Couch 191: The Lazy Caterer Couch

Boyfriend got diagnosed with Asperger's today. Happy for him that he knows what's wrong with him after 26 years. Kind of an 'inconvenient' mix of diagnosis though, with me having bpd. But we managed to make it work so far so I guess it's fine.

I just ordered some Reebok's. My other ones are wearing out. But I've had them for three plus years.

I'm an Aspergic and I do not regard it as a disease or a disability.

I changed up my lentils a little bit yesterday, instead of using fire roasted tomatoes i used diced tomatoes with green chilis. It's quite spicy but good! A nice change from my usual. Next time I think i'm going to try making it with italian spiced tomatoes.

I'm sorry, that might have come out the wrong way. I know my partner doesn't think so either, he already suspected this for quite a while and has told me so. I'm just glad he knows why he doesn't think like other people sometimes, which used to bother him.

Also, I guess quite a few of us think like this. I mean yes some parts of BPD suck, but I can experience far more intense emotions than 'normal' people, so there's some positives to it too.

This makes me think of how my T was talking about my anxiety the other day, saying how it does have some positive qualities. Like probably making me a better friend. And good at my job as an editor (well, the OCD likely plays a role there, too!).

Aren't OCD and anxiety related? Like maybe OCD is a more extreme manifestation of anxiety?

Saw my son for a little bit last night, he came by to say hi to h's friends who are in town that hadn't seen him since he was a lot younger. They were amazed that it was a man that stood before them and shook their hands. They remembered a kid haha.

He has 2 more tattoos - another little pineapple and the other is a little one of trees and birds.

Earlier I looked ahead to the next chapter in my class, finally into the stuff that's most interesting to me, the Sun, Moon and other planets in our Solar System! (the name of the class is Solar System, so it's about time haha). The first up is our very own Star.

Hi Couch,

How do you prioritise stuff within your sessions? It's been quite a week, and I'm not sure where to start.

If I feel like there's too much stuff, I make a list and then rank the items based on what stands out the most (like what is the most upsetting) or what is the most time-sensitive. Sometimes I start the session by sharing the whole list so my T has a sense of how to parcel out the time (e.g., she won't get bogged down with one thing if she knows there are three more on the list).

I also make a list. If it's too much to all be addressed and I feel it's all important, I sometimes give a small write-up to my T so he can read it on his own.

T usually has a plan for our sessions but if I need something prioritized I email or text.

I thought of you today as I made a red lentil soup--but mine is Moroccan style/spiced.

Sounds delish fkm!

Ok Couchies, I have a PB&elderberry honey sandich and a black cherry cream soda and I am plopping down for the evening... who’s got a movie suggestion?! Someone got the popcorn?

I'm going to be trying to get pictures of tonight's supermoon, hope it's not cloudy!

They are related--I think they may both be classified under anxiety disorders in DSM. But I specifically have been diagnosed (in the past) with OCD, Generalized Anxiety Disorder, and Panic Disorder. And the various symptoms fit. The latter one less so in the past couple years. Definitely the first two. Though I suppose all the worry could possibly be classified as obsessions? But I have a couple compulsions (like hand-washing and some counting stuff--had a few other ones as a kid, too), so the OCD is definitely an element.

I do something similar at times. Like I might start out saying I have a few things to talk about and I don't want to spend the entire time on one thing. Or if I don't do that and I feel like we're spending a lot of time on something when I have other things on my mind, I'll say "I had something else I wanted to discuss, too." It generally works. I've also emailed him before a couple times and said "I need to talk about x, make sure I talk about it." He said he gets things like that from clients a few times a month, so apparently it's a common way of dealing with things.

Couch opinion wanted... Murky t boundary situation.

My anxiety has been bad, but I have always had anxiety about traveling. I have to travel with my daughter this weekend for a dance competition about 3hrs away. Tons of anxiety all around about traveling, but just also have tons of anxiety in general constantly worry about terrible things happening. Just not good all around. T and I were talking about it today and how I was worried about having panic Attack all weekend while we are at this event.

T then mentioned well he would be there for most of the weekend (I knew he would be). but while we are at these functions you are not my t you just the dad of another kid who dances with my kid. And he said yes, but if you felt like you needed to talk because my anxiety was out of control I could. And laid it all on me.. if I felt comfortable I could reach out.

Likely I won’t need that, but I also feel like I want a plan for if my anxiety is that bad this weekend. I want to know how I feel about it now.. and not in the midst of anxiety. On one hand I love how open he was to me asking for help from him. BUT- I think also, we have done so great with our dual relationship and clearly setting up boundaries, that I don’t want to ruin that. Though, I don’t think he would have offered if he thought I would some how take advantage from
Now on. Ultimately I know it is my decision, but I also want to know if anybody else thinks this maybe be getting close to really blurring the boundaries?