do believe that we have the same overall agenda in terms of having me feel better about living - living in less pain (emotional and physical). So from that perspective yes. I don't believe she has much of an agenda session in and out. I set the topic of sessions. For the longest time I had something (s) to talk about. Lately it has been more floating and random things.

[88Butterfly88]

No. Still looking for a better therapist.

[ArtleyWilkins]

I said it doesn't matter, so long as I am getting something out of the sessions. We weren't always on the same page, but that was okay because sometimes my therapist could see things about me that I wasn't able or willing to see. That's kind of why I hired him.

[LostOnTheTrail]

We set the agenda together. We did some goal setting last week which will inform our focus for the new year.

[Waterloo12345]

Our agenda is pretty broad - basically to help me be content and functional, robust, maybe even a positive romantic relationship??????? When pigs fly.

I'm not sure. I think the endgame might be the same, but the path... not so much. Realized she wants for me to connect and socialize a lot more right now. Whereas I'm more about just me and enjoying things on my own.

[downandlonely]

I said Other because I stopped seeing therapists. I wasn't getting anything out of therapy, because my problems are biological. It doesn't matter how much I talk, I will be depressed if my medication isn't working. Now I go to a support group, and I find it helpful to talk to people who understand depression. I find that a lot of therapists don't and keep wondering why I'm depressed.

[susannahsays]

The therapist and I have different agendas that often conflict.

[SlumberKitty]

I have no idea if my new T has an agenda. But as long as I get something out of the appointment and feel like I'm making progress, then I don't care whether or not she has an agenda. Kit

I said other because my two experiences with the two Ts were quite different. I had goals. Both seemed very open in the beginning and for a while. The first one turned out to have a very strong agenda in the end that had nothing to do with my goals and even me, I think. It was utterly annoying. Second T never seemed to have an agenda, he just went along with whatever I wanted to do with my sessions and our interactions.

[susannahsays]

I misread one of the options as "The therapist doesn't have the agenda but I do."

This insinuates that I set the agenda and that the therapist is not privy to its contents. If we were voting on the ideal agenda situation, this would be my choice.

[unaluna]

I cant believe SD missed that one!

[stopdog]

I was always clear about my agenda

[Lefty Seven]

Great poll. My T's agenda remains elusive after telling me the story about the lion hiding behind the rock for the fourth time.

[annielovesbacon]

Good question. My therapist has told me she is determined to help me get over my perfectionism (she said this as an aside, not in a domineering way) so I suppose that is her agenda. I'm not sure what my agenda is, although getting over perfectionism is something I really ought to do.

[annielovesbacon]

Not sure if "agenda" is quite the same as "goals," but I remember my first session with my therapist she asked me what my goals for therapy were. I said, "I want to feel better." She said, "Do you have a more specific goal? Because one could argue you'd 'feel better' if you were dead." I knew I liked her right then. I appreciate bluntness.

[Amyjay]

Yes I do. There is a pretty clear and laid-out process for the therapy I need. The goals of therapy are woven into my psyche - I am divided, I need the parts of myself to be reconnected together. I provide the hardware and she provides the tools (EMDR, resourcing).
My agenda is for her to do the things I need. Her agenda is to do the things I need her to do. I feel quite in control of my therapy.

[nottrustin]

I don't like the word agenda because I think it has a negative connotation. I voted yes, though. Ultimately my goal is to feel better and live a happier life. Their goal has been to help me achieve those goals. There have been times that I didnt feel the need to discuss a topic they have felt it would help me reach my goals but they would back off. Eventually naturally we would come back to those ideas but that only happened when I brought it up.

I said I don't like the word agenda. (great job pollster stopdog including that as an option!) It sorta has a negative connotation to me. However I do feel like for most of the time I saw L, we were on the same page. There were times when we weren't and ruptures occurred but we worked through each of them successfully. So I'd have to say that for the most part, we were.

[susannahsays]

Originally Posted by stopdog

I was always clear about my agenda

Ok? I would not want the therapist to be privy to my agenda because she views me with suspicion. It would be easier for me to conduct the session as I wish if she wasn't able to anticipate my moves.