[noneedtoknow]

Greetings,

I have been working with my T for 15 months. It has been a struggle most of the time. I had a lot of difficulty just talking. I am able to do so better now. But the therapy has been a whole lot about "us" i.e misunderstandings/fears of judgements, whether he likes more or not. Frankly it has been ridiculous in a lot of ways that I have spent that much time wrapped up that in all that stuff that frankly doesn't really matter. . We havn't done a lot of "connecting" either. There have been a few times where it felt really usueful/gratifying etc. For the most part, again, it's just been a struggle. I find more and more I don't want to share my emotions/feelings because,'why bother?' I just had a few situations that were disconcerting. He listened, gave a few suggestions, but that's about it. I left and felt disappointed. I had shared some things and I know he listened. But I didn't feel emotionally supported.

I know he has been helpful in ways. I can see some value in the time. I have learned a few things and had the opportunity to talk about some things that I have needed to. I know he could be a great counselor for some people. I am just tired of the feeling that we don't connect. I still have the fear about judgement (which I have problems with that anyway) He evan has acknowledge he is not very good at validating/being emotionally supportive. yet that seems to be what I need. I have thought of quitting many, many times, yet I keep hanging in there. Maybe it's me, it's my fears etc. yes, it is, but I don't think it is all me. It's just hard to let go, cause I don't know what's on that other side. I am going to do a session with a new T. I am scared though that I will have all the same problems with this guy. But I think,"''''ok, might have the same problems, but maybe he has different strategies/techniques to deal with it". Don't know. I am doing this next step. I havn't "fired"' my other T yet. But I'm getting there. It's sad, I know he is a great guy in some ways. I guess just not for me?? Little ambivalence there.

Anyway, long post. Don't kow if anyone else has been there. It's just what it is. Thanks for reading if you have. Hope you all have a good day.

[downandlonely]

I have had therapists I don't connect with either. Also, I had one that I really liked. But we would just chat and weren't making any progress. It was like paying to chat with a friend. If you feel you are having trouble connecting with your current therapist, I think trying to find a new one is a good idea.

Just so you know, when you meet the new therapist your first meeting or two may be just the introductory (getting to know you) questions. It could take a while before you get into the therapy part.

[WishfulThinker66]

While my therapist and I immediately connected it just seems that we have until recently not done any hard work. Rather, there has been a lot of tip-toeing around and skirting what I feel what needs to come out and/or be worked on.

I really like her. One look around her office and it was clear we shared some beliefs and practices in common. While to some such objects would seem inoccuous and of little or no meaning I immediately recognised their spiritual significance. This woman is earth-centered in attitude and spirituality. This follows my own belief system so I found such things and environment comforting to me. As said, I like this woman and very much appreciate it was her to which I was assigned.

Our sessions have been benificial. Our talks are good. She has said some valuable things. However, I feel we are beating around the bush. I have some PTSD. We talk however about the day-to-day issues I face now. We do NOT talk about the sources of that which ails me now.

I put my foot down at our last session advising her of two very recent triggers to my PTSD. It was necessary to provide some background to the incidents. I ended up with tears streaming down my face (I can't physically bawl since ECT). I realised she had tears streaming too.

Anyway, perhaps this was the pivotal point. Perhaps now the lid has been lifted and we can commence with the hard and gritty work I feel is necessary. No more bandaids.