[hopealwayz]

I will explain in more details when the hurt heals a little bit.

Basically, over the summer he said that we could be friends after therapy was over. But I had some doubts and reservations because I still felt like I needed therapy. He even sent me an email that said, “Let’s take a break and work towards friendship.”

Then, he took the cowards way out and instead of facing me, he got my current pdoc to talk to the managers since he used to work there. And on July 23th, I was terminated. He never faced me at all or even told the truth.

I honestly wonder why he even became a therapist because he doesn’t seem to enjoy it and real estate is his primary gig. He’s a part time therapist.

He really hurt me deeply. And he doesn’t even care.

[Taylor27]

Big hugs im so sorry that is not how therapist should work with there client. Friendship is out of the question what a creep. I hope your pdoc know about this. So very wrong and not professional at all hugs. It if where me i would file a complaint towards him

[SlumberKitty]

I'm so sorry that happened. That is so hurtful. Huge Hugs. Kit

[Anne2.0]

Cowardly indeed. Terrible abuse of his role as a therapist and a good example of what not to do. I'm so sorry you were hurt by this person and I hope you know that this is squarely about him, not you. You deserved far better than this.

[susannahsays]

If you still have the email, you have evidence that could be used to file a complaint - if you want to. It was not ethical for him to suggest that your therapeutic relationship should be terminated so that you could begin a friendship. That's ethics 101.

I'm not sure if I understand the situation any more than I did previously, though. I feel like I'm missing something. Why would the pdoc talk to the managers so that you would be terminated? What was the reason given for the termination? You don't have to answer any of that, I was just wondering. Regardless, the ex therapist was wrong to say you should stop therapy and work on a friendship.

What a ***ed up and irresponsible person - I am so sorry, hope! Am glad that you have shared it here though

[Mopey]

It never ceases to amaze me how many clueless creeps are out there posing as therapists. I am very very sorry for the way you were treated. You don't need to go to therapy for that, you can be treated like that for nothing in the outside world.

I too have had many dreadful experiences with these people, and I am very very sorry you were hurt so badly. Wish I could make it better...

[Fuzzybear]

I too have been hurt by these people... I’m sorry this happened to you.

[hopealwayz]

I do still have the email saved in my email files but I would feel bad for filing a complaint even though he hurt me very deeply.

It seems like he got my pdoc to go up to talk to the managers so he wouldn’t look like the bad guy in this. In fact, he blamed my pdoc and he also blamed the managers by saying that they felt like too much of a liability.

Everything he told me at the end was a lie. He didn’t have the integrity and courage to tell me the truth. I used to think he was great. And now I realize that he is a very unethical therapist.

[elisewin]

It amazes me how many people have so little integrity that they would say things how they are, not making excuses or lies just to get away from difficult situation. It might hurt a bit more right there (terminating a client, not wanting to keep in touch etc), but in the long run lies and excuses hurt more. People deserve some basic honesty, especially vulnerable people. I'm sorry he did this to you hope!

[hopealwayz]

I pulled up this thread by accident. I didn’t want to file a complaint because I didn’t want to hurt his feelings and perhaps I was hoping that someday we could be friends. But he really hurt me in the end. He didn’t even sit down and explain why he was terminating me, he let other people do.

[Wonderfalls]

I'm sorry, I haven't been following your (or anyone's) threads. Your therapist terminated you and wanted you to be friends instead. But your therapist got your psychiatrist to complain (about you?) to the managers. Then someone complained (to you?) about your pdoc and about your managers. And then someone--not your therapist--told you that you were terminated. Is that right? I'm very confused. Who was it that terminated you in the end?

[sarahsweets]

Did he terminate you because he wanted to be friends? I find it odd that he would say he wanted to be friends with a client. I mean I know it happens it just seems odd to me. Is your doctor associated with the therapists' office? I do not understand why they would even allow the doctor to get involved in your therapy and care that way. I do not understand why the office would accept the word of your doctor if the doctor is not associated with the office and I do not understand your doctor even agreeing to do that. Personally I would consider filing a complaint about the doctor and therapist. What if you were less stable then you are? What if this is something that would have pushed you over the edge?

[divine1966]

From what I understood from your posts at the time of termination is that your t discussed termination with you for quite some time and you mutually agreed that it’s better as therapy wasn’t working. Some issues he possibly wasn’t equipped to handle (something about threatening self harm) and you being in distress that perhaps needs. To be taken care by a doctor not therapist. I thought your pdoc who also provides therapy was going to take over caring for you.

It didn’t sound as t terminated abruptly without warning and you in fact agreed to termination and perhaps office just called to confirm. It did not sound that he ended it so to become friends. You could always ask pdoc what happened since you said he was involved in termination.

So I am confused. What seems weird is him offering friendship. Did you ask to be friends. Even if yiu did he is out of line. How and why would he want to be friends? That is something totally out of line and perhaps is worth to file a complaint. Not as much termination itself but these ridiculous friendship suggestions

[DP_2017]

Friendship can happen sometimes after 2 yrs of silence but from what i read, therapy should never be terminated for that reason. It kinda makes the 2 yrs thing invalid if so. Most t would not suggest it. They might be open to it in the future but it's usually the client suggesting

Anyway complaints can be a long process and not always handled with discipline so it's something to really think over before doing

[hopealwayz]

I was confused too but at the time I thought what I wanted was a friendship and we talked about that but I began to have second thoughts because I knew that I still needed him as a therapist but I was scared to bring it up to him. So I just kind of went along with it.

The doctor who told the managers about the situation used to work at that office. But I’m baffled as to why T didn’t give me any warning that it was a problem and instead had my doctor go try to deal with the situation.

A part of me wants to file a complaint but the other part of me doesn’t want to cause him harm.

I don’t know what to do.

[DP_2017]

I wouldn't bother with a complaint, it's a long drawn out process. Just talk over the pain and such with your new T and move on the best you can

[susannahsays]

He said you should end therapy with him so that you could take up a friendship, right? That's pretty bad. Do you have any evidence?

[divine1966]

I am still confused. You said you two discussed and mutually agreed that therapy needs to be terminated. But then you said you don’t understand why he didn’t tell you he is terminating you. These are two contradicting perceptions of the same situation.

Do you have a new therapist? I’d try to forget about “friendship” situation. Previously trying to be friends with therapists or doctors resulted in very bad situations for you including unfortunate legal actions. Just keep seeing current therapist/pdoc. You should also discuss with your pdoc what happened with t (how termination took place etc) as he could shed some light and help you to move on